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What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.

SOCK IT TO ME BABY!!!

Monday, March 31, 2014

Sunday walk, Monday talk

Lots to cover here, so hang tight!  Pictures are coming!!!

First, A couple notes from the Hockey Update you can see on the NHFFL page.  First off, my Lokomotiv Yaroslavl team has done it again.  They upset second seed SKA 4 games to 2, and the exciting details can be seen up there on the aforementioned link.  I will note here that Lokomotiv, the 8-seed in the Western Conference with a record 2 games over .500, have eliminated 2 teams with a combined 64-25-19 record.  Next up is conference 3rd seed Lev Prague in the conference finals.

Also, as it is one of my teams in the finals, I'll note that Polish team Sanok won game four of their championship against top ranked Tychy 7-1 Saturday; they are now tied at 2 games apiece.

Finally, I oopsed and left out the just-started UK playoffs.  I'll hit that later on.


Yesterday, we had a quick, nasty, and fortunately non-lasting snowstorm.  While I bravely made my way to the grocery store, Laurie amused herself watching Scrappy and a squirrel ignoring each other on the porch.


Not bad for a rookie with the camera!

Next up, I have a few stories I have been consistently forgetting to tell that I am going to get to.  In chronological order:

STRETCHING THE BONDS OF CREDULITY:  If it has ever come up on one of your blogs, you know my feelings about the alleged "homeless" here in Ft Wayne who treat standing on the corner with a sign, wearing clothes sometimes better than mine with a scruffy beard to make them look "pitiful", as a job.  Simply put, if you stand at the corner with a sign, you are a fraud and a parasite.  This was taken to a new height a couple weeks ago when I saw some clown standing near the truck stop.    In view of the location, he had forgone his usual "homeless-hungry-anything will help" sign for one saying, "homeless-hungry-out of gas", with a plastic gas can in the non-sign hand.

Really?  Not too obvious, are we?  Would you have a "horse died" sign and stand in front of the stables if you were in the old west?  Guess what- if you need gas, you must have a vehicle.  If you have a vehicle, you have both a home and a means to go APPLY FOR JOBS!  Frankly, you should be honest and stand in front of a porta-potty and use a sign that said, "homeless-hungry- piss your money away."  Oh, and if your that hungry, how 'bout you eat the sign?  Lots of fiber there.

FIGURE THE SOURCE:  The other day, I was reading another story about a meth-addict mom abusing her baby.  I panned down to the comments (on the local TV news site) and saw this:

this prove my belief that everyone should be fix till they prove they can be parents

I would have brought up the point that, as there is no "parent practice" out there, this makes no sense.  Figuring logic would be useless, I replied:

And unfixed after they prove it? It just don't work that way...

To which the commenter, one "time lord", replied:

yes it is call insemination,

BTW, I didn't cut off their comment.  They just decided a comma's as good as a period when you don't use grammar anyway.

I was done at this point, but it didn't stop others from commenting.  Here's one:

lol right... I dont usually criticize what beliefs ppl may have....but that is beyond stupid lol

And here's the other:

What?


COSMOS WEEK THREE:  And I believe last.  Seth McFarlane used week one to draw everyone in, and week two went into telling us how stupid we are to believe in a creator.  Week three began what I'm betting will be the "subtle shot" trend that will continue from here- one shot at God, subtly placed and worded.  It was during his Isaac Newton story that Neil DeGrasse Tyson mentioned that science was being held back "by GOD..." (Emphasis his.)  Let me ask you this, NDT:  Why is it that Newton, the genius who discovered the laws of gravity and motion that "revolutionized" our thinking and "removed the chains" of belief in God, yet BELIEVED in a loving Creator God, and it is only the lower lights who come later on Newton's coattails that feel that Newton's discoveries "removed the need for the belief in mythologies"?  Lower lights that were lucky to find their asses with both hands, let alone learn what Newton discovered?

McFarlane, anytime you want to shift back to science and out of propaganda, let me know.  The science has been fascinating to watch.  I just don't feel like being belittled so you can prove a point unnecessary to the subject.

PUPPY LOVE:  In discussing with son KC a new Time Machine research project I was doing, KC heard me say, "Donny Osmond, Puppy Love"  He said:

"I thought the Beatles did Puppy Love."

