Follow by Email

What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.


Friday, February 24, 2012

Never try to out-prophecy a fortune cookie

Last night, Laurie decides to order Chinese.  No, not the whole country, just some food, be serious!  Anyway, I looked around the menu on Waiter-On-The-Way in between complaining about that many items had no descriptions of what they actually were.  Not a good thing to those not real familiar with Chinese (food), as I found out.  A "Philadelphia roll" for example, descibed as "Salmon and cream cheese" (which is a tremendous concept in theory) is actually sushi.  I did not know this.  I also did not know that they apparently "cut" their ranch dressing 50/50 with vinegar.

Needless to say, I was less than thrilled with the results of my choices at the end of the meal.  As I ambled over to get my fortune cookie, I said, "My fortune probably says, 'You are an idiot'. "

Believe it or not, this is what it really said:

"You think that is a secret, but it never has been one."


Scrappy got one too.  His said, "your life is a bold and dashing adventure." Wow.  Two for two.


This morning I was all decked out to "watch" Lokomotiv's game against HC Sarov on the updating text.  Within two minutes, the Google Translate toolbar went into another coma.  Thanks, Google!  Fortunately, I could copy updates and paste them on the google translate site.  The first period, in front of a home crowd of 9046, saw no scores but a lot of penalties- and the good guys outshooting Sarov 19-3!  Fortunately, Sarov goalie Valeri Pantyushin (another name I might get changed were it mine) was not so lucky in the second.  At 3:09, Daniil Apal'kov dug out from behind the net and scored his 4th for a 1-0 lead.  Just under three minutes later, Dmitry Maltsev pretty much did the same thing, unassisted, for his 5th and a 2-0 lead.  A buck-ten later, at 7:16, Kirill Kapustin nailed his 4th to up the lead to 3-0.  And at 12:26, Alexi Kruchinin got a pass in front of an empty net on a power play for his 9th, and it was a 4-0 lead.  By the time the period was out, the shot margin was now 30-7.  In the third period, the shots finally evened out (7-7), and the play was more or less carried by a lackluster Sarov team.  Just after the halfway point of the stanza,  Coach Vorobiev pulled goalie Nikita Lozhkin for Pavel Shegala.  I haven't yet found out why, hopefully just to give the kid a rest.  Shegala handled the last two shots, one a hot one from the blue line from Vitaly Zotov that tagged Shegala right in the chest, and we hung onto the 4-0 victory.

Sarov falls to 15-27-10 and falls out of the playoff picture.  Lokomotiv has bagged third spot in the West conference at 13-4-3 and will likely get VMF St. Petersburg ("Holding the Navy") in the first round. Sputnik Nizhny Tagil is the penultimate foe coming up Monday.


Time for the quick Euro hockey roundup.   In the leagues still in regular season: The Asia League is all but decided, Oji Eagles are 20-5-9 and hold a 6 point lead over Anyang Halla.  England's EIHL currently shows Belfast's Giants at 32-5-7 but only two points clear of Sheffield and Nottingham.  Switzerland's National League A is in a tight 5 team race with defending champ SC Bern in the fifth spot; Sweden's Elitserien is just as jumbled in a six team race.  Germany's DEL sees Eisbaren Berlin in the lead of a field with 7 teams within 12 points.  Stavenger's Oilers hold an impressive 34-5-4 record and a 24 point lead in Norway's GET-Ligaen.  Finland's S-M Liiga has KalPo Kuopia leads a 4 team race to the title at 29-15-8.  Zhlobin leads Belarus' Extraliga at 28-7-5 by 14 points. In the Czech Extraliga, Sparta Praha holds a 7 point lead over Plzen; and Kosice leads the Slovak version with a 33-16-3 mark, 6 points better than Slovan Bratislava. And in the KHL, the West has SKA St. Petersburg (Which ironically is an Army team) at 31-11-11 and an 8 point lead over Dynamo Moscow, while Traktor Chelyabinsk has the same record and lead over Avangard Omsk in the East.

