What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.

SOCK IT TO ME BABY!!!

Friday, August 2, 2019

Time Machine co-ordinates VICXV5538157



 At work, I have a machine that cuts fabric via a computer (running Windows XP, if you can fathom).  And the panels I cut are somewhat large, so usually it will draw and cut part of a panel, and then move the fabric up.  However, instead of then finishing that panel and moving on, it prefers to draw and cut various other objects AFTER the panel in question, only coming back to the first panel as a last resort afterwards.  I call this procedure 'an excursion into the ass-backwards dimension'.  Today, I was getting ready for work, and I packed my lunch box as I usually do with a pop and a pop-tart., Except that I told myself, "Yesterday, you didn't eat your pop-tart.  So just a pop, no pop-tart."  And as I was about to leave I said, "Hey, wait a minute," and sure enough- packed a second pop-tart, but no pop.  I mused that I had already fallen into the ABD, and BOY was I correct.  What happened?  I'll put it to you as I did to my relief:  "The only thing I have to say about this day is, 'We shall never speak of it again.'  Alternately, my second choice was, 'If I tried to tell you everything that happened, I'd be a third of the way through and you'd say, 'God, I'd rather re-marry my ex than listen to any more of this!' "

And in this spirit, we are going to have an ABD Time Machine this week.  And just to help with the making this lead in the longest of all time instead of the short part of the post, here's your 6D this week!

Clyde Stubblefield was James Brown's drummer in the late 60s and early 70's on songs like Cold Sweat.  He also played on a couple of tracks on the 1995 debut lp by the band Garbage, who had the big hit Stupid Girl.   This band was what you got when you grafted a female lead on to a band I loved from 1989 called Fire Town:





And Fire Town was founded by producer-drummer Butch Vig, who also produced Nirvana's breakthrough Nevermind- and was born on our target date, August 2nd, 1957.

A 6D for our target date?  Why not? absolutely nothing else happened Sure, because we're doing everything backwards, or something close to it!  In honor of, I have dispensed with my usual Pepsi Zero while I type, in favor of...



...a Great Lakes Brewing Edmund Fitzgerald Porter!  So crack open an Eddie Fitz, go take a shower (which I did after putting the logo up instead of waiting till I was done), and let's have NO fun!


*********************************************

All right, let's get our guest out here- Pat Boone!  Pat, I... what the heck???


Pat, I specifically told you not to wear the metal today!  It's in your contract!

Ah, so what?  Listen, I don't like pain.  It keeps me from doing what I love, like golfing, playing ten...

And you really can't do an ad for that darn Relief Factor of yours!  Bellbottom, take care of this!


"RRRRAR!!! Bellbottom SMASH!"
Oh, good grief!  Elvis, can you help out with the Panel?



You bet, my man!  Now, our first contestant, in no particular order, was Buddy Holly an' the Crickets, n' That'll Be The Day, at #42 as a debut on Cashbox.  Then, you got Jimmy Dorsey an' that sissy swing stuff So Rare at #7, but the winner, at #2 on CB, was the Everly Brothers an' Bye Bye Love.

Hey, wait!  You aren't...

Here, Pat, now you do some!

P:  Thanks, buddy!  Next up is Russ Hamilton at #18 with Rainbow, followed by Perry Como and The Girl With The Golden Braids, which peaked in June.  Then there's my own Love Letters In The Sand, at #5- but the winner, at #1 on CB, is you, King, with Teddy Bear!

Now, we can't have 2 win...

E:  Of course I am, Pat!  Bellbottom, do a few!

Bellbottom/Hulk:  Hulk have pretty girl Jill Corey at 36 debut with Love Me To Pieces.  Just look, she pretty!

Hulk, I think...

LOOOOOK!!!



E:  Gotta admit, he has a point...

B/H :Johnny Mathis say Not For Me To Say at 3, Gene Vincent say Lotta Lovin', but not till two weeks, but the winner is Paul Anka with Diana at #20.

But I thought the winner wa...

B/H:  HULK SAY WINNER!  Here Elvis.  Hulk tired of stupid show.  Want more Bologna Casserole!

E:  All right, big guy!  That leaves us with Larry Williams with Short Fat Fanny at #14, Nat King Cole with Send For Me at #12...

And let me guess- but the winner is...

E:  No, man, that's the whole list!

Thank God!  So that means, choose from the Everlys, Elvis, or Anka for your winner!  Now, since this week is ABD week, I'm not going to imbed our two M10 debuts, but I will give you links!  Look for #10 Geowulf and He's 31 here, and #9 Hollywood Ending by Starcrawler here!

In the meantime, here's the rest of the M10:





King Leg holds at #1 with Running Scared, and MAGS with Drugs at #2, but it was Silversun Pickups moving 2 to #3 with Simpatico, The Orwells up 6 to #4 with Last Days Of August, and Beach Bunny's Prom Queen up 3 to #5!  ELO's Mama falls to #6, just outside the all time top ten, which Agnes Obel joins with Riverside falling to #8.  Also falling, but not from so great a height is Foster The People with Imagination at #8.


Stat pack time shows the King winning in the UK with All Shook Up at the top...  the #57 in '57 is Rusty Draper's version of Freight Train, a song written in between 1906-1912 by one Elizabeth Cotten, whose other claim to fame is that she was once a nanny to one Peggy Seeger, singer, radical leftist, and half-sister of Pete Seeger.

I knew 13 of the now top 60 this week, but my favorite was the quickly rising Tammy by Debbie Reynolds.

We have a Tony Bennett twofer on the big mover!  At first I thought he had won it with In The Middle Of An Island, which climbed 19 from 42 to 23; but it was actually the flip side, I Am, which moved up 21 from 56 to 35!  And finally, this week's big debuts were the Chordettes and Mr Lee at 54, Jimmie Rodgers and Honeycomb at 46, and the aforementioned Crickets with That'll Be The Day at 42!

Oh, How about we close out things with our (what would have been) 6D victim, Billy Williams, who was at #4 with I'm Gonna Sit Right Down And Write Me A Letter!



Sure thing, m'man!  It was a three song race- two of 'em got three votes, but the winnah got 4!  And that winnah is...




See, I told ya...



...Elvis an' Teddy Bear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Well, that's okay, because whatever happens has GOT to be better than this mess!  See you next week for 1958!

4 comments:

  1. Your brain was on the run, going overload with me!

    ReplyDelete
  2. My brain suffered a cramp reading about that fabric cutting machine.
    I think I need Relief Factor.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You shoulda been around for the REST of that day...

      Delete