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What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.


Monday, January 2, 2017

Ye olde 2016 stats page

So here I sit on New Years Eve, and apparently the "grand plan" for going out has run aground.  Life lesson #265 for KC:  The more people involved in a plan, the more likely it will break apart on the selfishness of others who don't mind agreeing to something they really don't want to do and then bail at the last minute.  But rather than feel sorry for myself (it IS only 6:30 PM and I have plenty of rum), I said, "You know, I haven't done the yearly blog stats post."

So let me start out by saying that this blog is the 3,274,233rd biggest website in the nation, and 7, 214, 647th in the world...

...and that I have went back and found the most popular posts and most commented posts of the year!  The top two seem to have been HEAVILY upgraded by the Russian and French spam waves of the past year, as they got a LOT of pageviews without actually showing up on my Blogger graphs (in fact, both posts were in troughs in my graph...)  But anyway, here's the 2016 list:

#9 (tie)- from May 16th, my post about my birthday and all the nifty things that happened in history on that date, 121 views.

#9 (tie)- from March 9th, this post featured me getting nominated for yet another award, my punishment for which was to answer questions about myself in lyrics from my favorite band, ELO.

If you could change your name, you would change it to:

Ma-Ma-Ma Belle

#8- from October 18th, the world-famous "Bugs Bunny" write-in Presidential candidate post which featured my duel with almost-POTUS Cherunda Fox, 122 views.

#7- One of my most successful audience participation posts ever (without really trying), where I went to YOUR blogs and hit the "next button" at the top to see where it would send me, dated February 22nd... (144 views)

Robin February 22, 2016 at 5:03 PM
Well, now I want to know where you'd go after you left MY blog. 

Yeah, you left Baby in the corner.

CWMartin February 22, 2016 at 5:10 PM
I just tried... remember, you asked for it...

It was titled "Word Vomit", and had a Nathaniel Ratliff and the Night Sweats ad on the side...

#6- A February 9th Martin World News that featured kosher marijuana and how much pizza each candidate was ordering got 169 views.

#5- My silly "naming the new elements" post from June 27th that got 176 views and two comments on my funniest comments post last week.

#4- My favorite post- announcing the birth of Isaiah Christopher Martin, from November 2nd, with 177 views.

Hey!  Who the hell are all these people?

#3- Another cross-blog effort, Debbie the Doglady's "A to Z with little ol' Me", where you had to answer a-to-z questions about yourself.  Posted june 14th, it got 207 views.

I- In Love With:  Currently the Justad sisters from the band Tangerine.  See also Molly Rankin from Alvvays and Victoria LeGrand from Beach House.

J- Jealous of:  Occasionally the customers who buy our products, because if they buy our product, that means they have a big old boat and a lake cottage and THAT's what I want and won't ever get.

K- Killed someone:  What're you, CSI?

#2- With a barely-believable 294 views, a rant titled "Martin World Opinion", where I started out with the local SPCA and chewed out everyone in my path, dated March 1st.

#1- With a non-believable 558 views, the follow up to the write ins post at #8, posted November 14th.

And the most commented:

#9 (tie)- 16 comments on January 25th's post about a former co-worker who ODed.  Once again proving how wonderful my commenters are.  It is not forgotten.
#9 (tie)- 16 comments on a silly short post about the ridiculous names of the NFL players who got cut in the first round of training camp.

Name game: You KNOW that all these names come from a slot-machine like device that churns up a 2-letter beginning like La or Da, or sometimes a single letter with an apostrophe; a four to six letter "core word" which is basically a random pick of any six consecutive letters in the Chicago metro phone book; and a three letter ending such as "ius" or "ion" or "dry".

#7 (tie)-   17 comments on my rant from January 31st attacking Purdue's apparent  need to kill everything that grows around its soccer fields, including the prettiest shady lane in the county.

#7 (tie)- 17 comments on the Bugs Bunny write in post above, including two from former candidate Fox demanding I be shut down.

