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What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.


Tuesday, April 26, 2016

The annual A to Z mashup part two

And now, it's time for round two of my A to Z blog challenge mashup, where I solve the problem of being too lazy to join a blog challenge that requires posting on a theme every day for 26 days (weekends off) by accomplishing the same thing (sorta) in two fell swoops.  This year's theme- expressed mathematically as (subject * n [with  n being a letter of the alphabet]) *Google.  This time, the subject is/are the main Presidential candidates, plus the former Marco Rubio and the disgusting eater John Kasich.  Last time, I did A through M; this time, we start at N.

Trump, N- Net worth.  Apparently he and Forbes are battling it out over whether The Donald is worth 4.5 billion or 10 billion.  Me, IDK, but even the low ball number would take me- if I avoided taxes and spent nothing- at my current pay 185,000 years and change to make.

Cruz, O- gave me Cruz OR Trump, which led to ad producer  This superPAC was founded by one Katie Packer, a former Romney strategist who's motto is stand up for principles and fight against Trump.  Which is mildly amusing, since it was Republicans that stood for their principles and stayed home in 2012 that beat Romney.

Hillary, P- Polls.  Which, thank God, even when spelled the other way, didn't combine Hillary and these polls/poles:

Rubio, Q- quotes.  In an effort to be hip and millennial (see "Rubio, X"), during the great filibuster quoted both Jay-Z and Wiz Khalifa.  Imma vote f'that li'l bro', shizz.

Bernie, R- Reddit, where I found this on his reddit:

...and I thought old white guys couldn't jump...

Kasich, S- Slogans.  This took me to a site that had the slogans of all 24 alleged current or former candidates.  I found it the height of creativity that Hillary and Jim Gilmore both came up with the stirring "for America"; and was even less impressed when Bobby Jindahl came up with "Tanned, Rested, and Ready"- and I KNOW where he got that:

And Kasich?  He really put some thought into his- "K for US".  Color me stunned.

Trump, T- Twitter shadowbanning.  Twitter is being accused of hiding posts from a variety of political opinions they don't like, including some Trump videos.  I learned that on the Libertarian Republic, where non-stop popup ads nearly shadowbanned ME.  Long story short, I follow Trump on Twitter for giggles, and if he's being blocked, they don't do the job very well.

Hillary, U- UFOs.  She told Jimmy Fallon that one of the things on her agenda was getting to the bottom of UFOs- although, in true liberal fashion, she wants to change the nomenclature to UAPs- Unexplained Aerial Phenomenon.

Hillary will soon introduce running mate BEM...

Cruz, V- voting record.  As in, not much of one.  While the median votes missed by current senators sitting now is 1.6% for their careers, Ted's is 17.2.  Even in the quarters from January 2013 to his announcement he was running, he was over the median 6 of 9 quarters- and over 10% four of those quarters.  Sounds like a great subject for a "you had one job" meme to me.

Bernie, W- Wife Jane O'Meara Sanders.  As president of Burlington College, a small school with a $2 million budget, she purchased 32 acres for expansion from the local Catholic diocese- for #10 million.  Somewhere towards the "where are we going to get the money to finish paying for this?" end of proceedings in 2011, she was asked to resign.  And in 2013, sometime after the school got an "irresponsible with their money" rating, they cut a deal with the diocese to get out of a lot of it.  This story has the potential to become all-too-familiar...

Rubio, X- as in GenX, of which Buzzfeed called him a GenX fraud, because listening to Tupac and quoting Jay-Z isn't quite enough to make you a hipster.

Kasich, Y- as in Young women, who John doesn't understand.  As one "young lady" found out when she tried to ask him a question at a U of Richmond town hall in October, only to be told, "I don't have any Taylor Swift t-shirts to pass out.

Nothing to do with the post, I know, but it's funny
And finally.....

Trump, Z- Zoolander, which Trump played himself in...

Trump has actually played himself in a handful of films, but only once did he NOT play himself- when He was Waldo's dad in 1994's Little Rascals remake.

How's that for irony?


  1. I THOUGHT Grandma was soft on aliens.

    1. Soft on aliens, hard on humans- particularly the eyes...

  2. Chris:
    I am still trying to figure out WHY I like this so much...must be those MEMES...LOL.
    Hillary IS a bloomim' UAP...HEH!

    Stay safe up there, brother.

    1. You like it so much because of the subliminals...

  3. The Cowardly Lion!!! So funny and very entertaining post for sure.

    1. Thank you, ma'am! It wasn't what I was looking for, but darn funny...

  4. What can one say, well one can say many things like I need to fart, but that isn't something you or anyone else needs to know and yeah that has nothing to do with the post but what the hell I am in a strange mood.

    1. Well, I always thought the comments section is where my followers should feel they can just let 'er rip...

  5. These are funny and depressing as all get-out all at the same time.

    Oh boy. Buckle in, everyone. It's gonna get bumpy. Make that bumpier.

    1. I may have to go back to that slogan thing. It was pretty amusing...