What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.

SOCK IT TO ME BABY!!!

Friday, September 1, 2017

Time Machine co-ordinates VIXVIII4459173



Today we circle September 1st, 1973, and we have a few choice places we could land.  One of them is in Tokyo, where George Foreman defends his heavyweight title in a battle with the first Puerto Rican contender, Joe "King" Roman.  But surely you're joe-king, as Foreman put him on his butt twice and won by KO after just 2 minutes.  So let's fly over to Ann Arbor, MI, where we might bump into some students- literally.  Last spring, the city had instituted a very lenient $5 fine for being busted smoking pot.  The students had taken advantage by having an on-campus "Hash Bash".    That clued the city in that they needed to be tougher, and so the penalties went up.  Undeterred, the students had a back to school "Marijuana Melee"- and five of them got a trip to the lock-up for their efforts.  Hmm... I wonder who's on the undercard?


Damn, that smarts...  wow, things are really spinning fast... Mommy, I hear birdies!


So today on Time Machine we celebrate the start of the third year of the M10 by announcing the top ten for Summer 2017- and it was won by 2 points!  Also, the wrong way to put together a hit record courtesy of Napoleon XIV;  what a 2011 novel about autism and sexual abuse has to do with our 6D victim; and utter chaos on the M10 (well, maybe not utter...)!    Smoke 'em if ya got 'em, and let's go!


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Starting off this week with our one debut- from the act that was the first to spend three weeks on top of the M10 chart!  That would be the French band Phoenix, who came out with a new lp this summer called Ti Amo.  Frankly... I was disappointed with the tunes that they chose for singles.  Way too bubble-gummy, and I like Bubble Gum!  But I worked my way down to the very last track on the lp, and it was my keeper...






Telefono comes in at #10.


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Today, we welcome in POTM Gilbert O'Sullivan for our Panel contestant list for this week.  May I call you Ray?

As long as it isn't the start of a bad comedy bit.

I see on your discography that you were far more successful on the other side of the pond, with seven top tens in the UK and 11 in your native Ireland.

I even had five in the Netherlands!  In America, three.    You people have no taste in music.

The UK top ten has Gary Glitter in it again...

Oooohl right, then, let's have a look at that list.

Jim Croce was at #49 and falling with his big hit, Bad Bad Leroy Brown.

The Stories were at # 3 with Brother Louie.

At this point, I should insert that we had 66 stations and 17 contestants.

Really?  You couldn'ta put that bit in before I started?  Anyway, the #2 song on the American Cashbox chart was Helen Reddy with Delta Dawn.

And here I was, though at 18 and dropping with my hit Get Down.

Always my favorite of yours.

Thank you.  Sly and the Family Stone were at #15 with If You Want Me To Stay.

And- as was previously mentioned- Gary Glitter got the Lorenzo Marquez vote this week with his I'm The Leader Of The Band I Am.  He had been on top of the UK chart...

...among other things...

...just two weeks before, and was at #6 currently.

Marvin Gaye was the US #1 with Let's Get It On.  Another song that was certainly suggestive...

Bit of an age difference, though.

...er, quite.  Wings were at #4 with the Bond theme Live And Let Die.

Paul Simon and the Dixie Hummingbirds were at #9 with Loves Me Like A Rock.

Dobie Gray was peaking at #39 with Loving Arms.

Goodness, the Monster Mash was on the charts again, at 21 and falling after a top ten run.

Shirley Bassey got at least one vote with her song Never Never Never- despite it peaking here last month at #48.

Sir Elton John was at #13 with Saturday Night's All Right For Fighting.

He wasn't a sir yet.

Eh?  He was a Ma'am?

NO.  No, he...

Gotcha on that one, wot?  Anyway, Tony Orlando and Dawn are at #7 with, Say Has Anybody Seen My Sweet Gypsy Rose.


Maureen McGovern had her own movie theme, The Morning After from The Poseidon Adventure, at #22 and also falling.

