Posts
I admit to being confused and bemused when a customer going by the handle of "val" seemingly responded to last night's "What Is Hell" post on the comments to Friday's Time Machine. As I read the response, and the website He/she linked to, I can see how it made "perfect sense" to put it on Time Machine ( ;<0 ). Here is the response:
val said...
I would like to invite you to read a special gift from the wilderness Rev 12:6...Not one child of God will be put in a hell fire no matter what their sins. It never entered the heart or mind of God to ever do such a thing and I prove it by the word of God at http://minigoodtale.wordpress.com. The true Gospel (Gospel means Good Tale) now delivered Rev 12:5, 13 sets all free as a witness.
Yeah, just about as confusing on this website as well. The gist of the website starts with the logical fallacy I show you here:
John 3:16 all will believe, each in their own order 1 Cor 15:23.
*Rom 14:11-12 For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God. 12 So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.
*1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
ALL WILL CONFESS! All will be cleansed from all unrighteousness each in their own order (Isa 1:18).
Get it? If at the coming of Christ every knee shall bow and every tongue confess, and confession merits salvation, then this final confession lets everyone into heaven. Failing to take into account that, according to Revelation 22, by this time their confession falls on deaf ears:
10 Then he told me, “Do not seal up the words of the prophecy of this scroll, because the time is near. 11 Let the one who does wrong continue to do wrong; let the vile person continue to be vile; let the one who does right continue to do right; and let the holy person continue to be holy.”
But building on this misconception, he/she totally verges off the original meaning of the scripture:
*Ps 89:46 How long, LORD? wilt thou hide thyself for ever? shall thy wrath burn like fire?.
God’s emotions are as a fire. Our emotions burn inside us also. All souls will be consumed by the word of God. Everyone will be very emotional when they are in front of the judgment seat of God. They will be in the hot seat. They will be devoured in Love, understanding, forgiveness and mercy because he has directed all of our lives Pro 16:9.
Because we are all going to heaven, the fire that the wicked are to be burned in is a fire of emotions. Val, I hate to tell you, but treating the Word Of God as an allegory when it is meant to be interpreted literally is what got Harold Camping looking like an idiot. Re-read- if indeed you read it- my original post on the subject. I researched the the word meanings through Strong's concordance to see what I would find (rather than "finding" what I was looking for, as you appear to be doing). God's word leaves absolutely no doubt on two points. The first you are correct on- there is no condemnation and no second death for the Child Of God. The second, in which you are sorely mistaken, is that some will alienate themselves from God and merit eternal damnation- a damnation that is called "the second death" and will include the fiery emotion you spoke of, but it will be righteous anger and not love, as well as physical and mental punishment beyond our capacity to understand.
Anyone can find a group of random and misapplied verses such as you have to make any twisted point they want. As an example, I point out to you that you WILL NOT FIND A LIE in what Satan said to Eve in Genesis 3:4. And in Matthew 4, he never misquoted scripture. Do yourself a favor and research the subject of Hell and Eternal damnation, as I did. Then perhaps it would behoove you to take a heartfelt look at Galatians 1:8:
But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach a gospel other than the one we preached to you, let him be eternally condemned!
Or Rev.22:18:
18I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: If anyone adds anything to them, God will add to him the plagues described in this book. 19And if anyone takes words away from this book of prophecy, God will take away from him his share in the tree of life and in the holy city, which are described in this book.
God is indeed a God of Love. That is why He sent His Son, a part of the totality that is Himself, and suffered Him to die on the cross for our sins. If your theory is correct, then God intends to lower the bar and Christ died for NO REASON. Jesus does not forgive our sins in the sense of, "you pushed me down in the playground, but that's okay"; He forgives them in the sense that HE PAID FOR THEM. Thus, when an actual Child of God goes before the throne, God opens the ledger and finds the account marked paid. God DOES NOT FORGIVE SINS AT THE JUDGEMENT SEAT, as you suggest; if you are a child of God, those sins were wiped away at Calvary. And if you are a sinner at the end of time, you can bow all you want and Christ will say," 'I don't know you or where you come from. Away from me, all you evildoers!'" (Luke 13:27)
And the woman of Revelation 12 (which is expressly described as a sign, or allegory) is the Hebrew people, and the travails they will face after the Church is raptured; what you were getting at, I haven't a clue.
(BTW, my friends: "val" neither has a public blogger profile nor any attempt at one on his/her page. Makes me wonder why he's/she's hiding under a basket.)
Monday, June 6, 2011
Sunday, June 5, 2011
What is Hell?
Let me start off by defining this as a musing, not a "lesson" or a "sermon." The subject of what awaits the damned was brought to my curiosity this morning by my reading at the beginning of 2 Thessalonians, and with the recent discussion as to Hell's existence, I thought it wise to see what, if any evidence there was for a final damnation of utter annihilation. I found none.
What I did find gave me a clearer- and curious- picture of the idea of Hell we might glean from the Bible. I'm not going to put references in, other than to say that I was cross-checking words to Strong's Exhaustive Concordance, and if you want raw numbers, that is the place to go. I recommend downloading E-Sword to help you in this and many other things (although this particular task I did low-tech).
First off, Hell is basically connected in the Greek to Hades and in Hebrew to Sheol. There I found the base word had, among its uses, the concept of inquiring, demanding, even lusting. As if Hell was a place designed to suck a sinner in, like a demonic black hole. As I went on, I began to see how ironic that interpretation was.
Job gives us the concept of Hell being a place extreme from Heaven (11:8) as well as being linked to the almost-physical place called Destruction (26:6) which could be interpreted (by someone with a comic book mind) as the "death of no escape".