"Nope, sorry."

"It SOUNDS like the Beatles."

"No, it don't".

"Yes, it does!"  He then proceeds to sing, "...They call it Puppy Lo-ove..." to the tune of Can't Buy Me Love.

"I see your problem,"  I said over laughter.


All Right, time for today's walk:

I never see beavers, but you can't deny the evidence:




  This walk was along the river on the soccer fields.  Here we run into the geese that have staked a claim on the on field:

 
 
 
 They were busy warning us to come no closer; they needn't have worried.  I was trying to go around the tongue of woods separating the north from the south, curious at the odd sounds I heard on the hidden side.  Scrappy knew a dog had been through about ten minutes before, and was running in circles.

But when we got around the tip of the tongue (refer to "the map" above if you desire), I found out what I had been hearing:




Yep, a whole herd of them  They ran around the north fenced in field and between it and the south one.






Where they were headed, I knew we'd meet again.  We continued (with Scrappy oblivious) around the duck pond and to the south field.


 
 
 The south end of the duck pond is one narrow window of high ground with water all around.  No problem if you use eyes instead of nose...

At the south corner, is where I knew I'd see the deer again.  I figured it would be a fleeting glimpse as they disappear into the thick growth of the "ends of the earth peninsula".  And I was right... but they came out where we just were...



... which is where Scrappy finally saw them.


We went on to the main trail and across the new footbridge towards the bunny field.


 
 
 Don't think I've ever seen that much water in the south canal...


 
 
 Ducks above...





...ducks below.



 
 
 Just though this look at water-weeds under the ice was neat...





We saw this HUGE bunny on the edge of the bunny field.


 
 
 
 Scrappy's first dip of the "spring"...




In the little bit of time it took to walk from the bunny field to the river bank (about 100 feet), this was the second idiot who ignored the dead end signs and was amazed that this end of California Road went nowhere...



OK, time to close with a last little bit of hockey.  The UK playoffs star with a week of quarterfinals in which each pairing plays a two-game, total goal series.  The winners go on to a one game semi next Saturday and a one game championship next Sunday.  This week, my Sheffield team one game one Saturday 3-2... and now wait until Tuesday for game two.  Nottingham- the defending three-time champs- opened with Braehead on Thursday and finished on Saturday- and the champs got stomped twice, 4-0 and 5-1!  The other two series played both Saturday and Sunday, with season champ Belfast beating Hull 4-1 and 3-2 and Fife upsetting Dundee 4-3 and 4-1.  


Not bad for a guy with one bullet, huh?
  And finally, the latest on the wandering Ouelette brothers.  When last I had tracked them down, the brothers (who we met playing for Adelaide last year until they mysteriously left mid-season), were in North America; Travis, apparently the mouthy one, had worn out his welcome on at least two other teams before landing with the Greenville Road Warriors- for all of two weeks before the team suspended him without comment.  Brother Britt was playing on a team in the SPHL- a league with a whopping four teams.  Travis had apparently been given at last to the St. Charles Chill of the CHL, where he was doing decent enough that the coach listened when he suggested they pick up Britt, who has scored twice in his first two games.  The rub here (and you knew there would be one)?  St Charles may well be the WORST team in North America, with a record of 7-49-10 and 40+ fewer goals scored than anyone else in the league.

Next stop: China Dragon?

Friday, March 28, 2014

Time Machine week 113

It is March 28th, 1972.  This week is a mixed bag for the women's movement.  Today, Barbara Jordan became the first black woman to preside over a legislative body, when she was named President Pro Tempore of the Texas state Senate.  Tomorrow, Oklahoma would become the eighth state to vote on the Equal Rights Amendment- and the first to vote it down.

Short and sweet.  Welcome to Time Machine, and on this week's docket, we have:

-Thirteen birthday songs, four of them by ONE band- in ONE year (care to guess who and when?)
-BJ Thomas makes the 45 at 45...  with a little help.
-What is the link between Bobby Pedrick (who?) and Barry Manilow?
-and a new #1 song!

Don't get "bugged" (not so subtle hint for the birthday song thing), hop in and let's go!


