Time Machine co-ordinates VII-X693586263697077

 

Elvis:  Boss, ya look a little down.  Regrets about our coming-up closing of the shop?

The opposite, actually.  I messed up again- I hate being sloppy- and instead of an all-new set of years leading off the last row of posts, I repeated the years from week 5 of the new volume.  It still got us all new songs, mostly, but... and then I was trying to get a handle on Alex Chilton of the Box Tops for our guest shot... but he had a tragic sort of life, too, and I wasn't sure I wanted to...

Nardole:  Er, sir, I believe I can at least help that last one... you see, (whisperers inaudibly)...

(Staring blankly for a moment) ...Actually, you know what?  That changes everything!  Nice job, Nardole, you were in rare form with this one!

N:  I was?

E:  What'd Noodle do now?

Just stand by, buddy!  Before you find out, let's play one of this week's M10 debuts!  At #10, new Duran Duran...

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So, Nardole will apparently be spending his upcoming severance pay on new ears, and thankfully he hasn't checked into it yet!  Our guest this week is NOT Alex Chilton of the Box Tops, but...

...Alex P Keaton of Family Ties!

APK:  Thank you!  Usually my sister Mallory would handle these kind of 'pop-culture' things, but with the Clinton era putting the bite on my 401k, I am always available for consultations!

Elvis (whispering) Boss, I don' think he gets that we don't pay...

(Whispering) And we're not going to tell him, comprende?

Alex, it's great to have a business mind of your stature on the show.

APK:  I'm curious, though, why you don't try to increase your ratings with live performances, instead of videos? It seems to me...

Well, Alex, at this point it would affect too heavily on overhead.  A Tardis costs a bit to operate, and...

APK:  But the savings in real estate alone, operating from a tessaract, that you must be realizing...

EP:  A whut?

N:  Means, "It's bigger on the inside..."

EP:  An money-boy here is saying that this is making us money- money youse and me ain't getting a cut of...

Buddy, if you think you can fill this thing up at the corner BP and drive to the next year....

APK:  Fuel can be a problem, but not an insurmountable one.  An outfit like this, what are you, nuclear?

Not exactly...

APK:  I've seen studies into advanced sonics that could apply to a boat like this; if it could turn self-generating, you could turn a profit in....

Before this becomes a WSJ forum, perhaps we should get to the point...

APK:  Ah, efficiency!

So this week's gleaning of my favorites brought us 16 songs.  I'm clipping off the top 5 for the finals and the bottom 2 for our specials, so that leaves 9 for the rest of the list, and that list is yours to read, Alex!

APK:  Actually, I subcontracted the job to my sister, Mallory!  Step right up, Mal!

MK:  Well, okay Alex... hi, whoever you guys are...

Subcontracted?

APK:  Relax, I'll pay her out of my expected residuals...

EP: (whispering) He's gonna be sore when ya tell 'im...

Actually sounds like a 'good' plan!  Go right ahead, Mallory!

MK:  Okay, so I know this is supposed to be alphabetical, but... well, I'm just going to go by the year!

The Duprees were #8 this week in 1962 with You Belong To Me...

The Marvelettes were #20 with Beachwood 45-789... what a weird phone number!

Martha and the Vandellas were #5 in 1963 with Heat Wave... I always thought Linda Ronstadt did that...

The Beach Boys and Surfer Girl were #6 that week, and Kai Winding's orchestra was #19 with More.  Ooh, 'orchestra', that sounds like your kind of music, Alex!

APK:  Actually, Mal, that is a classic, but it's a bit too pop for my tastes.  Do you think you could go on, now?

MK:  Sure, Alex, don't get all huffy! From 1969 we have Get Together by the Youngbloods at #4, Hurts So Bad by the Lettermen at #15... say, I thought Linda Ronstadt did that one, too!

APK:  I'm sure she did, Mal... right along with Kumbaya and This Little Light of Mine...

MK:  (sticks tongue out at APK)... but this one doesn't make sense... Johnny Cash at #6 with A Boy Named Sue?

APK:  Probably short for Sukarno, Mal... c'mon, time is money!
MK: Yeah, Alex- your time is MY money! From 1970, we have Chicago and 25 or 6 to 4 at #6 and Anne Murray with Snowbird at #17; and from 1977, we have the Brothers Johnson and Strawberry Letter 23!

Thanks, you two!  And now, here's the second debut, coming in at #8... from Russia with love...

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APK:  You... you let Commies on the show??

EP:  They ain't commies no more, Money Boy!  You need ta get Back Ta The Future, haw haw!

Now that one wasn't bad, Buddy!  Anyway, just a few weeks back, we passed into year #7 of the M10!  As such, I compiled a few statistics...

APK:  Aren't you afraid of going into statistics on an entertainment show?  You could lose your audience!