In Jeremiah's description of the judgement in the Valley of Hinnom, we divine that is a result of the utter alienation of oneself from God through idolatry, human "logic", and pleasure seeking. (Chapter 19, if you will.) It's attributes include the failure of human wisdom, the complete loss of dignity and hope, and utter desolation and despair, made a "hissing"- a mark of derision- by all who escape.
I found that Matthew's references to the outer darkness ( or "obscurity") meshed with a word he used for Hell which carried among its meanings the concept of "unseen". The parable of the rich man and Lazarus gives us a Hades that is remote and cut off from Paradise; in the final analysis, it will also be cut off from sight. Not surprising: if our reward is to involve the end of our tears, then it would seem to involve the cutting off of contact from that (or those) which made us cry- or would give us reason to mourn.
Unlike those who claim there is nothing but atomization for the damned soul, the Word gives us plenty of examples of physical punishment, all of which are prefaced with the phrase "everlasting" or "eternal". Among them is the concept of eternal incarceration in 2 Peter 2, eternal punishment (translating to "infliction") in Matthew, and the lovely thought of "the worm dying not" and the never extinguished fire. And significant here is the term "fire".
The word commonly used for "fire" as relating to Hell (as opposed to the one for the common campfire) has a specific use in "lightning". What does that mean for the damned? Consider: the run-of-the-mill blow torch hits around 2400 ° F. The surface of the sun is in the 10-12,000 ° F range. Lightning tips the scales at about 60,000 ° F. In other words, there is a vast conceptual difference between Hell fire and earthly fire.
And before I get into the physicality of things, I want to step back to that word "everlasting". Both it and "eternal" as used here carry the (possible ) interpretation of reaching both endlessly into the future AND into the past. Is rejection of God a retroactive thing to beyond even creation and genesis? A valid philosophical question, but I suspect a moot one to the damned.
And finally, I'd like to look at the description of Hell given by Paul in Romans 2:8-9, to wit:
8But unto them that are contentious, and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath,
9Tribulation and anguish, upon every soul of man that doeth evil, of the Jew first, and also of the Gentile;
Note two sets of two words in the description. First, Indignation and Wrath. When you look up the various words used elsewhere translated thus as well as the two specific words, you see that they are very nearly interchangeable; in fact each one is translated as the other word in other verses. The specific for indignation has a strong tie (through the use of breathing in its extremity) to an anger that directs itself from God to the soul of the damned, in fact, the concept of immolation also ties in in a way that you could (facetiously) say that God was so mad at the soul He was "breathing fire". The specific of wrath somewhat loses the soul/breath connotation but picks of more of an anger of the mind- an abhorrence so fierce that the root for such a passion gave rise to (the non-sexual meaning of) our word "orgy". Thus this first part of the description deals with the mind and the soul of the damned.
The remaining pair are quite different. Linked by meaning like indignation and wrath, tribulation and anguish turn to the physical aspects. (And if you haven't been making a list since I mentioned irony before, start taking notes.) Tribulation comes from a root that connotes a pressure, or a crowding. Anguish- and this is not the same word used for when a run of the mill person has anguish- is a combination of roots, combining to the concept of having a narrowed room to move. Specifically, unlike other forms of the word that imply restraint being used to do the narrowing, this words specific narrowing is caused by the presence of surrounding obstacles, narrowing to the point of physical crushing.
Am I saying Hell is a literal or figurative black hole? Though you might draw that from what I've found, it's not my point. My points are these:
Hell is an actual place where actual sinner are body-and-soul punished.
Hell is as separated from Heaven and the eyes of the blessed as it can be.
Hell has no escape.
Hell is the consequence of alienation from God.
Hell is not annihilation; it is incarceration and punishment.
The scale of said punishment is beyond earthly comprehensions of pain and time.
The punishments will have spiritual, mental, AND physical aspects.
If those points sound a lot like a black hole, then here is yet another lesson learned from the evidences all around us (Romans 1:20: "For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse") : The bright and shiny molecules, the particles of light, escaping from the demanding clutches of the event horizon, whilst the others, turning from the light, are sentenced to an eternity of crushing, in a place where man's theories no longer apply, and are lost to sight forever.
What I did find gave me a clearer- and curious- picture of the idea of Hell we might glean from the Bible. I'm not going to put references in, other than to say that I was cross-checking words to Strong's Exhaustive Concordance, and if you want raw numbers, that is the place to go. I recommend downloading E-Sword to help you in this and many other things (although this particular task I did low-tech).
First off, Hell is basically connected in the Greek to Hades and in Hebrew to Sheol. There I found the base word had, among its uses, the concept of inquiring, demanding, even lusting. As if Hell was a place designed to suck a sinner in, like a demonic black hole. As I went on, I began to see how ironic that interpretation was.
Job gives us the concept of Hell being a place extreme from Heaven (11:8) as well as being linked to the almost-physical place called Destruction (26:6) which could be interpreted (by someone with a comic book mind) as the "death of no escape".
In Jeremiah's description of the judgement in the Valley of Hinnom, we divine that is a result of the utter alienation of oneself from God through idolatry, human "logic", and pleasure seeking. (Chapter 19, if you will.) It's attributes include the failure of human wisdom, the complete loss of dignity and hope, and utter desolation and despair, made a "hissing"- a mark of derision- by all who escape.
I found that Matthew's references to the outer darkness ( or "obscurity") meshed with a word he used for Hell which carried among its meanings the concept of "unseen". The parable of the rich man and Lazarus gives us a Hades that is remote and cut off from Paradise; in the final analysis, it will also be cut off from sight. Not surprising: if our reward is to involve the end of our tears, then it would seem to involve the cutting off of contact from that (or those) which made us cry- or would give us reason to mourn.