We open as usual with our look around the world of music.  South Africa gave up on that horrible Streisand song and put the Congregation and Softly Whispering I Love You at the top- and so did New Zealand.  Those were the only international changes; meanwhile, here at home, LA, WLS Chicago, and KDWB Minneapolis all have A Horse With No Name at #1; WCFL entertains the other half of Chi-Town with Puppy Love;  WDGY Minneapolis has The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face; and CKLW  Detroit holds with Betcha By Golly Wow.... and WKNR is probably playing something by Mantovanni now.  While the Country chart remains unchanged, BJ Thomas rises to the top of the AC chart with Rock And Roll Lullaby, and the Dramatics take over on the R&B chart with In The Rain.

Damn, is this show going to liven up soon?  Sure, just be patient.  Because now it's time for this week's Hot 100 debuts, and out of a whopping 17 newbies, I'm gonna spotlight... er, five.  Coming in at 98 is one of your favorites and mine, Commander Cody and his Lost Planet Airmen with  Hot Rod Lincoln.  At 86, Cat Stevens with a song that no kidding was in my old Church's hymnal- Morning Has Broken.  At 77, the 5th Dimension with Last Night (I Didn't Get To Sleep At All).  Ringo Starr comes in at 65 with Back Off Boogaloo, and entering at 54, Three Dog Night with The Family Of Man.

Just wait, there's more of me...
 
That brings us to a rather unusual birthday song list.  Turning 30 is the Scorpions' Rock You Like A Hurricane; turning 35, The Wings' Goodnight Tonight and George Thorogood and the Destroyers with Who Do You Love; turning 40 is Mac Davis' One Hell Of A Woman; at 45, The Spiral Staircase with More Today Than Yesterday; turning fifty five, Elvis with (Now And Then There's) A Fool Such As I; and sliding back to 50, we have Leslie Gore with That's The Way Boys Are,  The Reflections with Just Like Romeo And Juliet.   Annnnnnd...





Now, not THOSE beetles... the Beatles!  In a week when they already have She Loves You at #1, I Want To Hold Your Hand at #2, Twist And Shout at #3, Please Please Me at #4, Roll Over Beethoven at #40, From Me To You at #43, AND My Bonnie at #54, they debut FOUR more songs!

Can't Buy Me Love at #21;  Do You Want To Know A Secret at #75; All My Loving at #80; and Thank You Girl at #91 make four songs of theirs turning 50 this week!  If that wasn't enough, the Carefrees, three girls from the UK, were on the charts at 45 with their only hit, We Love You Beatles; and the Four Preps were at #92 with A Letter To The Beatles.  According to Wiki:

The song is about a boy whose girlfriend declares her undying love for the Beatles in a series of letters -- however, the Beatles reply that her undying love is not enough, and that they require "25 cents for an autographed picture" and "one dollar bill for a fan club card".


Not really surprisingly, it was pulled from the market after just three weeks- partly because it pissed off the Beatles' manager Brian Epstein, and partly to avoid the lawsuit the "borrowing" of chords from Can't Buy Me Love would have brought.  It would be the Preps last hit, too.  But before I leave the Preps, here's another little bit of musical character assassination they did in 1960, called More Money For You And Me:

First we have the Fleetwoods, a very successful group
Let's send them to Alaska to entertain our troops
When they start in a-singin' and puttin' on their show
The temperature around them will be forty-five below

Wo-wo-wo, I'm Mister Blue, when I say I'm freezin'
Just turn around, head for the warmth of town
I'm freezin' through and through
Call me Mister Blue

Next the Hollywood Argyles, a mighty nice group of kids
We'd like to send them roving on a downhill pair of skids

There's a group that we heard of that's-a awful hip
Alley Oop-oop, oop, oop-oop
We'd kinda like to send them on a little trip
Alley Oop-oop, oop, oop-oop
Where they oughta go we cannot tell
Alley Oop-oop, oop, oop-oop
But it's awful hot, and it rhymes with swell
California?

And while they're down there working, they won't be all alone
They'll run into another group that's even hot back home

They asked me how I knew
Our career was through
Oh, woah, I of course reply
Something here inside
Cannot be denied
Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo-wah
Smoke gets in your... eyes...

Next we have the Freshmen
A group that rates a cheer
Of course, they've been Four Freshmen
For almost twenty years
It isn't that they're stupid
Well, a little may be so
They can't afford to graduate
They're making too much dough

In this whole wide world
Is there nowhere to send them?
Is there no one place
We can tell them to go?

