To A Stripper, Boyer's Hipper
Morganna, the large stripper whose hobby of running out on baseball fields to kiss players has not hurt her career a bit ("She's the highest-paid stripper in the country," says her agent. "She's booked a year ahead"), has rated some of the victims she has lipped.
She says of Wes Parker: "He doesn't kiss good, but he runs fast."
Billy Cowan: "I thought Cowan had sexy lips until I read in the paper that I kissed his ear. Now I'm really confused."
Frank Howard: "The poor thing. He almost fainted. I don't even want to mention him."
Pete Rose: "He cussed a lot."
Clete Boyer: "He kisses good. I told him I loved him. He said, 'I love you, too.' A week later he came into the club where I was dancing and jumped up on the stage and kissed me. He said, 'Now we're even.' "
In case you don't recall the legendary "Kissing Bandit", here's why the writer described her as a "large stripper":
Anyway, this isn't a T & A machine, but Time Machine (Although it is the six-month anniversary of the Time Machine Beauty Contest), and a far more normal one than last week. We have a lot of debuts, a lot of birthdays, one of music's first supergroups, how a pissed-off ex-wife led to a famous singer's biggest hit, and the return of a lady featured way back last August in six degrees who makes a return trip. Belt in, and we'll ease on down the road...
We had 11 hot 100 debuts this week, and the five I knew were big ones! The Spinners' first big hit, It's A Shame, comes in at 95. Anne Murray makes her first big splash in the US of A, Snowbird coming in at 93. Clarence Carter's moving Patches debuts at 71. Chicago tips the scale at 67 with 25 Or 6 To 4. And at 65, the Guess Who jump the game with Hand Me Down World.
Those songs all turn 42 this week. Our other birthday songs start out at 30 years ago when Frank and Moon Zappa (who barely missed a mention in the six degrees) hit with the infamous Valley Girl. Omigod! Turning 35 this week are a half-dozen including Foreigner's Cold As Ice, Carole King's Hard Rock Cafe, The Bee Gees' Edge Of The Universe, KC and the Sunshine Band's Keep It Coming Love, Carly Simon's Bond theme Nobody Does It Better, and Ted Nugent's Cat Scratch Fever. Three more turn 40: Bread's Guitar Man, The Bee Gees (again) with Run To Me, and Easy Living by Uriah Heap. Two more turn 45: the double sided hit Pleasant Valley Sunday/Words by the Monkees, and Jay and the Techniques' Apple Peaches Pumpkin Pie. Finally turning 50 are one of my favorite doo-wop groups, the Duprees, with You Belong To Me. Blow out the candles...
Today's look back in time takes us to what can only be called the prototype supergroup. Previous featuree Billy Murray was told by his bosses they wanted to hear him in a quartet like the dominant ones of the time- the Hayden Quartet and the Peerless Quartet, both of which were also featureees in the past. So he was hooked up with John Bieling and William F. Hooley of the Haydens, and Steve Porter of the Peerless group. The group was best known as the American Quartet. Murray was signed with Victor for discs (and the Quartet was the American), but was exclusive to Edison for cylinders (and they called the quartet the Premier Quartet). The group was formed in 1909, and racked up 50 top 40 hits, 48 top 10s, and 6 #1s. The membership wasn't static: their producer was a slave driver and Bieling quit in 1913 because of voice damage. He was replaced first by Robert Armour, then by John Young. Hooley was also replaced after his death in October 1918.
Their biggest hit was the #1 Moonlight Bay in early spring of 1912; but their biggest stretch of success came in the run-up and then the declaration of war in 1917, including three straight #1s- Oh Johnny, Oh Johnny, Oh; Goodbye Broadway, Hello France; and George M. Cohen's Over There. From 1918-20 Murray was a free agent, and the band recorded with various labels under several variations of the "American" name. But then another big (and previously featured) star of the age, Henry Burr, made a package deal for him, his quartet (the Peerless), and Murray, where the Peerless group sans Burr would be Murray's American Quartet (while still recording as the Peerless with Burr). Murray and Burr got $35,000 each, the other three guys got $15,000. Critics believe that Murray was still recording with his original group by the vocal qualities on their recordings. But they were never quite so big after that 1917 streak.