Unlike those who claim there is nothing but atomization for the damned soul, the Word gives us plenty of examples of physical punishment, all of which are prefaced with the phrase "everlasting" or "eternal". Among them is the concept of eternal incarceration in 2 Peter 2, eternal punishment (translating to "infliction") in Matthew, and the lovely thought of "the worm dying not" and the never extinguished fire. And significant here is the term "fire".
The word commonly used for "fire" as relating to Hell (as opposed to the one for the common campfire) has a specific use in "lightning". What does that mean for the damned? Consider: the run-of-the-mill blow torch hits around 2400 ° F. The surface of the sun is in the 10-12,000 ° F range. Lightning tips the scales at about 60,000 ° F. In other words, there is a vast conceptual difference between Hell fire and earthly fire.
And before I get into the physicality of things, I want to step back to that word "everlasting". Both it and "eternal" as used here carry the (possible ) interpretation of reaching both endlessly into the future AND into the past. Is rejection of God a retroactive thing to beyond even creation and genesis? A valid philosophical question, but I suspect a moot one to the damned.
And finally, I'd like to look at the description of Hell given by Paul in Romans 2:8-9, to wit:
8But unto them that are contentious, and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath,
9Tribulation and anguish, upon every soul of man that doeth evil, of the Jew first, and also of the Gentile;
Note two sets of two words in the description. First, Indignation and Wrath. When you look up the various words used elsewhere translated thus as well as the two specific words, you see that they are very nearly interchangeable; in fact each one is translated as the other word in other verses. The specific for indignation has a strong tie (through the use of breathing in its extremity) to an anger that directs itself from God to the soul of the damned, in fact, the concept of immolation also ties in in a way that you could (facetiously) say that God was so mad at the soul He was "breathing fire". The specific of wrath somewhat loses the soul/breath connotation but picks of more of an anger of the mind- an abhorrence so fierce that the root for such a passion gave rise to (the non-sexual meaning of) our word "orgy". Thus this first part of the description deals with the mind and the soul of the damned.
The remaining pair are quite different. Linked by meaning like indignation and wrath, tribulation and anguish turn to the physical aspects. (And if you haven't been making a list since I mentioned irony before, start taking notes.) Tribulation comes from a root that connotes a pressure, or a crowding. Anguish- and this is not the same word used for when a run of the mill person has anguish- is a combination of roots, combining to the concept of having a narrowed room to move. Specifically, unlike other forms of the word that imply restraint being used to do the narrowing, this words specific narrowing is caused by the presence of surrounding obstacles, narrowing to the point of physical crushing.
Am I saying Hell is a literal or figurative black hole? Though you might draw that from what I've found, it's not my point. My points are these:
Hell is an actual place where actual sinner are body-and-soul punished.
Hell is as separated from Heaven and the eyes of the blessed as it can be.
Hell has no escape.
Hell is the consequence of alienation from God.
Hell is not annihilation; it is incarceration and punishment.
The scale of said punishment is beyond earthly comprehensions of pain and time.
The punishments will have spiritual, mental, AND physical aspects.
If those points sound a lot like a black hole, then here is yet another lesson learned from the evidences all around us (Romans 1:20: "For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse") : The bright and shiny molecules, the particles of light, escaping from the demanding clutches of the event horizon, whilst the others, turning from the light, are sentenced to an eternity of crushing, in a place where man's theories no longer apply, and are lost to sight forever.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
...and a hero comes home
For those who don't follow Pat Miller's show on WOWO, you might not know who Lance Corporal Brandon Long is.
Brandon, seen here at Arlington, is a man who lost his legs for our freedom. Today, at 12:35, he came home. A motorcycle and police escort was to bring him up to the American Legion post in Leo to celebrate his return, and Pat, being a good patriot, put out the word for us to come out and either join in the celebration or be there for the procession. The route ran past the Walgreens near us, so Laurie, Scrappy, and I sat along Clinton streets in temperatures near 107 F (according to Dwenger's electronic signboard; time and temp said 91), and were eventually joined by another flag waving couple and a pair of bystanders who decided to show respect although they had no idea what exactly was going on (remember when it was common to show respect in such situations?).
At exactly 2 pm, they came through. Brandon, on the back of a three wheeler early in the procession, was part of a train of cycles and family and emergency vehicles that- going at speeds of I'm guessing 40-50 mph- took a full 6 MINUTES for JUST the cycles to go by. And they were waving back at us, taking pictures, blowing horns and sirens. Scrappy, although exhausted fro the semi-picnic and walk we had just took at Shoaff, barked and ran around, and Laurie almost cried. This, Hanoi Jane, is how you are SUPPOSED to treat those that give their lives for your freedom.
Corporal, I salute you once again. Thank you for your terrible sacrifice and your wonderful service, your tremendous courage and your brave heart. And welcome home.
And Dodge City fades away...
Funny how they always said that Remmington Steele gained its popularity because of the sexual tension between the two main characters that was never resolved. Once it was, the show went down and swiftly out. In a way, that was Gunsmoke, too- except that for 20 years, it never was resolved. It was as if Matt and Kitty were the two pillars that held the town/the show up- to move them would collapse it all. Back then, we would have rather seen the house stand than the love resolved. "Those were different times, those were different days."
Matt Dillon was like Spock on Star Trek, or Vision in the Mighty Avengers- somewhat aloof, keeping his own counsel, calm in the face of anything. He was Captain America- totally human, yet totally reliable. You felt you could tell him a joke at the Long Branch, yet would wilt under his glare if you dropped a gum wrapper in the street. And nobody could have pulled that off near as well as Jim Arness.
The actor was 32 when friend John Wayne declined the lead role in "Gunsmoke" and recommended Arness instead. Afraid of being typecast, Arness initially rejected it.