Sailing, sailing, over the water blue
Hail to the Kingston Trio, Cuba's calling you-ou-ou-ou...

It takes a worried man to sing a worried song
It takes a worried man to sing a worried song
It takes a worried man to sing a worried song
I'm-a worried now, but I won't be worried long

We got the Kingston Trio some work on Cuba's shores
They hung around Havana to do a few encores
Castro said 'I like 'em. Let's hang 'em up some more.'
Now he has all three hangin' permanently

Hang down the Kingston Trio
Hang 'em from a tall oak tree
Eliminate the Kingston Trio
More money for you and me

Dion and the Belmonts are driving us to tears
Let's send them up the river for about a thousand years
While the kids are watching Dion singing about the stars
The Belmonts are out in the parking lot stealing hubcaps off of cars

Each time I steal a hubcap it almost breaks my heart
Why do I steal hubcaps, why did I have to start?
Each night I ask the stars without fail
Why must I be a teenager in jail?

Where these groups all come from, we really do not know
But if they ever ask us we will tell them where to go.



And still, I have one more for the turning 50 birthday list... a cover of Stand By Me spent a single week at 100... recorded by Cassius Clay.  Yes, that Cassius Clay.


Despite the ribbing on the reviews, I thought it was a very nice, karaoke like version.  Now, don't hit me!


Oh, and Blow Out The Candles...

As for the big movers this week, we'll hit one in the top 40, and one in the Almost But Not Quite. 

Our 45 at 45 was BJ Thomas (who's sure getting around this week) with a tune called It's Only Love.  On Cashbox it would make it to #28 in about a month, but on BB it crapped out at, oddly enough, 45.  It was on an lp called Young And In Love, which was really an album of covers.  Among the hits- and future hits- it contained were The Worst That Could Happen, which Johnny Maestro and Brooklyn Bridge had just taken to #3; Neil Diamond's Solitary Man, in between it's first release flop and it's eventual peak at #21; I'm Gonna Make You Love Me, which the Supremes and the Temps had just teamed to take to #2; Henson Cargill's massive country #1 Skip A Rope; and Hurting Each Other, which the Carpenters are just sliding down our main countdown with and both Jimmy Clinton and Ruby and the Romantics had failed to hit the hot 100 with.


Not exactly going where no man has gone before, are we?


The top 40 this week welcomes 7 new members.  Remember a few weeks ago, when we mentioned the band Chicory Tip (or just Chicory here) hitting #1 in the UK with Son Of My Father?  Well, this week the song's writer, Giorgio Moroder ( going by first name only) brings it in at #40, up 10 spots (whilst Chicory crapped out last week at #82.)  JJ Cale comes in at 39, up 4 with Crazy Mama; Elton John enters at 38, up ten with Tiny Dancer.  James Brown, who probably leads the league in singles debuted that died on base, comes in at 37, up five with King Heroin.  Up 16 to #33, Roberta Flack and The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face; the big mover, up 20 to #32, Aretha Franklin with Daydreaming; and finally at #30, up eleven, the Honey Cone with The Day I Found Myself.


Did I mention we have a pretty substantial Almost But Not Quite list?  In order of the peak that they have begun to fall from, we have:  from #11, Sly Stone with Running Away;  from #12, T-Rex's Bang A Gong; from 19, Donnie Elbert's cover of I Can't Help Myself (which is the big dropper, all the way to 47); from #24, Jerry Butler and Brenda Lee Eager's Ain't Understanding Mellow; from 35, the Detroit Emeralds' You Want It, You Got It; and from 38 (two weeks ago when I was snoozing), Rod Stewart's Handbags And Gladrags.


Two songs into the top ten, two songs out.  The droppers are Hurting Each Other (the Carpenters' version this time, from 8 to 18) and Everything I Own (9 to 12).



The Dramatics blast their way from 23 to 10 with In The Rain.

Cher's The Way Of Love squeaks up a notch to #9.

The Osmonds tumble 5 spots to #8 as the Lazy River begins to go downstream.

The Chakachas bounce into the ten at #7, up 7, with Jungle Fever.

Nilsson's Without You slips another notch from 5 to #6.