The Delfonics score the biggest dropper with a tune that peaked last week at 41, called Trying To Make A Fool Of Me, and falls 18 to #59. The fastest climber in the countdown this week is Edwin Starr's War, up 30 notches to #49.
Edwin Starr and Ringo Starr: apparently not related.
Which brings us to our Where Are They Now segment, and sitting at #50 are the Who with their cover of Summertime Blues. Now most of us know that there are but two survivors of the original Who: Roger Daltrey and Pete Townshend. Keith Moon ODed on an anti-alcohol drug in 1978, and some may remember that John Entwistle also passed from a cocaine-induced heart attack in 2002. But the remaining duo work on a lot of projects together including the November 2011 establishment of the Roger Daltrey and Peter Townshend Teen and Young Adult Cancer Program at the Ronald Reagan UCLA medical center. They've also announced a tour based on their 1973 classic lp Quadrophenia that kicked off for 35 dates starting two days ago. The band will include Zak Starkey (Ringo's son; see what happens when you give the man a foot in?), Pino Palladino (who replaced Entwistle after his death), Simon Towshend (Pete's "little" brother), and Chris Stainton (who replaced Gary Wright way back when in the band Spooky Tooth, which is best known here in the States for being the band Gary Wright started out with).
Six songs make their top forty debut this week, three of which we just got done playing to see if we knew them (results, 0 for 3). Up 11 spots to #40 is Tommy Roe with Pearl. Up from 49 to 38 is Ronnie Dyson with If You Let Me Make Love To You.
James "the vacuum guy" Dyson and Ronnie Dyson: Apparently not related.
Moving up 10 to #36 are the Three Degrees with Maybe. Robin McNamara, a cast member of Hair, hits at 35, up 9, with Lay A Little Lovin' On Me. Englebert Humperdink moves 11 to 34 with My Marie. and Eric Burden and War jump 16 to #26 with Spill The Wine.
Two songs make BIG moves into the top 10, two fall out. Our boy Miguel Rios drops to 11 after one week at 9 with A Song Of Joy; Vanity Faire falls 5 to 13 with Hitchin' A Ride.
Bread storms up 13 spots to #10 with Make It With You.
The Jackson boys fall 5 to #9 with The Love You Save.
Up two to #8 are The Five Stairsteps with O-o-h Child.
The Pimpkins (AKA Tony Burrows) hold at seven with Gimme Dat Ding.
And that brings us to our week-delayed six degrees victims.
Blues Image (which tumbles one spot to #6 with Ride Captain Ride) had their first mainstream success with this song from the lp Open. Along with Ride, one of the tracks on Open was a cover of Ritchie Valens' La Bamba. Ritchie's original included a lady who got a spot in the six degrees way back on Time Machine' Vol. one's week 70. Carole Kaye (and you can see some of her many credits in her six degrees appearance here ) was a guitarist on this track as she was on so many others. One of those others was Wayne Newton's Danke Schoen (a song that was supposed to be Bobby Darin's follow-up to Mack The Knife, but Bobby heard Wayne sing and gave it to him). Wayne's most known hit, though, is probably Daddy Don't You Walk So Fast- but it took a pissed-off woman to get it out there. Rosalie Trombley was the programming director at Detroit's CKLW, when it came to her station- and she was looking for a way to shame her ex-husband into using his visitation rights with their children. She gave it heavy airplay, and it took off from there. Whether deadbeat dad did the same I don't know.
Melanie and friends slide 2 to #5 with Lay Down (Candles In The Rain).
Climbing two to # 4 is Freda Payne and Band Of Gold.
Roasting its way through the top ten from 11 to #3 this week, the Carpenters and (They Long To Be) Close To You.
Holding at #2 are the Temptations with Ball Of Confusion.
And at #1 for a second week... Three Dog Night with Mama Told Me (Not To Come)!!
See, a lot easier than last week's haunted house countdown. Be back Saturday for the eighties countdown!