"Go ahead and take it, Jim," Wayne urged him. "You're too big for pictures. Guys like Gregory Peck and I don't want a big lug like you towering over us. Make your mark in television."
I'm not going to dig up his whole life on here; you can do that on your own. But I will share with you what he said himself, on his own fansite:
Hi friends,
I decided to write a letter to you for Janet to post on our website in the event I was no longer here.
I had a wonderful life and was blessed with some many loving people and great friends. The best part of my life was my family, especially my wife Janet. Many of you met her at Dodge City so you understand what a special person she is.
I wanted to take this time to thank all of you for the many years of being a fan of Gunsmoke, The Thing, How the West Was Won and all the other fun projects I was lucky enough to have been allowed to be a part of. I had the privilege of working with so many great actors over the years.
I was honored to have served in the army for my country. I was at Anzio during WWII and it makes you realize how very precious life is.
Thank you again for all the many letters, cards, emails and gifts we received from you over the years. You are and always have been truly appreciated.
Sincerely,
Jim Arness
Just as Gunsmoke was the last survivor of the TV western, Jim was the last survivor of the core group on the show. Kitty- Amanda Blake- died in 1989 at the age of 60. Festus- Ken Curtis- passed in 1991 at the age of 74. Milburn Stone- Doc- died in 1980 at the age of 75. Even of the rest- Dennis Weaver (Chester) died in 2006 and Glenn Strange (Sam the bartender) while the show was still filming in 1973- only Buck Taylor (Newly) outlasted Jim. The Matt-Doc-Festus dynamic is still copied in so many show, but never truly duplicated.
I'm sure now that some Hollywood copycat will now think a new, revamped Gunsmoke will make a great movie- Kitty will be a madam rather than a businesswoman, Festus might well be a drug addict, and Doc will be an anachronistic figure embittered by being past his prime. And of course, Matt will have his choice of scantily clad women- and he will choose often. And people who never knew the original will say, "how stupid, why would anyone watch this crap!"
But I won't be watching. I'll be at home whistling the closing theme- if I can...
Friday, June 3, 2011
Step into my time machine week fifty-eight
This week on Time Machine- quite possibly the stupidest story I've ever told here, a story of extreme over reaction and the problems inherent in giving decision-making power to the uninformed. And no, it has nothing to do with the election of Barack Obama.
Even as I continue to shake my head (literally), I begin this week's show with the mention that we had 18 songs debut in the hot 100, many of which I could mention and we'd all stare blankly. There are seven of these which deserve notation. George Benson comes in at 91 with the song that did more than anything to open me up to soft jazz, the Grammy-winning This Masquerade. At 82 is a cover you might not remember, but I do- Todd Rundgren doing his take on the Beach Boys' top dog Good Vibrations. Next at 81 comes Tavares with the perky Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel. At 71 Aerosmith hits with Last Child. The Carpenters have one of their last really pretty hits with I Need To Be In Love coming in at 67. And irony at 61 and 60- two classic bands, rivals throughout the sixties, beginning their journey together. At 61 was the Beach Boys with their cover of Chuck Berry's Rock And Roll Music; at 60, the Beatles with Got To Get You Into My Life.
The big mover was Queen's You're My Best Friend, climbing 22 from 77 to 55 (and in more Irony, Dream On by Aerosmith drops out this week, and the new occupant of the grandpa chair is Bohemian Rhapsody); the big dropper is Only Sixteen, which actually drops only thirteen, from 33 to 46.
We are now in the land of being up to date on the #1 albums of the seventies- and it will be 8 weeks before we hit one I haven't featured yet. This week's album top dog is the second coming of the Rolling Stones' Black And Blue, which took a week off last week in favor of Wings At The Speed Of Sound. This makes B&B's third non-continuous week on top.
Two almost but not quite mentions this week. Paul Simon peaked at 45 on our chart (and 40 on Billboard) with the title track to Still Crazy After All These Years- a song that certainly did better here in the Summit City than nationally. At 17 is where Neil Sedaka peaked last week with Love In The Shadows, a song whose UK b-side was Love Will Keep Us Together (which I mention again for irony's sake; his previous hit, the slow version of Breaking Up Is Hard To Do, was backed by Lonely Nights/Angel Face. Still wonder why Toni Tennille slipped "Sedaka's back" in at the end of Love Will Keep Us Together?)
We have 5 count em five top 40 debuts this week. Coming in at 40, up 7, is the 9th of 11 top 40s for America, Today Is The Day. Making a 16-notch leap to #39 is Irish band Thin Lizzy with The Boys Are Back In Town, their one and only top forty (which surprised me, because Jailbreak gets a lot of AOR play). At 37, up 20, is John Travolta with Let Her In, the first of 4 trips to the top 40 for him. Coming in at #35, up 8, are the Brothers Johnson with I'll Be Good To You, the first of 4 top 40s and first of three R&B chart #1s. And jumping 17 notches to #24, the Starland Vocal Band with their one and only trip to the top 40, Afternoon Delight.
Our look at the number ones of other years rolls into the 7s this week. 1997 was after Cashbox shut down; the #1 this week on Billboard that year was the Hanson brothers with MMMBop. This was a song that I had to admit I never heard, so I gave it a listen. Though far from #1 material IMHO, it was catchy. 1987 had at the top Atlantic Starr with Always (which I didn't think I knew till I listened, and then said, "Oh, that's Atlantic Starr!? I knew Secret Lovers, but...). Next year at this time (i.e. 1977) KC And The Sunshine Band are on top with I'm Your Boogie Man. Skipping ahead (or behind, if you prefer) to 1957, Elvis was just wrapping up an 8-week stay with All Shook Up. And that brings us to 1967- or 2001- and the stupid story.