Which brings us to the six degrees.

Robert John (whose The Lion Sleeps Tonight drops from 2 to 5) was born Robert (Bobby) John Pedrick.  And as Bobby Pedrick, the then-twelve year old had his first hit in 1958 with a song called White Bucks And Saddle Shoes, peaking at #74.  This was written by Doc Pomus, who we've featured before as the writer of so many great early sixties tunes, starting with (the heavily re-scripted by Lieber and Stoller) Young Blood.  Another of his classics is the lyrics for Can't get Used To Losing You, a #2 BB, #1 CB hit for Andy Williams in 1963.  The single was taken from the lp Days Of Wine And Roses And Other TV Requests.  The famous title cut was written by Henry Mancini and Johnny Mercer.  Mercer was another great lyricist from a slightly earlier era than Pomus.  But near the end of his life, he became a big Barry Manilow fan.  When he died in 1984, his wife gave Barry some of the unfinished lyrics Johnny had been working on- and from one of them Barry did this:





Paul Simon moves up a pair to #4 with Mother And Child Reunion.

Donny Osmond moves a quick 4 to #3 with Puppy Love.

Neil Young slips a spot to #2 with Heart Of Gold.

And the new #1 this week...





America with A Horse With No Name!!!!!!!

Did you know that when this came out, I was a ten-year-old idiot who saw the title in the back of a comic book and thought somebody was trying to say America (the nation) WAS a horse with no name?  I thought, "What kind of a fruitcake says that?  What does it even mean?"  Forty two years later... it makes just a little more sense.  See you next time!


Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Finally, a decent walk

The sun was shining bright, the air was cold and the breeze started out stiff.  Out went our two intrepid adventurers and their shiny brown walking stick.

The gleaming diamond walls of a faerie castle?

Nope, just what's left of one of the last snow piles.



Now at this point, I'm going to interrupt to bitch about Blogger.  Why?  Because I had half this post done when all of the sudden it went into it's "Let's move the picture everytime I try to add a caption" mode.  In trying to get the pictures back where I put them, I tried to remove one and it deleted all but the very top of the posts.  So, Google, the next time you spy on this blog (from Mountain View CA or Mountain View AR or wherever the hell you put Mountain View at next time)< please inform your people at Blogger that they are a bunch of brain-dead clowns that get 90% of their work right by fluke and accident.  Thank you for your time.
 
 
And now, to go on- typing it out since I can't trust the dashboard to obey simple commands...
 
 
 
 
The sun felt good, the wind, not so much.  We even ran into a dust devil!  Our hope was that we might get a break from the breeze inside the woods.

 
 
The hope was well founded- but the entrance was the muddy, mucky mess I was anticipating (thus wearing the old, junky shoes for the trip.)

 
However, it dried out as we went DOWN hill.  Gotta love that Purdue engineering!
 
 
 
 
Then, we saw a chipmunk- and the little fella actually posed!



 
I'm guessing these little mounds we ran into were from water trapped underground and then froze, making it stick out- much like my belly ay the bottom of the picture.
 
 
 
 
He was singing a fine tune with a distant buddy...


 
Stony Run looks pretty much like we left it...
 
 
 

 
But Scrappy caught scent of something by the bridge... and was almost willing to fall off to find it!
 
 
He led me along the creek bank after the mysterious whatzit...

 
But when he hit muck and water, I said, Turn around.

 
And when he wanted to climb the big hill, I said, Turn around.
 
 
 
Emerging from the Beagle detour, we came out at the ravine trail, to find the winter had been hard on that side of the woods.

 
I am beginning to think that the little ravine stream, once wet only in direst floods, is becoming a semi-permanent fixture.  Damn global warming!

 
Meanwhile, Scrappy insisted on checking EVERY hole...
 
 
 
And nothing says "Let's make a big muddy eroded eyesore" like cutting all the small trees along the bank near the new foot bridge down.  More Purdue engineering.  You know, Purdue- People Under Reasonable Doubt of receiving a Useful Education?

 
Yeah, all that "flying south for the winter" stuff is a buncha crap.  You stayed here all winter.  You know it, I know it.

 
And I really don't think Scrappy's staredown of them is so much, "Daddy, I want to get 'em", as much as it is, "WTH are those things?  Look familiar..."
 