And finally, Diana Ross, who definitely was a ma'am, was at #6 with Touch Me In The Morning!

Fine job, Ray, thanks for stopping in!

Not a problem... but are you going to tell them why you're calling me Ray?

Nope, they can listen to Clair and figure it out.  Anyway, this week's election had a couple of minor players and a tooth and nail battle between 2 songs for the top.  Take your pick from Marvin Gaye at #1, Helen Reddy at #2, the Stories at #3, Wings at #4, and Diana Ross at #6 for the top spot.  If you pay attention to the rest of the show, I might be nice and whittle ya down to the top 2 later on.


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Jumping into the stat-pack, we have at #101 a re-release of They're Coming To Take Me Away by Napoleon XIV, the single most attacked #1 (on CB) in history.  Napoleon was engineer Jerry Samuels, who happened to be a good buddy of the man who WOULD become Dr Demento.  Samuels had been working on timed ads using a device called a Variable Frequency Oscillator.  Long story short, he discovered that this machine could raise and lower the pitch of a recorded voice without changing the pace- so you wouldn't have to taaaaallllkkkk rrreeeeeaaalll sssslllloooowwww like David Seville on his Chipmunk records.  And Jerry thought with an evil chuckle, there HAS to be a way to make money and have fun with this.

Dr Demento comes into the picture when a stoned Samuels was humming a tune and asked what the hell it was.  "The Campbells Are Coming, an old Scottish song", he was told.  From it he devised the title and then the first verse.

Says Samuels: "It took me 9 months to finish it. I wrote one verse and the chorus, and immediately I realized I was writing a sick joke. So I said, 'This is no good, I'll put it away.' Three months later it was still running through my head; I pulled it out again and wrote the second verse and it was an even sicker joke. Finally about 6 months after that I decided I was going to finish it, and I was going to do something in that last verse that would throw things off a little bit, so I referred to the object - 'They're coming to take me away because of what YOU did - I referred to YOU as a dog. The dog ran away. By doing that I felt I was lightening the sickness of the joke, and I probably was and it probably did some good for me, but that was the reason I went for that afterthought."


So with four tracks to play with, he had to go minimalist.  First track was drums.  He had a buddy try to play the beat- and he sucked.  So bad in fact, he only ever hit the beat right for 7 seconds- and that 7-second loop made the drum track.

Then, he wanted clapping.  He called a bunch of friends to come to the studio- but as it was 2 AM, only three showed up.  Needing more, he suggested they all sit in a circle with the mike in the center and use both hands to slap on their thighs.  Then, to avoid the muffling effect of fabric, he suggested they take their pants off.  Needless to say, what he got was hand clapping, looped three times.

Third track was the siren- a five-dollar hand crank siren overdubbed three times.  Finally he was able to "sing" his part to the three tracks in his headphone- while a buddy ran the VFO to get the desired effects.  And that's how the most offensive non-rap #1 in history was born.


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Quick stat-wrap:  #73 in '73 was Harry Nilsson's As Time Goes By;  The UK #1 was Donny Osmond and Young Love- a single that had peaked here a couple weeks back at #41, fell completely off the Hot 100, and came back this week at #97 just for the occasion.

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And now, the songs of Summer 2017!

10-

...Beach House's #2, Chariot!

9- and #3, for that matter-



...Northern Faces, at 9 with Cops Come, and at #3 with Messin' With Me!


8-   

...Cotton Mather and Girl With A Blue Guitar, another #2 to make the list!

7-  

...another #2, Moon Taxi and Two High!

6- Believe it or not, ANOTHER #2...


...Public Access TV and Monaco!

5- 


...Kidsmoke with And Mine Alone!


4-  

...courtship. with Sunroof!

3 you already know, and #2-  



yet ANOTHER #2, Quiet Hollers and Funny Ways- and at 9 weeks on the chart, it WAS the top song until this week...