The #1 song on Cashbox this week in 1967 was I Got Rhythm by the Happenings. And in looking at the story, I saw that one of their other big hits- See You In September- was part of a very dubious list. Right after the September 11th attack, Clear Channel Communications released a list of 165 songs that they felt might be inappropriate to play because of the disaster. Though they later denied the existence of such a list, they were outed by a newsletter Hits Daily Double, and the list's existence was later confirmed on Snopes.com. What kind of songs made this blacklist? Well there seemed to be 10 main categories. And allow me to highlight the real stretches.
First, songs that obviously had something to do with destruction. Examples: AC/'DC -Dirty Deeds, Shot Down In Flames; Gap Band- You Dropped A Bomb On Me; John Mellencamp- Crumblin' Down; Edwin Starr (and Bruce Springsteen's cover)- War.
Second, apocalyptic references: REM- It's The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine); Zager and Evans- In The Year 2525; Nena- 99 Balloons; Barry McGwire- Eve Of Destruction; Everclear- Santa Monica (Watch the World Die); Skeeter Davis- The End Of The World.
Third, anything to do with fire: Blue Oyster Cult-Burning For You; Boston- Smokin'; Jerry Lee Lewis- Great Balls Of Fire; John Mellancamp- Paper In Fire; James Taylor- Fire And Rain; Trammps- Disco Inferno; Talking Heads-Burning Down The House.
Fourth, anything to do with death: J Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers- Last Kiss; Queen- Another One Bites The Dust and Killer Queen; Paper Lace- The Night Chicago Died; Don McLean- American Pie; Wings- Live And Let Die; Billy Joel- Only The Good Die Young; Bobby Darin- Mack The Knife; Bob Dylan (or Guns and Roses) - Knocking On Heaven's Door; Beatles - A Day In The Life; Alice In Chains- Rooster; Blood Sweat and Tears- And When I Die; Norman Greenbaum- Spirit In The Sky; John Lennon- Imagine.
Fifth, anything to do with airplanes: Beatles- Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds; Phil Collins- In The Air Tonight; CCR- Travellin' Band; Neil Diamond- America; Elton John- Bennie And The Jets, Daniel, and Rocket Man;Steve Miller- Jet Airliner; John Parr- Man In Motion; Peter Paul And Mary- Leaving On A Jet Plane; Red Hot Chili Peppers- Aeroplane.
Sixth, missing persons: Three Degrees- When Will I See You Again; Zombies- She's Not There; Lynyrd Skynyrd- Tuesday's Gone; Los Bravos- Black Is Black; Chi-Lites- Have You Seen Her.
Seventh, anything to do with New York City: Ad Libs- Boy From NYC; the Drifters- On Broadway; Martha and the Vandellas- Dancing In The Street; Frank Sinatra- New York, New York.
Eighth-Any title that could possibly be misconstrued: U2-Sunday Bloody Sunday; Van Halen- Jump (but not the Pointer Sisters?) ; Steam- Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye; Pretenders- My City Was Gone; Brooklyn Bridge- Worst That Could Happen; Carole King- I Feel The Earth Move; Dio- Holy Diver; the Clash- Rock the Casbah; Petula Clark- A Sign Of The Times; Black Sabbath- War Pigs; Pat Benatar- Love Is A Battlefield and Hit Me With Your Best Shot; Fontella Bass -Rescue Me; Bangles- Walk Like An Egyptian; Animals- We've Got To Get Out Of This Place; DC5- Bits And Pieces(someone had a sick sense of humor on this one); Surfaris- Wipeout.
Ninth, demonic mentions- AC/DC - Hell's Bells and Highway To Hell; Elvis, Devil In Disguise; Mitch Ryder and the Detroit Wheels- Devil With The Blue Dress On; Santana- Evil Ways.
And finally, ones I just have to scratch my head over ( as if that isn't the whole list): Cat Stevens- Morning Has Broken and Peace Train; Simon And Garfunkel- Bridge Over Troubled Water; Rolling Stones- Ruby Tuesday; Youngbloods- Get Together; Red Hot Chili Peppers- Under The Bridge; Peter Paul And Mary- Blowing In The Wind; Peter and Gordon- A World Without Love; Ricky Nelson- Travellin' Man; Led Zeppelin- Stairway To Heaven; Kansas -Dust In The Wind; Hollies - He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother; Shelley Fabres- Johnny Angel; Jackson Browne-Doctor My Eyes; Beatles- Obla-Di-Obla -Da and Ticket To Ride; and the topper of all- both Satchmo's and Sam Cooke's versions of What A Wonderful World.
(Note: consider the entirety of cats 9 and 10 highlighted.)
Shaking your head yet? Fine. Time to get on with the countdown.
Two songs come into the top ten, two fall out. Dropping are Rhiannon, from 9 to 11, and Fooled Around And Fell In Love, from 8 to 13.
Entering the top ten at 10, up one, are the Stones from the #1 album with Fool To Cry. Up 4 to #9 are the captain and the ever-lovely Tennille with Shop Around. Sara Smile moves two to #8 for Hall And Oates. Henry Gross slips two to 7 with Shannon. Holding at #6 are Pratt and McLain with Happy days. Dorothy Moore rises a pair to 5 with Misty Blue. John Sebastian, leader of the TV theme invasion, slips to #4 with former top dog Welcome Back. Silver Convention edges up a notch to #3 with Get Up And Boogie. At #2, up one for Diana Ross and Love Hangover. And hanging on to the top spot for a second week-
Even as I continue to shake my head (literally), I begin this week's show with the mention that we had 18 songs debut in the hot 100, many of which I could mention and we'd all stare blankly. There are seven of these which deserve notation. George Benson comes in at 91 with the song that did more than anything to open me up to soft jazz, the Grammy-winning This Masquerade. At 82 is a cover you might not remember, but I do- Todd Rundgren doing his take on the Beach Boys' top dog Good Vibrations. Next at 81 comes Tavares with the perky Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel. At 71 Aerosmith hits with Last Child. The Carpenters have one of their last really pretty hits with I Need To Be In Love coming in at 67. And irony at 61 and 60- two classic bands, rivals throughout the sixties, beginning their journey together. At 61 was the Beach Boys with their cover of Chuck Berry's Rock And Roll Music; at 60, the Beatles with Got To Get You Into My Life.
