Who's dumber deluxe

One of the reasons I did my Eurohockey update yesterday was because I figured something (or things) stupid would happen to make me want to write on other things today or tommorrow. I was not disappointed.

First up is, in my opinion, actionable criminal stupidity. Because those two so-called pastors at the Dove Outreach in Florida decided on March 20th that a call from the President and the bribe of a new car wasn't enough, they went ahead and burned a Koran, directly leading to the murders of 7 innocent UN workers (and isn't that a hard commodity to find) and 4 protesters in Afghanistan. "Pastor" Terry Moore, who let his lackey "pastor" Wayne Sapp do the honors said the violence proves their point. So what's the point you're making? That Muslims are violent, especially when you violate their sacred texts? Hell, you can't even put Mohammed in a South Park episode, we know that their lack of regard for human life is legendary. That you, who knew full well what the price of your stupidity would be, were willing to be accessories to murder to show what big b^!!$ you have? Because that's what you are, and I would really love to be there when God looks on you from the judgement seat and calls you into account for those 11 lives, because Christ did not die to excuse that stupidity. I'm sure the muslims can't wait to have you before Allah, either; after all, Allah lets Muslims do anything in HIS name.

Second, how about Pat Bauer, Win Moses, and all the other little prodigal Benedict Arnolds who blew off their first session back because Brian Bosma wouldn't waive their fines? Get a grip, dems, real people in real jobs would have been fired long ago; at least you get to wait until election time. I think the real reason you are cheesed is because Bosma told you that he wouldn't accept third party checks. How in the world will you all figure out how to pay for something when you don't have some union rep pulling out HIS wallet and saying, "It's okay, I got this?" Win, I'm sure there's a "paying for your own stuff for idiots" page on the internet somewhere to teach you how to handle a responsibility in an honest manner.

But what REALLY got me was watching my beloved Oakland Athletics' season opener last night. Not that there weren't good things- Trevor Cahill looked good, the team set a opening day record for strikeouts, and Josh Willingham's first at bat with the team was a 2-run HR. "Chris, I hear a 'but' coming." Yes, you do. Cahill didn't make it out of the 5th because of all the extra pitches that he had to do because of the three- count 'em three- balls Kevin Kouzmanoff let bounce off his wrist instead of using his glove like a major leaguer. Of course, he only got errors on two because Ichiro hit one of them and would've beaten it out anyway. Still, this is the same guy that the announcers said was whining about having to bat 8th and then did the impossible- proved Manager Bob Geren's wisdom- by striking out so pathetically in his first ab that I think Scrappy could've struck him out. Even this only made it a 2-1 game. But then comes the 6th, and Craig breslow relieves Jerry Blevins with a man on, gives up an RBI hit to (who else) Ichiro, gets Ichiro thrown out at second on a stolen base attempt (his third of the game at that point), and celebrates his good fortune by serving up a gopher ball on the next pitch that Chone Figgins (see "Chris's least favorite major leaguer") put in the seats for a 3-2 lead. And THAT didn't compare to the seventh, where we find Breslow still giving up hits until removed for Brad Ziegler. Ziegler like any submariner who isn't named Tekulve or Quisenberry in ML history, has a tendancy to be all over the place, the more so the more crucial the situation. He gets a ground ball that Darick Barton promptly does a Kouzmanoff on at first to let it one run. Then Ziegler proceeds to try a pick off of a man who wasn't running-yet. The ball gets away from him, away from Barton, and nearly away from the right fielder as another run scores and Miguel Olivo goes to third. The next ball is where the dark cloud shifts from Kouzmanoff to Barton, to SS Cliff Pennington. The pitch is hit to him and he throws home to get Olivo. He throws it behind catcher kurt Suzuki ( who had already saved the run twice on spectacular snags of what should have been Ziregler wild pitches). Suzuki has to turn his back to Olivo to get the throw, and Olivo crashes into him, rolling over his ankle and leaving him lying in pain for about 5 minutes. Suzuki, tough kid that he is, says screw it, puts the shin guard back on, and limps back to the plate.
Then, after a bottom of the seventh made so easy by A's batters that the hometown announcer said, "It's good to be (Seattle pitcher) Felix Hernandez tonight," we go to the eighth, where the first ball is again hit to Pennington, who turns an easy charge and throw out play into a grab and a miss for error #5 (officially) and sent me at last to bed.