#5- with 18 comments, the "people are too stupid to do a Martin World News Post On" post which included a FB guesser identifying Mork and Mindy as "Donnie and Marie Osborn" from February 23, along with the woman that thought the Ural Mountains were in Italy on Jeopardy.

Jo-Anne's Ramblings February 23, 2016 at 9:13 PM
Oh yeah I remember Mork and Mindy, but also you know what the world is full of idiots who have no idea and these people make us wonder how did they survive so long without walking into traffic and ending up dead and no I have no idea why I said that I just wrote the first thing that came to mind

CWMartin February 24, 2016 at 3:36 PM
I'm glad you said that- fit the post perfectly.

# 3 (tie)- with 19 comments, my birthday post from above.

#3 (tie)- My "Last Campaign Speech", where I tried- apparently in vain- to convince people the world did not end because of the election results.

DiscConnected November 9, 2016 at 12:37 PM
I am a little worried...I hear no birds singing....I see no lovers loving....and my cat is nowhere to be found.


Oh, there he is, sleeping on the couch.

Maybe you're right....

CWMartin November 9, 2016 at 4:03 PM
Gotta open yer curtains, son...

#2- with 33 comments, the "Next Blog Button" post.

And at #1- with a whopping 35 comments, the A to Z with Lil' Ol' Me post above.

Al Penwasser June 15, 2016 at 12:29 PM
Good thing you weren't the Christopher who requested a sex change.

CWMartin June 15, 2016 at 3:26 PM
And the train's last cars finally jump the track....


  1. Chris:
    ---You have GOT to provide me w/ the link to see WHERE your blog lists (3,274,233rd biggest website in the nation, and 7,214, 647th in the world), 'K?
    Love to know how far down my blog's at (Bottom-Feeder Bob?)
    ---Had a feeling the RUSSIANS would score on highest number of hits.
    (same with mine)
    ---Cherunda Fox...BWAHAHAHA.
    ---That "next" button is like falling into the "void" w/o a TARDIS...heh.
    ---Yeah, the "new" elements was a hoot.
    ---Jumping the track doesn't begin to compare with those who "jumped the shark" last year.

    very good post (and a fine start to the new year).

    Stay safe up there, brother.

    1. It's a place called SimilarWeb, and let me save you the time- I plugged you in and you didn't clear whatever the minimum hurdle they have. It'll give you SOME stats, but you can get them off Blogger just as easy. How I am so privileged IDK.

    2. Well, if there is an "up" side to that, it's that I'm STILL: flying "under the radar" of Big Brother (for the time being)...LOL.

  2. After all, those sex change things can be traumatic. Especially since you can pee anywhere you want now in Target.
    Except the produce aisle. They'd probably frown on that.
    Happy New Year!

  3. Interesting...............just saying

    I don't understand why a man would want his penis turned into a vagina, really, I have a vagina they are not all that great, if you try to pee standing up it will run down your leg unless you are strange or gifted where you can bend over and have it shoot out the back of you, and yeah Tim saw a woman do that he thought it was weird. This thought you can blame on Al, just so you know

  4. Happy New Year friend, I don't know how you find all of that information .. But way to go!! Hopefully you're not leaving blogoland anytime soon like some other folks we know! just sayin

  5. Interesting. I didn't even know such a site existed or that there were so many stats on this thing. Color me oblivious. What's this about a sex change? Chris! You rebel you! ;)

    1. Y'know, Al puzzled me on that one too. I guess it was the Ma-Ma-Ma-Belle thing. Trust me, a sex change would be a useless endeavor in any event. I would not make a good woman, not even postmenopausal, lol!

  6. You had some great comments last year!! Happy new year and cheers to a new year of blogging.

    1. Yes I did- and those were just the funny ones...

  7. apparently I'm not cool enough to have any stats on that website >:(

    1. Like I told Bob, I'm puzzled as to what line I crossed to make it and you guys didn't.