The big mover was Queen's You're My Best Friend, climbing 22 from 77 to 55 (and in more Irony, Dream On by Aerosmith drops out this week, and the new occupant of the grandpa chair is Bohemian Rhapsody); the big dropper is Only Sixteen, which actually drops only thirteen, from 33 to 46.
We are now in the land of being up to date on the #1 albums of the seventies- and it will be 8 weeks before we hit one I haven't featured yet. This week's album top dog is the second coming of the Rolling Stones' Black And Blue, which took a week off last week in favor of Wings At The Speed Of Sound. This makes B&B's third non-continuous week on top.
Two almost but not quite mentions this week. Paul Simon peaked at 45 on our chart (and 40 on Billboard) with the title track to Still Crazy After All These Years- a song that certainly did better here in the Summit City than nationally. At 17 is where Neil Sedaka peaked last week with Love In The Shadows, a song whose UK b-side was Love Will Keep Us Together (which I mention again for irony's sake; his previous hit, the slow version of Breaking Up Is Hard To Do, was backed by Lonely Nights/Angel Face. Still wonder why Toni Tennille slipped "Sedaka's back" in at the end of Love Will Keep Us Together?)
We have 5 count em five top 40 debuts this week. Coming in at 40, up 7, is the 9th of 11 top 40s for America, Today Is The Day. Making a 16-notch leap to #39 is Irish band Thin Lizzy with The Boys Are Back In Town, their one and only top forty (which surprised me, because Jailbreak gets a lot of AOR play). At 37, up 20, is John Travolta with Let Her In, the first of 4 trips to the top 40 for him. Coming in at #35, up 8, are the Brothers Johnson with I'll Be Good To You, the first of 4 top 40s and first of three R&B chart #1s. And jumping 17 notches to #24, the Starland Vocal Band with their one and only trip to the top 40, Afternoon Delight.
Our look at the number ones of other years rolls into the 7s this week. 1997 was after Cashbox shut down; the #1 this week on Billboard that year was the Hanson brothers with MMMBop. This was a song that I had to admit I never heard, so I gave it a listen. Though far from #1 material IMHO, it was catchy. 1987 had at the top Atlantic Starr with Always (which I didn't think I knew till I listened, and then said, "Oh, that's Atlantic Starr!? I knew Secret Lovers, but...). Next year at this time (i.e. 1977) KC And The Sunshine Band are on top with I'm Your Boogie Man. Skipping ahead (or behind, if you prefer) to 1957, Elvis was just wrapping up an 8-week stay with All Shook Up. And that brings us to 1967- or 2001- and the stupid story.
The #1 song on Cashbox this week in 1967 was I Got Rhythm by the Happenings. And in looking at the story, I saw that one of their other big hits- See You In September- was part of a very dubious list. Right after the September 11th attack, Clear Channel Communications released a list of 165 songs that they felt might be inappropriate to play because of the disaster. Though they later denied the existence of such a list, they were outed by a newsletter Hits Daily Double, and the list's existence was later confirmed on Snopes.com. What kind of songs made this blacklist? Well there seemed to be 10 main categories. And allow me to highlight the real stretches.
First, songs that obviously had something to do with destruction. Examples: AC/'DC -Dirty Deeds, Shot Down In Flames; Gap Band- You Dropped A Bomb On Me; John Mellencamp- Crumblin' Down; Edwin Starr (and Bruce Springsteen's cover)- War.
Second, apocalyptic references: REM- It's The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine); Zager and Evans- In The Year 2525; Nena- 99 Balloons; Barry McGwire- Eve Of Destruction; Everclear- Santa Monica (Watch the World Die); Skeeter Davis- The End Of The World.
Third, anything to do with fire: Blue Oyster Cult-Burning For You; Boston- Smokin'; Jerry Lee Lewis- Great Balls Of Fire; John Mellancamp- Paper In Fire; James Taylor- Fire And Rain; Trammps- Disco Inferno; Talking Heads-Burning Down The House.
Fourth, anything to do with death: J Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers- Last Kiss; Queen- Another One Bites The Dust and Killer Queen; Paper Lace- The Night Chicago Died; Don McLean- American Pie; Wings- Live And Let Die; Billy Joel- Only The Good Die Young; Bobby Darin- Mack The Knife; Bob Dylan (or Guns and Roses) - Knocking On Heaven's Door; Beatles - A Day In The Life; Alice In Chains- Rooster; Blood Sweat and Tears- And When I Die; Norman Greenbaum- Spirit In The Sky; John Lennon- Imagine.
Fifth, anything to do with airplanes: Beatles- Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds; Phil Collins- In The Air Tonight; CCR- Travellin' Band; Neil Diamond- America; Elton John- Bennie And The Jets, Daniel, and Rocket Man;Steve Miller- Jet Airliner; John Parr- Man In Motion; Peter Paul And Mary- Leaving On A Jet Plane; Red Hot Chili Peppers- Aeroplane.
Sixth, missing persons: Three Degrees- When Will I See You Again; Zombies- She's Not There; Lynyrd Skynyrd- Tuesday's Gone; Los Bravos- Black Is Black; Chi-Lites- Have You Seen Her.
