If you ever climbed inside my head on a Monday, you'd know I spend a lot of time telling myself to move onto another subject. I have this sad tendency about thinking how bad the world is, how the PC police seem determined to suck all the color out of life, what kind of mess these little kids are facing and the things that were so cool when we were kids that they'll miss. Celebrating Christmas, heck, even Valentine's Day in school. The special magic of the seasons that adults now claim are offensive to their teeny tiny sensibilities.
Finally something stupid will happen (Like listening to the boss praising us for getting better at punching in on our new system, and saying, "Oh, crap, I forgot to punch in!") and the mood will dissipate. But then you come home and you read the news. Today seemed a bit exceptional to me.
For example: A Navy official told Fox News that punishing a lieutenant commander who used an unauthorized weapon to fire back at the Chattanooga gunman who shot and killed five service members could not be “completely ruled out,” and two high-profile former military officers, including presidential candidate Jim Webb, say the Navy is at least seriously considering charging the man.
This is the typical one size fits all reasoning that gets lemonade stands shut down and clerks fired from gas stations for preventing robberies. You want my opinion? (Too bad if answer is no) The only knucklehead needing discipline is the one who established no-gun zones for military personnel. That reasoning is what had French cops (unarmed) standing with their hands in their pants while the Charlie Hedbo massacre took place.
For example: "Caitlyn Jenner's 1984 Olympic Torch is sold at auction for $24,000". You ask me, That was BRUCE's torch. Bruce doesn't exist anymore. If Caitlyn is what he/she/it is, then he/she/it should give up all those medals that HE won- because HE doesn't exist anymore. And whichever way you slice it (don't get any ideas on "it"), it is NOT Caitlyn's torch.
For example: While I have every sympathy for Brianna Radar, and I think it is commendable that she is warning people of the dangers in misuse of cinnamon after her 4 year old son died from it, I have to say- Why are there things that ought not to be consumed by 4-year-olds within their reach, and why (since she apparently knew he was "exploring in the kitchen") didn't she either supervise the exploring or end it? I can remember being four years old. I had been taught by then what not to get into. I had been taught not everything belongs in my mouth. And if I did do something I shouldn't (like using margarine to "slick back my hair"), I swiftly was taught NOT to do it again.
For example: Just so we're clear, why would the family of 19-year old Michelle Wankoff (appropriate last names, apparently) NOT get help for her when she had already tried to poison the family dog, but instead wait until she beat it to death with a shovel and a claw hammer? is this more of that "we must be tolerant of her means of expression" thing?
For example: Kraft having to recall several packs of Singles slices because not all the plastic is coming off, and people are not only NOT bothering to check and see if they've gotten it all off, but they are missing big enough pieces that they are CHOKING on it! Okay, reality check: We did a picnic on our vacation, and one of the items in the picnic were deli slices of cheese. Though I didn't realize it at first, each slice was separated by a 2X2 piece of wax paper. Yes, I took a big bite. Yes, I chewed. No, I did not choke, because I didn't try to swallow my sandwich whole. I didn't have to take the cheese back to Kroger to have it recalled. I survived and learned from the experience. If there's a problem with the wrap, is Kraft liable? Certainly! Should a reasonable person be able to catch plastic on their cheese before they choke? You betcha. STOP INHALING YOUR FOOD, my children!
For example: Dems are becoming worried about Hilary's chances in '16, and word is spreading that more qualified opponents, er, options, are needed in the primary race. Among the names besides Socialist Bernie Sanders (Stay tuned for more here) and the other, non-mentioned candidates (the recently mentioned Mr. Webb, along with Lincoln Chaffee and Martin O'Malley), our beloved VEEP Joe Biden is considering bumbling into the picture. Beyond showing us what Dan Quayle would be like at his age, Biden would bring a sense of impending entertainment to the White House not seen since the administration of Gerald R. Ford. And other names in the mix include global warming scientist and internet inventor Al Gore (funded by Al-Jazeera, who enjoys a good joke as much as the next guy), along with courageous Vietnam hero John (I can't believe Iran would lie to me) Kerry. Oh, and also one Howard Schultz, whose qualifications as CEO of Starbucks CER-tainly mark him as a viable candidate.
