MWN: That's not news

Today I thought I would do something just a smidge different with this subject.  I went to my "go to" MWN sites and asked the question: "How many headlines out of this front page ARE real news?"  And there are some surprises, as we work our way to the 'most news' news sites.


Dead last of five: CNN

One of the things you learn is there is WAAAAAY too much entertainment news on American sites.  And in the IMHO dividing of stories into 'news', 'not news', and 'shouldn't be, but is', CNN took it hard, splitting the vote almost three ways:

News: 40%.  Highlight: "CNN went undercover in Venezuela- Here's Why People Are In The Streets".  Which actually identified the problem- people are broke and starving.  Congratulations, you actually did figure out what the rest of the world (with the possible exception of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez) already knew...

Not news: Also 40%.  Highlight: "The Fiji Water Girls were at SAG.  You May Not Have Seen Them."  In fact, I can guarantee it...

Shouldn't but is: 35%.  Highlight: 'Tom Brokaw Tries To Put Out Fire He Started With Hispanic Comments.'  The comments were fairly intelligent if you are a non-public figure not hoping to sound like an old sage, pretty darn dumb if you are trying to be PC like the rest of your crowd...

"I hear when I push people a little harder, ‘I don’t know whether I want brown grand babies’."

"That’s one of the things that I’ve been saying for a long time, you know, that they ought not to be just codified in their communities but make sure that all of their kids are learning to speak English and that they feel comfortable in the communities."

Gee, Tom, ever feel like you pay for ever opening your mouth every time you open your mouth?  First you bash people for being racist, then admit that you've been saying for a long time they need to go assimilate.

4th and trying harder: BBC

BBC has a problem with populating the front page with human interest stories and videos you go out to the kitchen and make a sandwich during when they play the story on regular TV.  Despite that, they did a much better job than CNN...

News: 53.85 %.  Highlight: 'US Charges China's Huawei with Fraud'.  Xinhua took care of the "rebuttal" in their news, naturally.  I just kinda wonder how much this is just one company doing this and how much is, "Hey, let's do this to drum them outta the club"...


Not: 30.7%.  Lots of the aforementioned human interest (supposedly) videos to choose from here... let's just go with, 'Going To Work Drunk Every Day', because I think it would make much of our staff more productive, and you can wonder why this wasn't in the Moscow Times entry...

Shouldn't, but is:  15.4%.  Highlight: 'R Kelly Insisted I Have A Sex Trainer'.  See, Bill woulda left you off with a pamphlet...



3rd, but not by much: Fox News.  The progenitor of this whole thing came out reasonably this week, though not as well as they probably should have...


News: 60.86%.  Highlight: 'WH Announces Sweeping Sanctions Against Maduro, Oil Monopoly'.  Can't wait to see how the Socialist Elite here in the states tr to spin that one... but I'll bet I put it in Cat 3...

Not: 26.08%.  Highlight: 'Singer Gets Bizarre Tattoo On Face'.  Yeah, let me put the singer of my favorite boy-band on my cheek.  The 'reporter asks, "Does this even really look like Harry Styles?"  I ask, "WTF is Harry Styles?" (Answer: singer for One Direction.  And I bet I know which direction that would be,...)

Shouldn't but is: 13.04%.  Highlight:  'Student Dies After Eating 5-Day Old Spaghetti'.  Yes, it was homemade.  No, it wasn't refrigerated.  And no, "The microwave will kill anything" is not correct.

2nd place by .25%: Xinhua

Xinhua is about as much dry propaganda as you can get outside of the now-blocked North Korean government site.  I usually manage to find something if I dig hard enough, but this is a "just the front page, ma'am" post, so...

News: 61.11%.  Highlight: 'Death Toll Rises To 58 As Hope Fades For Hundreds Missing In Brazil Dam Collapse'.  Kudos to Xinhua for being the only site that hasn't already consigned this terrible tragedy to page 2.  And for winning the "Longest Headline" honor, which Xinhua is also good at.

Not: 33%.  Highlight: 'Xi Extends Spring Festival Greetings To Non-Communist Parties And Personages.'  Xinhua is usually known for 3 things: photographs posing as news stories, out-and-out propaganda stories, and trying to get Xi's name in as many articles as they can.  Only one Xi headline this trip- but it does win the 'least newsworthy Banner Lead headline" category.

Shouldn't but is: 5.5%.  Only one here: 'Henan To Boost Rural 'Toilet Revolution' In 2019'.  Somehow not making the #firstworldproblems hashtag.

And the winner- the Moscow Times!

You have to get through a lot of op-eds to get to actual news, but luckily they do label it 'news', so there isn't much to look at but it's easy to find...

News:  72.72%.  In the interests of full disclosure, though, it should be mentioned that they only gave me 11 articles to the average 23.5 by the others.  Highlight: 'The Kremlin Denies Sending Russian Mercenaries To Venezuela'.  That is the current lead headline.  Three days and several inches downstream: 'Russian Mercenaries Arrive in Venezuela to Shore Up Maduro's Rule'.  Fair and balanced.

Not: 18.18%.  Highlight: 'St Petersburg Named Russia's Most LGBT-Friendly City'.  And the way the rest of the nation treats them, that probably means, "Look, you jail cell has Charmin!"

Shouldn't be: 9.09%.  Highlight: 'Russian Official Fired For Forcing Teachers To Clear Snow In Freezing Weather.'  -4 F is a tad chilly to be clearing sidewalks.  They must have a good teacher's union too...