Seventh, anything to do with New York City: Ad Libs- Boy From NYC; the Drifters- On Broadway; Martha and the Vandellas- Dancing In The Street; Frank Sinatra- New York, New York.
Eighth-Any title that could possibly be misconstrued: U2-Sunday Bloody Sunday; Van Halen- Jump (but not the Pointer Sisters?) ; Steam- Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye; Pretenders- My City Was Gone; Brooklyn Bridge- Worst That Could Happen; Carole King- I Feel The Earth Move; Dio- Holy Diver; the Clash- Rock the Casbah; Petula Clark- A Sign Of The Times; Black Sabbath- War Pigs; Pat Benatar- Love Is A Battlefield and Hit Me With Your Best Shot; Fontella Bass -Rescue Me; Bangles- Walk Like An Egyptian; Animals- We've Got To Get Out Of This Place; DC5- Bits And Pieces(someone had a sick sense of humor on this one); Surfaris- Wipeout.
Ninth, demonic mentions- AC/DC - Hell's Bells and Highway To Hell; Elvis, Devil In Disguise; Mitch Ryder and the Detroit Wheels- Devil With The Blue Dress On; Santana- Evil Ways.
And finally, ones I just have to scratch my head over ( as if that isn't the whole list): Cat Stevens- Morning Has Broken and Peace Train; Simon And Garfunkel- Bridge Over Troubled Water; Rolling Stones- Ruby Tuesday; Youngbloods- Get Together; Red Hot Chili Peppers- Under The Bridge; Peter Paul And Mary- Blowing In The Wind; Peter and Gordon- A World Without Love; Ricky Nelson- Travellin' Man; Led Zeppelin- Stairway To Heaven; Kansas -Dust In The Wind; Hollies - He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother; Shelley Fabres- Johnny Angel; Jackson Browne-Doctor My Eyes; Beatles- Obla-Di-Obla -Da and Ticket To Ride; and the topper of all- both Satchmo's and Sam Cooke's versions of What A Wonderful World.
(Note: consider the entirety of cats 9 and 10 highlighted.)
Shaking your head yet? Fine. Time to get on with the countdown.
Two songs come into the top ten, two fall out. Dropping are Rhiannon, from 9 to 11, and Fooled Around And Fell In Love, from 8 to 13.
Entering the top ten at 10, up one, are the Stones from the #1 album with Fool To Cry. Up 4 to #9 are the captain and the ever-lovely Tennille with Shop Around. Sara Smile moves two to #8 for Hall And Oates. Henry Gross slips two to 7 with Shannon. Holding at #6 are Pratt and McLain with Happy days. Dorothy Moore rises a pair to 5 with Misty Blue. John Sebastian, leader of the TV theme invasion, slips to #4 with former top dog Welcome Back. Silver Convention edges up a notch to #3 with Get Up And Boogie. At #2, up one for Diana Ross and Love Hangover. And hanging on to the top spot for a second week-
...Wings and Silly Love Songs!!
Okay, that's another week in the can, folks. Until next time, beware airplanes, fires, and signs of the times, okay?
Thursday, June 2, 2011
"We'll save you, Superman!"
Today at work I was reminded of one of the funniest episodes of my youth, and thought it might make a good story for TAW. It involved me as a freshman at Heritage High School and the things I did to survive.
Hah! Made that sound suitably grim, eh? Truth is, I've shared some of my social backwardsness in the past here, so suffice it to say high school was not exactly my element as a freshman. But I had learned long before that the best way to keep people from laughing at the things I was self-conscious about was to get them to laugh at anything else. I used to be like an underground railroad waystation for passing jokes, and quickly used that to my advantage. I got a rep amongst the seniors of the class for being a primo joke teller, and it wasn't long before I was asked on a pretty regular basis if I had some new one-liner.
Another, less fortunate, detail of my freshman persona was born in second grade. In a manner I couldn't tell you then or now how, I fell off the monkey bars at 2 pm recess one day. No real damage (and a pretty cool way to get out of the end of the school day, BTW), but one of the seniors my freshman year was a fourth-grader at St. Louis Besancon when I took my spill. Now I was well known to be a part-time "super-hero" back then, and the fourth-grader-cum-senior retold the tale so that I was "attempting to fly" when I crashed. Thus to some seniors I was "Underdog", and to others "Superman".
So, back to the main story: One day I came to school with one of the best jokes I ever heard. I would trade twenty of the half-witted jokes I do remember to recall how that one went; of course, I have forgotten it. I only remember that it took a supreme act of self-will not to break up in the telling. During lunch, I had just come into the main hallway (where most everyone came after eating) and one of the seniors asked if I had a joke- and I answered, yes, and a good one. Suddenly, one of them ushered me to a centrally located seat whilst another proclaimed, "Hey, everybody!! Superman's got a joke."
I have to admit to a bit of nervousness as the entire area filled up with what had to be close to half of the school. Normally, this was my element, but this was a BIIIG crowd. So I began to tell the joke- I think I got halfway through the first sentence. Then , the principal showed up.
Ivan Mulligan, since deceased, was a great principal and one of the truly class acts I have ever met. Remind me to tell you the fishing story someday. He sees the crowd, enters the circle, and finds a punky freshman surrounded by seniors, and decides I am outnumbered. Before any of us knew what he was about, he took me by one arm and whisked me into the nearby office. "What's going on?" He demanded. I was just explaining the situation when a group of the seniors, recovered from the initial shock, burst into the office shouting, "Don't worry, Superman, we'll save you!" I'm sure you can imagine that my next move was to put my head into my hands and wonder how even a good joke was going to top this debacle. Finally getting the explanation over with, Mr. Mulligan released me to the seniors- and then tagged along, sitting to my right as I told the legendary joke.
