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What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.


Monday, September 8, 2014

Writing for the weekend

Well, like an idiot I decided to write a funny post about the weekend just past - but read the news first.  There are just so many morons I can take sometimes...

Two Delaware teens were arrested in the beating of a mentally disabled man after they showed up to police headquarters to complain about being harassed when their contact information was posted to social media, along with a video of the assault, authorities said Monday.
New Castle County Police arrested the 13- and 14-year-old boys, both of Newark, on Saturday. They were charged with offensive touching, assault of a vulnerable adult, and conspiracy. They were released on bonds of $2,500 after being arraigned.

Yes, that's right.  The idiots beat a man, got videoed doing it by someone who knew "something had to be done."  She posted the video, added their IDs and contact info, and THEY went to the police because SHE harassed them!  But rather than get into a long post of "Why are people like this nowdays?" let me give you the weekend rundown.  Sorry no pictures.. well, wait, here's one...

So we went to the bark park Friday just prior to the great deluge (PS to out of towners- we got a BIG rainstorm Friday night).  Nova was there, and another Dexter (not the Aussie mix, this one looks a lot like Mama Fox but bigger and darker), and a beagle named Fin or Vin, I didn't quite catch, a boxer or two, and a big chocolate dog that looked like a dobie mix that was either Ovie or Opie, something like that.  Anyway, the big attention here was Scrappy continually wanting to hump Fin.  And Nova, the young and budding policeman, breaking it up over and over.  Then assaulting one or the other of the beagles.  Ovie got into it with Dexter and made him yip, and everybody with a tail crowded around to see what happened.  Ovie got took home, and the boxers soon followed.  Then Nova's mom pointed to two approaching puppies.  "They like to hump, too,"  she said.  "This ought to be fun."

Sure enough, here came Brodie and Rocco- two Jack Russell/beagle mixes with the long torsos that suggested Dachshund somewhere in the family tree.  And Scrappy's karma being what it was, he swiftly started getting tag-teamed.  He would sit under the bench by me until one of them made him mad, and get attacked from the flank when he moved.  At one point, he chased one of them clear across the park under the doggie ramp, at which point, as he paused to see what his antagonist was doing, the other got him from behind!  Nova continued to break things up only to then attack either victim or attacker.  It was a great time, but Scrappy came home with a two-day limp.

So Saturday, with the sinus infection that was sneaking up on me all week starting to get closer, we tried to make a go of Grabill Country Fair.  For those of you from out of town, Grabill Days is one of the two must-see fall events (Johnny Appleseed being the other), set in a little crafty town in the middle of Amish territory.  Which reminds me, we saw an Amish (perhaps Mennonite) lady with a weed-eater on the way there.

And an Amish guy with a leaf-blower.

And another with a power mower.  Goat's must have been sick.

So anyway, we get there just as the parade was breaking up.  This meant that we would be parking a loooong way from town, by the side of the road.  As we walked past folding fold up chairs and those still too busy watching the crowd to abandon their parade spots, we discussed the pros and cons of living in Grabill at this time of year.

-you don't have to find a parking spot.
-everything's in walking distance.

-everythings on your front porch, in your yard, and won't go away.
-you can't get out to leave.

As Laurie began to muse on a comment of mine that they could easily turn "People of Wal-Mart" to "People of Grabill Days", I turned to another tangent and said, "I'd hate to be 9 months pregnant around here."

Laurie, still on the other thing, said, "Yes, you could make people pay to watch..."

Me, lighting up: "Yep!  'Woman having baby, 50 cents!'"

L:  "That's mot what I meant..."

Me:  "Just set her up in the living room, have people file past like a museum!  'Damnit! She's dilated 8 centimeters!  This line's so long, the kid'll be in college before we get in!' "

Unfortunately, we just weren't up for the junk food and mindless milling about, and we left.  Minutes later, a lady who was "just rolling while I looked in the rear view mirror" hit us in the butt.  No damage except to heart rates and underwear.  I kept quiet, not really wanting to hear her explanation of why you would look in the rearview at a stop while rolling.

Sunday, as the sinus infection picked up steam... we watched the ball games.  Saw my Dolphins smash Tom Brady and company, Antonio Brown make his "that'll cost me 25 K" kick, and...

...a little of the Cowboys game.


  1. I love the Amish... so many rules, so little time to break them all. We had some guy up here FLY a bunch of them in to build his barn... they used all the power tools and machinery they wanted because it wasn't THEIRS. *sigh* It did come out beautiful though...

    The saddest part on the first case you mentioned? I suspect the woman will be charged at some point for harassment.


    1. Rub of that? It was a 16-y-o girl what turned them in...

  2. Oh dear. Scrappy doesn't understand karma.

    I agree with ABFTS... what is up with the Amish these days????

    1. I think reality set in with the last generation, and is making a glacial shift toward more modern ways of showing your faith... not sure whether its a good idea or not, but never did think hiding was the answer.

  3. Are you sure these aren't Eli Manning's memes? He sucked last night. Had me yelling and cursing at the television. Jerk. Whew. I feel better. Thank you!

    1. I remember the Eli meme that said, "They told me when I grew up I could be anything I wanted- so I became Tony Romo". I hear the new OC wants him to hit 70% of his passes. 54 % was astounding because his receivers had plywood for hands.

  4. Chris:
    Sounded like Scrappy REALLY needed a HUG yesterday (best day of the year to do it, too)

    Sinus infection...still (slowly) getting over mine...maybe I got that enterovirus 68?
    (funny, I gradiated in 70)
    At least the antibodies will have that rounded up.

    As to those local small town events?
    Being from a big city, I DO enjoy long as everyone ELSE and their relatives don't show up. Locals are fine by me.
    (getting to not like crowds as much...wonder why?)

    Years ago, Wifey and I went down to the Jay County Fair...had a BLAST!

    Sorry to hear about the rear-ender, but glad nothing to report took place (aside from the underwear thing...)
    IT happens.

    Nowhere as good as it was back in the 60s, 70s, and 80s.
    (and a lot fewer cases of abuse to women in elevators)

    Amish w/ power tools?
    Maybe they figured out that ELECTRICITY comes primarily from COAL and STEAM???
    Just a thought.

    Good post.
    Stay safe (and healthy) up there.

    1. About the only time I'm good with crowds anymore is at Appleseed. And I think that just like every other social group in this country you can name (with the possible exception of "old codgers like us", ) the Amish are just getting lazier with time.

  5. Hilarious post! Glad no one was injured in the rear ender and laughing at the Amish leaf blower and sick goats. My neighbor could use a goat, but the beautification committee doesn't allow it. Def enjoyed reading the post!

    1. Glad you liked it! Not as good as your usual posts are, but I WAS ill at the time...

  6. Those memes are funny- sad but funny! I love my Cowboys no matter what.

  7. I remember your reaction to Romo's latest contract. Don't you wish owners had to re-sign, as well?

  8. Oh and my dogs seem to be enjoying humping each other as well. It makes me very uncomfortable! jax seems to be the instigator.... welcome to your new home now let me grab you behind! Poor Opie!

    1. When Scrappy met Baxter, they had a marking contest indoors. Luckily it was in the place we were moving FROM. Humping doesn't seem so bad in that light.