Around the world

 

So this time, I'm using a 'random nation generator' to pick me ten nations to observe- so blame it if the stories don't fly...

Gibraltar (yes, I know, not an independent country.)

So I was trying to read a story about an inquiry that was making fresh headlines, but paywall issues led me to dig into it from the back.  Seems that we start with a corruption inquiry after former police commissioner Ian McGrail claimed that someone at the highest reaches of the Rock forced him out of an investigation into a friend of the Chief Minister, and then into early retirement.  Then, as the investigation into McGrail's claims was about to start, these same officials began to try to pass laws allowing it to "Halt public inquiries"- seems a lot like the Dems reactions to DOGE here.  None of which seems to be terribly related to the original story I tried to look at- where, in response to an inquiry from someone in the House of Commons, the UK Ministry of Defense that Gibraltar is "likely the key" to defending Western interests in the Mediterranean. 

If the HoC really needed a 'report' to figure that one out, I begin to see why the UK is in so much turmoil anymore...

Ivory Coast (or, in French, Cote d'Ivoire)

Our subjects here, along with neighboring Senegal, are booting French troops out of their countries.  Why were they there?  To combat (with negligible results) Islamist fundamentalist terror groups.  Why did they fail?  You mean outside of France's 0-for streak in wars since 1871?  How about, "It's hard to prevent terrorists with a straight face when we welcome them to Metropolitan France"?  Y'all need a new Napoleon...

Grok made this for me- Napoleon, Trump, Nixon, and Cleopatra discussing the situation...

The Bahamas

Now here's a front page you really don't want on YOUR doorstep:

-The Police Union claims they aren't getting payouts on their insurance policies since the government is $100 Million behind on their premiums...

- Traffic deaths, suicides both up last year...

- Plus, murders up 9%...

-Plus, complaints about those un-insured cops are up 114% last year...

-Plus, despite efforts both inside and outside the country, the government does not consider marital rape a crime...

-AND a woman will be going to trial for throwing acid on her brother and his girlfriend (sorry, no other juicy details)...

Austria

Definitely the most aggravating to find so far.  First, a web search refuses to give you a legit, from-the-country website.  You have to fight your way to one. Even on BBC World, where I used to find news sites on their "country profiles", when I tried this, clearly typing "Austria Country Profile", I get profiles for Croatia and Poland instead.  Finally finding the Weiner Zeitung (Vienna Times) site, I find nothing but stories about 'fake news'- oh, and the travails of editor Verena Franke, who had all but signed the deal to buy her first house- only to find out that she needed life insurance, and because she's a type 1 diabetic, nobody but nobody would insure her.  Here she might could sue- there, maybe not so much.

Germany

In an apparent attempt of influencing German elections, Russian agents vandalized 270+ cars in 3 German states and Berlin.  Trying to make it look like the Green Party did the deed, they filled exhaust pipes with expanding construction foam.

Stickers were then left on the damaged cars depicting Vice-Chancellor Robert Habeck, the Green Party's chancellor candidate in the upcoming federal election, and bearing the message: "Be greener!"

Of course, if environmentalists weren't touring Europe splashing paint and cheez-whiz on priceless paintings to "make their points", no one would have fell for the scam.  Sometimes you reap the whirlwind, kids.

Chile

In what may have been our first contestant for "World's stupidest criminal, the Catholic Church defrocked priest Tulio Soto Manquimilla for conduct unbecoming.  Included in his offenses...

The now former priest of the archdiocese of Puerto Montt, Manquemilla had been under investigation since 2018 after a series of irregularities came to light. Soto had hired himself to increase his salary and lent Church money to individuals. The transactions were even documented before a notary public, which made auditing easier.

Hires himself, to increase his salary...  Wonder if Pelosi figured that scam out...

US Virgin Islands (again, not an independent, and possibly not a virgin)

A  19- year old went on an 11-day, 4 robbery spree, ending in, of all places, a K-Mart.  Day one,  Tyshaune Rey Jr, started out robbing a jewelry store- but from there, he devolved in his choices. Six days later, it was a McDonalds; then a liquor store, before finally being apprehended on one of the few K-Marts left on earth.  He's being held in lieu of $135 K bail.  

Fun fact- there are 4 full-out K-Marts left on earth; 3 in the USVI, one in Guam.

Comoros

In a lame attempt (IMHO) of doing you-know-what down one's leg, President Azali Assoumani has had his 'deputy secretary-general' explain how, when he said he planned on passing the office down to his son, he really didn't mean his 'son', exactly...

Hafi (the DSG) stressed that Assoumani was speaking in metaphorical terms of his future successor and that to report otherwise was "misinformation".

"He [Assoumain] spoke of a son in terms of his three families: his political family, his government family and his nuclear family...In 2029, he will choose, within the framework of the party, a child of the party to run for the universal suffrage of the Comorian people," Hafi went on.

Togo

Not a lot to choose from in this tiny splinter of a country, so when I saw...

Lomé will host the third edition of the "Les Afropéennes" festival from February 20 to 23, 2025

...I said, please tell me that "Afropeennes" is going to be something dirty, or at least interesting..." Nope, just an art festival.

And, finally- perhaps mercifully...

Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

At least they had interesting news, if not exactly ripe for my spin news.  Still once again I had hopes when I saw the headline:

NLM to Host March & Rally Against Social Injustice in Layou

And I'm like, is this their version of Black Lives Matter?  If so, what is the "N"? Nematodes? Neptunians? Navigators? (They were talking about regattas coming up in April in another article).  But no- it was the National Liberation Movement- apparently a new political party...

The National Liberation Movement (NLM) is pleased to introduce itself to you as the true voice for economic, transformative, social and political change built on principles of Meritocracy, Pragmatism, Integrity, Accountability, Transparency and Equity.

They are a "third party" outfit, splitting the difference between the moderate conservatives on one side and 'democratic' socialists on the other.  I had to laugh a little bit about the Dem-soc's party acronym- The Unity Labor Party, or "ULP"...

Grok comes through for me again...I think I have just gained a new super power...