 
Okay, time to post now.... assuming the fine folks at Blogger will let me...
 
 
 


Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Have you ever....

....looked for yourself on Google images?  I found it's not all it's cracked up to be.

The story is best told, IMHO, in reverse.  So, working backwards, I tried looking up Laurie.  Among the amusing finds in one page of Google Images, amidst several pictures of Christmas and Easter decorations (Which, if you knew Laurie's last name, you would also find amusing), I found that there were several students with the same last name at Loudonville High School in the late seventies; some chick in a "Kiss Me I'm Armenian" t-shirt ( and no, no Armenian in Laurie), and several books by one Laurie Elmquist, including One Easter Day. (again, funnier if you knew her last name).  It did have her Facebook Banner and profile picture, along with a picture I took of the Christmas lights in my bedroom and the stairway last holidays, and the logo for my Lokomotiv KHL hockey team.

Scrappy was a bit different.  Under Scrappy Beagle, He actually appeared three times- twice on the first row- along with a million other beagles.  But once you tried Scrappy Booogle-  then you get a whole page of pictures from this blog- ONE and only one with Scrappy in it.

And that brings us to me.  If I didn't want a page full of Coldplay pictures, I had to search under my initials- CW Martin.  Among the many things that came up were...

- One picture of Martin Van Buren;

-Several dozen pics of Martin guitars;

-At least a dozen pictures of Jesse L. Martin, who used to be Detective Green on Law And Order;

-A picture of the "He Man Woman Haters Club", which links to our favorite misogynist, John Rambo, and his forum on which he published not only my blog post about him and his multiple disgusting personalities, but all of our e-mails back and forth as well.  Obsess much?

- Two pics of the Flash, and one of Red Sonja, if you can fathom that...



- Three pictures of Steve Martin;

- A plat map of Whitley County, Indiana, in 1889, where CW Martin has a parcel in Section three;

- Two cows;

- A half dozen snaps of Martin Luther King;

- 2 pictures of Scrappy, and one of him and me;

- and one picture that says it all:



Me?  Well, other than the one with Scrappy, there was the one of me on the caps blog-



...and that's it.  Come to think of it, that's probably enough.


--------------------------------------


Is anyone else besides me sick of the pc world's one-size-fits-all rules in school?  If these two stories don't convince you "there's something wrong here," nothing will.  Though I am considering making this a feature.

Case #1 - a nine year old girl, with her parents okay, shaved her head in support of a friend who lost hers to chemo.  Citing rules against "disruptive dress", the school in Grand Junction, Colorado (where she'd get in less trouble smoking dope) told her she couldn't come back to school until (her hair grew back) or unless (she wore a wig).


The dress code "was created to promote safety, uniformity, and a non-distracting environment for the school's students,” Catherine Norton Breman, president and chair of the academy's board of directors, said in a statement. “ Under this policy, shaved heads are not permitted."

Apparently, though, the heat these idiots instructors took may have softened them... a meeting set for Tuesday night was to reconsider the ban, and the girl was let back into school Tuesday.  I tried to look on their website for and update, but funny, their site is jammed.


Case #2:  A woman was called and told her special needs son at a school in St. Louis was "panicking."  Like any good mom, she came to the school, was buzzed in by "school officials", and ran to her son's classroom.  Moments later, she was led away from her teary-eyed son in handcuffs- BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T SIGN IN.

“I didn’t sign the book, but I had to check on my son. You can bring me the book, She said oh no, I’ve already called the police. You called what,” said (the mother).
Calverton Park Police responded to the call that came out as an “unauthorized entry to a school.” The school was also put on a 12-minute lockdown and a letter was sent home to parents.
“They escorted me away from my son, who already has emotional distress. Four officers told me to turn around and put my hands behind my back, I was under arrest...”


And that is YOUR school, where the needs of the students come first.



------------------------------------


Sanok evened things up in the Polish Hockey finals.  Rafal Cwikla was the only scorer in the OT shootout that gave Sanok a 2-1 win and a 1-1 tie in the series against Tychy.

I learned today that their head coach is Miroslav Frycer, a former NHLer who scored 147 goals in ten seasons, mainly with the Maple Leafs, where he was a 32-goal scorer in 1985-6.