And the #1 song of the summer- only appropriate, what with 4 weeks at the top-  


...Foster The People and Sit Next To Me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And the 4 #2s aren't exactly a surprise in a 3-month stretch- especially considering that last year's summer top ten included a pair of #2s (She Makes Me Laugh and 1-2-3) and pair of #3s (You Bring The Summer and First Date)!

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So the novel from 2011, If Thy Right Hand, which combined a mother whose autistic child is accused of sexual abuse with a killer targeting sexual abusers, was written by one Robin Lamont.  Go back in time and you'll see she is- a New York City ADA?  No, go farther yet- she's the lead singer from the original Godspell cast, singing the hit Day By Day!  And it was in a later Godspell production in Toronto that started the careers of Martin Short, Paul Shaffer, and Gilda Radner.  Gilda and Paul kept a connection, and it was when he decided to be the musical director for Gilda's live act soundtrack that John Belushi decided he didn't like it.  Paul, musical director for the Blues Brothers movie, was cut from a part in the movie by a pissed Belushi.  But he did end up playing on their lp from which sprung their last hit, Who's Making Love- which nicked the top 40 in 1980.  That was a cover of the big hit by Johnny Taylor, who was at #5 this week with I Believe In You (You Believe In Me)- but got no Panel love.

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Oh, I forgot to trim it down to two songs, did I?  You thought I didn't see you scrolling past that one part, did you?  Well, go back up and read it RIGHT- and maybe next time you won't try and cheat!

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Anyway, here's the M10:

At 9 we have for a second week the Pom Poms (who were #s 3 and 6 on last year's songs of summer) with Heart In A Suitcase.

At 8, our #2 song of the summer by Quiet Hollers, Funny Ways, slips 4 spots.

Holding at 7 is Howard Jones' Just Look At You Now.

Alvvays- who by the way became only the third act with 4+ M10 hits- moves up 2 to #6 with In Undertow.

Our top song of the Summer, Sit Next To Me, falls 3 to #5.

Also falling is last week's #1- Northern Faces has another one weeker as Cops Come falls to #4.

Wayne, buddy, you might make something of yourself yet!  Mr Newton climbs another 2 to #3 with The Letter.

Zooming to #2 in just 2 weeks is Lucinda Williams with Six Blocks Away.  She's not near six blocks away; in fact she's knocking on the door of...



...The Japanese House, who takes the top spot with Somebody You Found!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


And the Panel?  Well, if you took Wings, Helen Reddy, or Marvin, you are out o'luck, as Ray might say...

No, actually, I wouldn't...

(Just go with it, wouldja?)... but if you took Diana Ross or the Stories, you were in the top 2!  And now, the winner by a 18 (27.2%) to 14 (21.2%) margin...










...The Stories and Brother Louie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Next time 1974... and maybe, IF you're good- the biggest hits of 2 years of M10!

4 comments:

  1. Chris:
    ---1973...ahh, the days when I was a LOT younger (and a lot less wise than I am today)...lol.
    ---Phoenix - good toe-tapper there.
    ---66 STATIONS? WOW!
    ---Got two of those in mind for the top spot...which one, though?
    ---Napoleon the XIV...lol (thought that sounded WAY too familiar).
    "...Where life is beautiful All the time..."
    (btw, that is NOT Fort Wayne...HA!)
    LOVE the "low-tech" aspect to the song's production.
    ---Foster The People is the #1 song of the summer...makes sense (and not a bad choice).
    ---I thought the name Robin Lamont rang a bell (Godspell, no less).
    Didn't know Radner, Short, and Shaffer were attached to a production of the musical.
    ---Good to see The Japanese House and Lucinda Williams at the top, but you GOT ME (twice)with the panel winner...I thought either Ross or Wings...(came SO close, too).

    Very good ride this week.
    (and we didn't even need the A/C on)

    Keep those hits comin' up there, brother.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly the two panel choices Laurie guessed..

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  2. I was never offended by "They're Coming to Take Me Away", but I lean toward political incorrectness anyway. I found the "song" to be interestingly innovative and funny.

    Arlee Bird
    Tossing It Out

    ReplyDelete