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What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.


Tuesday, November 11, 2014

I know you're expecting a Martin World News post...

...but I don't have quite the material for a full-blown MWN, so consider this a mini.

ITEM:  Something happened this week in our fantasy league, which has only happened once before (I had to research, I thought it had never happened) in 18 seasons and 1,294 regular season games:  The Angels and Aguas played to a 59-59 OT tie.  Usually, ties are broken by the "bench points"  (we carry an extra QB, kicker, and defense for bye weeks), but this time the bench points were 5 apiece.  Which means with 2 games to go before our playoffs, all 12 teams are either 6-4, 5-5, 4-6... or, in two cases, 5-4-1.  I will have great fun figuring playoff tie-breakers!

BTW, the KCA's win again, 34-8, to be one of those 5-5 teams- the one with a four game winning streak!

ITEM:  Anyone else get this story from FoxNews, where one of the builders of the Obamacare law, an MIT prof named Johnathon Gruber, spoke about the "tortured way" the bill was written in order to a) fool the courts over whether the mandate was a tax or not, b) to make sure it was not only NOT transparent, but too complicated to actually read, and c) to take advantage of the "low information American"...

“This bill was written in a tortured way to make sure CBO did not score the mandate as taxes. If CBO scored the mandate as taxes, the bill dies. Okay, so it’s written to do that. In terms of risk-rated subsidies, if you had a law which said that healthy people are going to pay in – you made explicit healthy people pay in and sick people get money, it would not have passed… Lack of transparency is a huge political advantage. And basically, call it the stupidity of the American voter or whatever, but basically that was really, really critical for the thing to pass… Look, I wish Mark was right that we could make it all transparent, but I’d rather have this law than not.”

Um, excuse me, prof, but I didn't vote for it... Congressmen did.  And I didn't vote for any Congressmen that DID vote for it.  Those that did were Democrat voters- and thus, THEY are the ones you are calling stupid.  And let's look at that last statement, too... you'd willingly do any kind of lying, obfuscation, or legalistic sleight of hand- to get your agenda passed.  THINK ABOUT THAT.  I maybe stupid, but you, sir, and your friends, are a-holes... and I can learn.

Sub in "stupid" for "crazy".

ITEM:  I have to say, I thought Scrappy's little movie yesterday would get more comments.  That's the way the blog bounces, I guess, but Scrappy is mucho upset and wonders if my readers are Iranian.  Why would he think that?  Because of this story:

Dog owners in Iran could face severe penalties for walking their pets in public, under plans proposed by a group of hardline MPs, it's been reported.
Thirty-two MPs have submitted a bill to parliament which proposes a punishment of 74 lashes for people caught playing with, stroking or exercising their dogs outdoors, the US-based Human Rights Activists News Agency (HRANA) reports. The bill says such activities "harm the Islamic culture and the safety and peace of mind of other people, especially women and children". Anyone who ignores police warnings could also be fined up to 100m rials ($3,740 - £2,350) under the plans, as well as having their animal taken away. The MPs say confiscated pets should be moved to "a zoo, forest or desert", and that owners would have to foot the bill for the transfer. Some notable exceptions are mentioned in the bill, including for farmers, shepherds and licensed hunters. 

Okay, I can kinda get Burkhas.  I can see, to an extent, the thing about making cartoons of Mohammed or Allah.  But petting a dog harms the safety and peace of mind of women and children?  Is it any wonder these joyless bastards can't do anything but kill?

You can just see that dog peering into her mind... planting evil thoughts.

By the way, I was just kidding about what Scrappy thought.  That would pre-suppose that Scrappy thinks, and that has never been clearly established.

Down on the riverbank with "Deep thoughts"...

ITEM:  Leave it to Russia to find the perfect way to solve the world's problems forever...

A lawmaker wants to hand out Vladimir Putin's sperm to Russian women en masse in a bid to create a new generation of 'military and political elite'.Yelena Borisovna Mizoulina, the Chairwoman of Parliamentary Commission on women's affairs, children and family, told colleagues that giving the president's sperm to would-be mothers would improve patriotism in Russia.

According to the Russian-language newspaper,Trust, she told the State Duma that Putin's brood would then be given 'special allowances' from the state, in return for their 'devotion' to the country.

She said: 'The essence of my proposition is simple.'Every citizen of Russia will receive by mail the genetic material of the president, to get pregnant from him and have a baby. These mothers will receive a special allowance from the state.'

Ms Mizoulina is infamous for her strange law-making suggestions.She recently recommended that all Russian Jews consider leaving the country, stating: 'We have enough problems'

Earlier this year, she also introduced a bill that banned higher education for young women who had yet to give birth.

I'm conflicted here; is the proper caption, "Please let's not give Debbie Wasserman-Schultz any ideas", or, "That'd be the ONLY way SHE gets Putin-juice"?
ITEM:  Finally, we re-cross the Atlantic to Fort Lee, New Jersey, where residents are crying "Fowl!"  Apparently the local gendarmes were trying to raise awareness of yielding to pedestrians in the crosswalk.  They used a "decoy" pedestrian in order to catch scofflaws, and ticketed a lot of drivers in the course of the event.  And those drivers are a bit P.O.ed about their $230 contributions to the Policeman's Benevolent.  Why, could they not see the decoy?  Not much chance of that... the decoy was an officer in a 9-ft-tall Donald Duck suit!  One lady driver said she thought it was unfair because "it scared me", and thus she ran the crosswalk.  No word as yet if ever litigious Disney Corp. will be sending a lawyer up to Jersey to discuss the matter.


  1. Chris:
    I figured you'd be nicely PO'ed about Gruber and his "stupid" remark.
    Now THERE is a candidate for the town pillory.
    (would want to dirty any water by using the dunking school).

    Leave it to some camel-jockey nation to come up woth that dog "ban"...totally idiotic.
    (and we thought Mohammed and Allah were as user-friendly as the God of Abraham or Jesus...guess NOT, so "we" win that one hands down...pass the pooch, he needs a hug.)
    Putin sperm?
    Man, now THAT is "WTF???" moment there...
    Wouldn't a MONETARY BANK be a better venue to be named after?
    And that "decoy"?
    Didn't know it was a LEO...sure looked more like the MAYOR of Ft.

    Very good (mini) report.
    Stay safe up there, brother.

    1. "Didn't know it was a LEO...sure looked more like the MAYOR of Ft."

      The voice of experience?

  2. I do not know what I would think if I saw Donald Duck crossing the road.

    1. I'd check to see if Mickey or Goofy was behind him.

  3. Oh my goodness- the Donald Duck suit story. Crazy!!
    I pray that all dogs in Iran are treated nice and safe. That makes me very upset about their stupid rules!!

    1. Sounds like unless it's a hunting dog, dogs aren't real popular. Like I said, not surprising for those humorless bastards.

  4. Seems to me there is plenty of stupid to make a full MWN post of this. :)

    Tell Scrappy I've been having computer issues, and even bigger mouse issues (cursor jumping as I was trying to type). I'll head over and check out his video now. :)

    1. Scrappy says you're forgiven. Even if you never tell dog stories.