And the winner today is- me, for not going to bed after the fifth inning. Congrats to the Mariners. They really know how to receive a gift.

Things I don't get

I know, I know, "what a wide open category," you're saying. but see if you can explain these to me.





--- I don't get Muslims, period. I mean, look at it from the outside just once. These people are expected to give complete obeisance to a god whose main desire is for his servants to kill everyone who doesn't believe. I know some of you will say, "look at Christianity", but again I say, whose intent is being served? When the Church in its misguided zeal launched things like the crusades and the inquisition, were they obeying a command from God? Jesus said, "I give you a new command- to love one another," and "blessed are the peacemakers". Those who murder in the name of Islam can show the rewards they are promised for doing so- nothing misguided there. It is a religion of hate, for other faiths and for each other as they battle over who really follows the real successor to Mohammed, which was so important to the prophet that it slipped his mind, and Allah's apparently, to name one. They are much like the IRA used to be- killing as a profession and reasons behind the killing secondary. They hate infidels, they hate each other, they hate their women- mere property that are "so precious" that they must be hidden behind a closet full of coverings. "No, I don't mind that I don't get to look at her. We've been married since we were six and have had sex whenever I demand it since she was 9 or 10." And they resent us because we aren't enlightened enough to induct Shiera law into our courts. In the midst of this rant is what I don't get- how can you allow yourself to be/expect others to be so slavishly loyal to such a deranged god that his main command to you is "Hate!"





---- I don't get idiots like the one we heard about on the way home tonight, who kills his ex-girlfriend and sets their baby daughter on fire alive. You're upset, okay. We all get upset. You feel the woman has screwed you over, I suppose, and maybe she has. Even if, in the longest stretch of your imagination, she deserved it, WHAT DID THE CHILD DO TO YOU? Why do we constantly have these murder suicides that involve killing innocent children? One of the many reasons that God will never see fit to make me king of the world is that this chump would, upon arrest, would be taken to the nearest tree grinder and ran through it. No trial, no lawyer, no excuses.





---- A Cleveland father took his 8-yr-old son to the game with the Jets. They were Jets fans. (No, this isn't about their poor choice of teams; it's a free world there.) A drunken Cleveland Browns "fan" decided that this wasn't proper and TACKLED the eight year old- knocking him down and leaving him crying while he escaped. It reminded me of the day several years ago when Sam Wyche was coach of the Cincinnati Bengals. One snowy day in Cincy, the fans began to try to hit the officials with snow and ice balls after a badly blown call. Wyche got on the PA, chewing the so-called fans out for doing this, adding those fateful words, "You don't live in CLEVELAND!" Sam had to apologize for that later in the week. My question, then and now, is why? Fans in Cleveland and her sister city of Philadelphia constantly pull this kind of crap. One CBSSports columnist suggested that perhaps with fans like these, Cleveland deserves to never get a championship. All these years I've considered Art Modell an a-hole for moving the original Browns to Baltimore. Today, at least, I see his point.





--- In a NYC suburb, a couple of enterprising boys were running a cupcake stand. Their dream was to one day save enough dough to open their own restaurant. Then a police officer came along and said SOMEBODY had turned them in for not having a permit, and he would have to shut them down. Here's more:





The newspaper got on the case, filed a Freedom of Information Act request, and learned the tipster was Michael Wolfensohn, a Democratic councilman.
Wolfensohn told the newspaper: "All vendors selling on town property have to have a licence, whether it's boys selling baked goods or a hot dog vendor."
Asked whether he could have told the boys to obtain a licence instead of going to the police, Wolfensohn said: "In hindsight, maybe I should have done that." He added: "The police are trained to deal with these sorts of issues."
Getting a permit requires a $1 million certificate insurance, plus a $150 to $350 fee per two hours.





Obviously Democrats, fearful of the looming extension of the Bush tax cuts, are getting withdrawl shakes and are desperately looking for other income sources. I wonder how much of the per-hour fee was supposed to end up in Wolfensohn's pocket. The sad thing is this is about the fourth time a story like this has surfaced just this year. Isn't it about time that Federal, state, and local governments look themselves in the mirror and say, "this kind of law enforcement is NOT HONORABLE."? Or, to paraphrase Pink Floyd: "HEY, LEECHES, LEAVE THEM KIDS ALONE!!!"





Okay, done ranting now. If you haven't been mentioned so far in this post, have a nice evening. If you have been spotlighted...