In leagues currently in their playoffs: Austria has come through all their preliminaries and are in the quarterfinals.  Black Wings Linz and the Vienna Capitals have traded OT wins, and BLW has a 3-0 win in game 3 for a 2-1 lead.  Medvescak Zagreb is the only squad with a 3-0 lead, having topped Znojmo 3-1, 5-2, and 5-0.  Olimpia Ljubljana won an OT game 2 against Alba Volan, but AV took the first game 7-2 and game three 8-1.  And Red Bull Salzburg has a 2-1 lead over KAC Klagenfurt after three tight game.

In Denmark's AL Bank Ligan, SonderjyskE ran off with the season title once again at 28-7-5.  They started the playoffs on a good note, topping Herlev 3-0 in the first game of their round robin first stage; Odensee pounded Fredrikshaven 5-1, Rodovre blanked Aalborg's Aab Hockey team 3-0, and last year's playoff champ Blue Fox Herning beat  Esbjerg's Efb club 4-1.

In France's Ligue Magnus, Rouen (18-5-3) took the regular season title, and with 2nd place Dijon, 3rd place Chamoix, and 4th place Briancon, get the first round off.  Among those that did not, Angers opened with a 6-1 win over Caen; Gap topped Morzine-Avoriaz 3-2 OT; Villard blanked Neuilly-sur-Marne 1-0; Amiens edged Strassbourg 2-1; and Grenoble topped Epinal 5-3.

Italy's Serie A is just getting started on its main playoffs after the seeding round.  And we end in Poland, where Sanok won the regular season with a 29-10-3 mark.  They lead their series against Jastrzebie 3 to 0; also with 3-0 leads are Krakow over Oswiecim and Tychy over MMKS Podhale; while Zaglebie Sosnowiec leads Torun 2 games to 1.


  1. Sushi yuck I am not a fan of chinese food although I do like honey chicken and fried rice......I have never had a fortune cookie either.

  2. Once I peeledoff the outside, the salmon meat and cream cheese wasn't bad. However, I don't think I'll be doing it again.

  3. Nice fortune. lol My best one was "Ask your mom." I keep it on my fridge. lol

  4. Love Asian food but not that excited by sushi rolls.
    Havent had a fortune cookie in a long time but they have always been fun when I have

  5. My best fortune: "You will be the mother of many". The next week, we got our first foster child. Later, we worked at a children's home where we were foster parents to 8 teenage boys at a time.

    The only time my fortune came true!

    I love Chinese food but do want to know what something is before I order it. I do not like sushi.

  6. CWM:"
    When you said Laurie ordered CHINESE, I didn't think the whole nation, either...just a few for laundry, cooking and giving her a
    They sure aren't AFRAID to ANY job...gotta hand it to them.
    And maybe that's why they get by OK.
    But I digress...

    I have NEVER heard of this "Philadelphia roll"...and I lvied in Philly for 45 YEARS!
    (I think it's contrived)

    Salmon & cream cheese (Philly brand, hence the borrowing of the name)
    Sounds like a Jewish deli order - lox & bagels...LOL!

    LOX, as explained in the James Bond Movie: You Only Live Twice, is not ONLY the acronym for LIQUID OXYGEN...but is also smoked salmon (pate`)...really big in Yiddish circles.

    And NO SUSHI (that is usually JAPANESE anyway)

    BTW, my last fortune cookie had a bloody dot-com WEBSITE on it...that just takes ALL the "mystique" out of it for me now...

    (and it's NOWHERE as funny as "help, I'm being held hostage in a fortune cookie factory".)

    Stay safe (and MSG-free) up there.

  7. I showed my son that fortune last night. "That only happens to us Martins!" was his responce.

  8. Gotta love those fortune cookies! So, what did Laurie's fortune cookie say?

  9. Laurie's had something to do with a facet of personality which had nothing whatsoever to do with Laurie. It was disposed of with a, "Well, two outta three..."