EP:  Gotta have one ta lose one, son...

...since the end of August, 2015, the M10 has charted some 608 songs now, from 311 featured acts (along with another 14 credits on songs that never had their own hit).  A while back, we established a limit of 6 hits needed to be official M10 superstars.  16 acts make that list, and with this week, we now have 4 acts with 8 or more hits!   Making superstar status at 6 hits:

Brooke Annibale

Anna Burch

ELO (the originals)

Geowulf (stay tuned, they might be moving up next week!)

ELO (Jeff Lynne's)

The Knocks

Lucius

Agnes Obel

With 7 hits:

Alvvays

Beach House

Castlecomer

The Shacks

With 8:

Alkonost (including the earlier played Solntse)

Dent May

And with 9:

The Jayhawks

The Explorers Club (And they have a new lp coming...)

And now, hopefully not contracted out again, here's Alex with the finalists...

APK:  Nothing but the best for the finals, eh? Your five finalists are:

Bobby Vinton's Blue Velvet from 1963;

KC and the Sunshine Band, Keep It Coming Love from 1977;

The Four Seasons, Sherry from 1962;

ELO's Telephone Line from 1977;

and from 1958, Little Eva's The Loco Motion!

Good job, Alex!  And now, the 3rd debut at #7... the third hit from Rest In Blue...

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Horace Bellbottom:  At this point, I shall divide the levity before from the levity to come with... oh, good heavens, there's no 6D ready- and the young lady has already read off the intended victim, Beechwood 45-789!

No prob, HB!  Here, work with this...

HB:  Ahem, well, all right.  It seems the Rolling Stone Magazine has announced a new listing just this week of the 500 'greatest songs of all time" in their estimation.  Chris has kindly weeded out the top ten that came from what we call the Martin Era 2.0, and I am to read the list.

Tenth, and it was the RS #14, was a song that was not released in North America, but was a hit worldwide elsewhere, the Kinks and Waterloo Sunset.

Ninth, #13 on RS, their namesake, the Rolling Stones, and Gimme Shelter.

Eighth, #12 on RS, Stevie Wonder and Superstition.

Seventh, #11 on RS, the Beach Boys and God Only Knows.

Sixth, and #9 on RS, Fleetwood Mac and Dreams.

Fifth, and #7 on RS, the Beatles and Strawberry Fields Forever.

Fourth, and #6 on RS, Marvin Gaye and What's Going On.

Third, and #4 on RS, Bob Dylan's Like A Rolling Stone.

Second, and #3 on RS, Sam Cooke and A Change Is Gonna Come.

And, since I assume you'll be saving the top song for the big reveal, here are our other features:

Our Miss Mallory also gave away the Overseas If You Please song- 25 or 6 to 4 in 1970- so, this week in 1970, the tops of our other charts were:

In the UK:  Smokey Robinson and the Miracles, Tears Of A Clown;

Canada Mungo Jerry, In The Summertime;

Australia: That same song, by local band the Mixtures; 

New Zealand: Pinocchio by contest winner Maria Dallas;

and in South Africa, The Wedding by Jody Wayne.

Finally, our big mover comes from the 1963 list, and involves an act covered with #1 M10 success last summer on the Shacks' Smile Now Cry Later- Sunny and the Sunglows with Talk To Me, up 33 spots from 95-62.

Well done, Horace!  And now, here's the rest of this week's M10:

9 and holding, Moon Taxi and Mission.

6 and holding, Bleachers and How Dare You Want More.

5 and holding, Black Pumas and Wichita Lineman.

4 and holding, Weezer and Enter Sandman.

3 and holding and switching with the next tune, down one- Duran Duran and More Joy.

2 and climbing into that #2 spot, Tom Morello and Phantogram with Driving To Texas.

And #1 for a 4th week....

...illuminatti hotties and Buck Meek with u.v.v.p.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The #1 on the new Rolling Stone all time list....

...Aretha Franklin and Respect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And the finalists, here's Alex P.....

APK:  Uh, yeah, so the final standings are;

Telephone Line was the #29 song of 1977...

Keep It Coming Love was two ticks ahead at #27...

Sherry was the #20 song of 1962....

and The Loco Motion was five ticks ahead at #15...

But the winner is the #4 song of 1962....

...Bobby Vinton and Blue Velvet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, listen, this whole thing with Mallory screwing up those two songs... that's not going to impact my compensation, is it?

Well, normally, we like to run a tight ship here...

Elvis: (snickers)

..so I'm afraid it will have a SIGNIFICANT impact...

APK:  How...(gulp)  how much?

Elvis:  Why Billy Preston even did a song about it, Money Boy!

APK:  What song?

EP: "Nothin' from nothin' leaves nothin'"!  Haw haw!