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What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.

SOCK IT TO ME BABY!!!

Saturday, July 16, 2011

More fun with scammers

Two more semi-original contestants on "Who's Dumber: Scammer Edition" today.  I've got to give our first contestant some real props for weaving current events into the storyline,

Dear Friend

I am Dr John C. Williams, a member of the Emergency MedicalVolunteers team
(doctors without borders/ Médecins Sans Frontières MSF),attached to the
3rd infantry division of the African Union peace keeping forcethat was
deployed in Libyaat the beginning of the recent hostilities. My medical
team was the first toarrive at the scene where the Libyan leader Muamar
Gaddafi's youngest son Saifal-Arab Gadhafi and 3 of his grand sons were
killed in a NATO air strike in Babal-Aziziya compound in Tripolion May 1st
2011.Please visit this web site for true confirmation.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-13251570Upon our arrival at the scene,
dead bodies were been taken away by the Libyanauthorities who later
granted us access to rescue operation. During our intensesearch for
possible survivors at the scene we discovered among other things, acache
of silver box stashed with millions of US dollars. We did not report
thisbut cautiously we took the box ourselves to a safe location where we
had theopportunity of opening it to discover that the amount in the box is
TwelveMillion US dollar (US$12M). In line with our terms and condition of
service, weare not allowed to have cash on us wile on duty, so we did not
take out a dimefrom the box. After that, we took the box to one of the
western diplomaticmission and secretly deposited it there as our personal
medical effects. Myreason for writing you therefore is to ask you to
assist me in receiving andkeeping this money safe under your personal
custody in your country pending mytime off from duty and my arrival there.
Upon your acceptance to assist me, weshall discuss your percentage and I
shall give you my phone number, togetherwith a break down on how the money
can be moved from here to your place. Pleasebear in mind that there are no
risks what-so-ever involved in this becauseutmost precautionary measures
was applied in this regard. For our safety herein Libya, kindly treat
matter as top secret while expecting your promptresponse via this e-mail
address.


( j-williams83@hotmail.com )


Kind Regards,
Dr John C. Williams


Wow, twelve mill in cash hidden in Libya, and Qaddafiduck's men forgot to grab it before those inquisitive scamps from DWB absconded with it.  I'd certainly try to keep it secret by enlisting a random person by e-mail to help me.  They actually did good spelling this time, but the 18 times their space bar failed them indicates to me that they might want to sift through the ruins and survivors for a new keyboard.

Our next contestant had a lot of trouble with his spellcheck after running it through the Yoruba-to English Google Translator.  You'll note that this from a division of Interpol ( a fact you are told nine time by my count), and that, unlike a lot of scam mails, here you are informed that you have already been scammed for "closer a lot of thousands dollars before".  Damn, what an idiot I was! Rather than pick it apart, let me just highlight the flowing eloquence(with my comments underscored):

FROM INTERNATIONAL INTERPOL POLICE FORCE UNIT.

RC-32657, HEATTHROW INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT COMMAND,
BENIN REPUBLIC.


Chief Hon, Inspector General Eric Johnson
Inspector General of fraud International Interpol Police Force Unity.
FROM INTERNATIONAL INTERPOL POLICE FORCE UNIT.
BENIN: +229_93_725_927
(INTERPOL)


E-mail;( interpolpolice1@moso.in.th)


CONTACT INTERPOL POLICE NOW


Chief Hon, Inspector General Eric Johnson
Telephone: +229_93_725_927
Email address:( inspectorgeneralericjohnson@yahoo.in)


Attention:
This notification email is coming to you from Benin Interpol Command and please immediately you receive this message do let us know by calling because we need to carry on with this importer’s work accordingly,(And we all know how much work Interpol does for Beninian importers!)
We are written to let you know that we have three gentlemen arrested in the Western Union yesterday name Robert Oleo and Good luck Brown anode of them came from Nigeria and through our investigation we discovered your email address from them which proof that they have scammed you before, The fact that one of them made us clear that they scammed you out of closer a lot of thousands dollars before.
Please we don't have much thing with you for now as you can see we are very busy but all we need from you to sundown your home address and your phone number and you count very well how amount you have loose under scammer’s down here in Africa because first thing tomorrow morning we will lead them to court and from the court they will be charge to jail. (Not really sure how to sundown an address, but whatever can put these ne'erdowells in charge to jail is fine with me.)
So you we mail us back now with this needed details if you don't know the exactly amount you have spent to Benin and Nigeria under scammer's control then you just tell us that you don't know the amount so that court will charge the Countries how much they will pay you as you are scammers then you will have compensation. (Actually, you mean, as I am the scam-ee, right?)Please all we need is the truth and if you never spend just make us clear.
We wait to have the details from yours soon as you get this mail. On whatever happen to Court we will let you know. you can reach us on this line any time,+229_93_725_927 please don’t forward this email to any person from Africa to avid them use itto do their bad work on the name of West Africa Interpol Service please. (I'm confused here; am I trying to prevent scammers from giving Interpol a bad name?)




Chief Hon, Inspector General Eric Johnson
Inspector General of fraud International Interpol Police Force Unity.
FROM INTERNATIONAL INTERPOL POLICE FORCE UNIT.
BENIN: +229_93_725_927


Thanks,
God Bless
You
Mr.John Mark
(and two questions here;  Interpol signing letters, "God bless you"- really?; and after all this stuff from CIG Eric Johnson, who the heck is Mr. John Mark?  The Interpol chaplain?)

So there you have it- one from the well-respected Dr. John C. Williams, although it was sent by one "bayo dada" and headered "message from dayo"; and one from the Honorable CIG Eric Johnson, sent by the blessed Mr. John Mark.  The choice is yours.

3 comments:

  1. Well, I just don't know why you didn't believe these claims! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. CWM:
    I say we call in ALL the markers, hire some mercs, "borrow" a C-130 and go OVER there and GET THE LOOT!

    And woe to those who can't come UP with it when we show up...BWAHAHAHAHhaaha.

    Eiher way, it's be "fun".

    Just a thought.

    Stay safe up there.

    ReplyDelete
  3. It kills me that people actually buy into this crap. I saw a documentary on TV once about how many people get taken in over and over and over again by these scams and lose their homes, life savings etc. Talk about dumb! I am following you for sure now!

    ReplyDelete