About my faith? With God? Of course not. My conflict has been with myself, my attitudes, how I react to things, and the continuing struggle of "not understanding the plan".
If you read other people's comments and landed on this week's Time Machine, you'll see that it fell to a pretty sorry state. If not, trust me. I had to pull down a response I made to an upset commentor because I gave a BS answer that I couldn't live with. Over something THAT stupid.
Today pastor Jeremiah made several large holes in my path, beginning with, "You cannot worship whom you do not love, and you cannot love whom you do not know." Time for a show of hands of just who hasn't been reading the Word lately like he should, or immersing himself in lessons as he should.
Thus, I flat out issued myself a challenge this morning. Placing my Bible on the table entering my bedroom, I said, "You WILL NOT enter this room without reading from this book."
And as God would have it, I was ready to enter Romans 7 and 8. And at first, I saw right away a grouping of things that applied to my current mindset. But then, with a deeper look, I saw how each of these things were a set of conflicts that I was letting derail me.
CONFLICT #1: Who's in charge here?
Rom 7:15 For that which I do, I know not. For what I desire, that I do not do; but what I hate, that I do.
Rom 7:16 If then I do that which I do not desire, I consent to the law that it is good.
Rom 7:17 But now it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwells in me.
CONFLICT #2: So, take me to the battlefield.
Rom 8:6 For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace
Rom 8:7 because the carnal mind is enmity against God, for it is not subject to the Law of God, neither indeed can it be.
CONFLICT # 3: So why were we brought into this underfed, overpopulated, polluted world (apologies to Meathead)?
This one I had to figure out in reverse order. Part one:
Rom 8:21 that the creation itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.
CONFLICT # 4: Whaddya mean, the papers ain't signed yet?
Why is it so hard to keep the promise in mind? Well, when I read on, I got an idea why:
So here we have four conflicts- between flesh and spirit; between the mind we were born with and the mind we choose; between the future of hope and the present of futility; and between what we expect from God and what God really offers- that serve to keep us from having peace in our Christian walks. And this is where Satan drives a wedge between us, because we keep expecting a sign, we expect God to "come through" for us, And this brings us to one more conflict:
CONFLICT # 5: Where's your proof?
Rom 8:25 But if we hope for that which we do not see, then we wait for it with patience.
Here is where the atheists claim that (a God that demands this is not worthy of worship"; But God is asking us for this. He is asking:
-That we choose against flesh desires;
-That we discipline our minds;
-That we ignore the futility for the Promise;
-That we wait for the Promise to be delivered AFTER this life;
-And that we be blessed by "having not seen and yet believed".
Every one of these thing sets us up for conflict- for physical, mental, and spiritual battle- with the Devil, the world, and our own physical being. Not every Cross to be borne involves moving mountains or raising the dead. Sometimes it involves sitting your stubborn butt down and reading, turning off that stupid TV and listening.