And yes, I know I could do an equal if not better job with the 1,347 current GOP candidates, but we'd be here all night.
And, for final example: Let's go back to that socialist thing, where we find DNC Chairbeing Debbie Whatshername-Schultz getting asked twice- once by loyalist media guy Chris Matthews, and again on Meet The Press- just what the difference is between a Democrat and a Socialist. Both times, she hmmed and hawed her way out of answering. Now Matthews prolly don't get the difference either, which is why he asked, but you'd have thought she MIGHT have thought about having a pat answer on an index card before going in front of the serious Sunday journalists.
So what is the difference? Well, I saw the answer to that among the comments when a friend posted the article to FB:
The difference is obvious. Socialist are at the very least honest about their ideology. Democrats are only fooling themselves.
Seems to me that this 2016 election is shaping up to be the joke of all jokes. What are we to do when Hilary really is the best the Democratic party has to offer and Donald Trump is leading the GOP ticket???
ReplyDeleteI need a nap.
Like I said, I prolly with a little effort could make a 2-parter on all the GOP declareds. But I was trying to get out of my depression..
DeleteCrazy world we're living in now. I hate that everyone is so SUE happy! I am upset , I'm going to sue someone now.
ReplyDeleteI got a FB friend who could help you with that suit...
DeleteChris:
ReplyDeleteBravo for a wonderfully TRUTHFUL post
(actually ALL of yours are, but THIS one needs to be branded exceptional in this regard.)
I wake up every day and wonder HOW we're going to be screwed NEXT (and why the stocks of VASELINE have yet to SOAR into the upper atmo by now...lol)
Limbaugh called it on the CNN - Debbie Blabbermouth Schultz - democrats / socialist gig - the ONLY difference between them is...PACE.
(something SHE couldn't even figure the hell out)
Socialists move at lightning speed - democrats do it incrementally.
And I have to agree...
(look at the National Socialusts of the 1933s Germany...Blitzkrieg-time, baby.)
You nailed this one down tight. Very well said.
Stay safe up there, brother.
This is one of the best posts and worthy of any online magazine. Seriously, you hit the nail on the head every single time. Submit it and see what happens.
ReplyDelete"Mr. Martin, we regret to inform you... not only are we rejecting your submission, but you'll hear from our lawyer in the morning..."
DeleteThe news makes me crazy. I seriously hate watching it. It's always some horrible stuff is happening or some PC BS someone is complaining about. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteThat Kraft cheese thing is weeding out the weak. I mean, I remember having to peel strips of plastic off my cheese as a child. If I'm not so much of a dumb crap to understand to check and not eat plastic at like eight.. seriously, what the heck?! I say, let them choke. *shrug*
I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling a little cheesy about this story...
DeleteWow, I'm blown away by the combination of information and entertainment I just received here. The CEO of Starbucks?? Oy vey! Is he tall, short, or grande? With whipped cream? Blended, hot or iced? Too funny.
ReplyDeleteIf we were talking a she, I might care...
DeleteThere are so many idiots in the world I don't get letting a young child explore the kitchen if there is stuff they could do them harm, yes my girls all had fun getting into stuff in the kitchen but not stuff that could kill them and I would check and make sure they were safe and that the saucepan they wanted to wear as a hat would not get stuck on her head, because I am a good mum, yes accidents happen children drop glass bottles walk over it run up and down the hallway crying with blood pouring out of her foot before I wrapped it in a tea towel and rang Tim to take her to the doctor for stitches. As for eating plastic on cheese done that but only a tiny pit of the plastic then I pulled it out of my mouth before finishing the sandwich
ReplyDeleteGlad it wasn't only me...
DeleteThis is why I stay away from the news. It makes me too angry. My relatives abroad say they love watching the American news because it's like the comedy channel. :/
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, I came in depressed. The news just didn't help.
Delete