God, how I wish I could tell you the tale right now. What I do remember is that when the punchline came, the entire building (at least the inhabited part thereof) exploded with laughter like I'd never heard. All except Mr. Mulligan. And that was an act of will power. With a stern look that fooled exactly nobody, he shook his head, got up, and walked away without a word. And if that didn't make the joke even funnier, it sure made the memory sweeter.
Hah! Made that sound suitably grim, eh? Truth is, I've shared some of my social backwardsness in the past here, so suffice it to say high school was not exactly my element as a freshman. But I had learned long before that the best way to keep people from laughing at the things I was self-conscious about was to get them to laugh at anything else. I used to be like an underground railroad waystation for passing jokes, and quickly used that to my advantage. I got a rep amongst the seniors of the class for being a primo joke teller, and it wasn't long before I was asked on a pretty regular basis if I had some new one-liner.
Another, less fortunate, detail of my freshman persona was born in second grade. In a manner I couldn't tell you then or now how, I fell off the monkey bars at 2 pm recess one day. No real damage (and a pretty cool way to get out of the end of the school day, BTW), but one of the seniors my freshman year was a fourth-grader at St. Louis Besancon when I took my spill. Now I was well known to be a part-time "super-hero" back then, and the fourth-grader-cum-senior retold the tale so that I was "attempting to fly" when I crashed. Thus to some seniors I was "Underdog", and to others "Superman".
So, back to the main story: One day I came to school with one of the best jokes I ever heard. I would trade twenty of the half-witted jokes I do remember to recall how that one went; of course, I have forgotten it. I only remember that it took a supreme act of self-will not to break up in the telling. During lunch, I had just come into the main hallway (where most everyone came after eating) and one of the seniors asked if I had a joke- and I answered, yes, and a good one. Suddenly, one of them ushered me to a centrally located seat whilst another proclaimed, "Hey, everybody!! Superman's got a joke."
I have to admit to a bit of nervousness as the entire area filled up with what had to be close to half of the school. Normally, this was my element, but this was a BIIIG crowd. So I began to tell the joke- I think I got halfway through the first sentence. Then , the principal showed up.
God, how I wish I could tell you the tale right now. What I do remember is that when the punchline came, the entire building (at least the inhabited part thereof) exploded with laughter like I'd never heard. All except Mr. Mulligan. And that was an act of will power. With a stern look that fooled exactly nobody, he shook his head, got up, and walked away without a word. And if that didn't make the joke even funnier, it sure made the memory sweeter.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
What a difference a year makes
Here is an exerpt from my post of exactly one year and two days ago:
You cannot keep working people 70 hours and tell them they are getting farther and farther behind indefinitely. Eventually you have to either realize that you are in over your head and no amount of worker effort will change that, or you press on and destroy your work force. I warned our production manager this day was coming. But corporate attitude seems to be that we can all reach a bit deeper, find that elusive 30% more efficiency we must be hiding so we can work all this overtime.
The truth is, you have a plant on the edge of the breaking strain. They couldn't even give us an enjoyable holiday: make us work 6 hours today with the veiled threat of "we should have worked you Monday."
And one year later? I think we've had one Friday "nooner" for OT all year; I saw at Meijer over the weekend patio cushions (our product at my company, for you newbies) 50% off already; My son, who works at the Ft.Wayne plant (again for you newbies, Ft. Wayne does retail, me and Laurie are in Kendallville doing the dot com end), says that Home Depot just cancelled the rest of their orders for the season, leaving them with $160,000+ in finished goods alone in the warehouse; and he tells us that he's heard that KMart is selling cushions at 25% off already.
A lot has gone into this: a very late arriving spring; our biggest market, in the south, being rocked with disaster after disaster (no sense in having a patio cushion if your patio is either under the neighbor's house or downstream somewhere); an economy that has shed itself of its Obama-fueled illusions of good health; and, IMHO, last year everybody and their brother bought cushions last year and just don't need new ones this year. We are down, I heard, 33% from last year- ironic when you figure that we were thinking that business might more than double this season.
The game ain't over yet for us- it is only June, and in dot-com land that means we still got a decent four months of potential. Retail is all but done, though, and we took a bath there, it seems.
I've heard them threaten 14 hours in the past, so let me publicly state this- I will NOT leave this house at 5 am and get home at 9:30 pm, period. When they ask that, they will find themselves facing a much bigger problem. As we look foreward to another Friday off, I say again- What a difference a year makes.
You cannot keep working people 70 hours and tell them they are getting farther and farther behind indefinitely. Eventually you have to either realize that you are in over your head and no amount of worker effort will change that, or you press on and destroy your work force. I warned our production manager this day was coming. But corporate attitude seems to be that we can all reach a bit deeper, find that elusive 30% more efficiency we must be hiding so we can work all this overtime.
The truth is, you have a plant on the edge of the breaking strain. They couldn't even give us an enjoyable holiday: make us work 6 hours today with the veiled threat of "we should have worked you Monday."
And one year later? I think we've had one Friday "nooner" for OT all year; I saw at Meijer over the weekend patio cushions (our product at my company, for you newbies) 50% off already; My son, who works at the Ft.Wayne plant (again for you newbies, Ft. Wayne does retail, me and Laurie are in Kendallville doing the dot com end), says that Home Depot just cancelled the rest of their orders for the season, leaving them with $160,000+ in finished goods alone in the warehouse; and he tells us that he's heard that KMart is selling cushions at 25% off already.
A lot has gone into this: a very late arriving spring; our biggest market, in the south, being rocked with disaster after disaster (no sense in having a patio cushion if your patio is either under the neighbor's house or downstream somewhere); an economy that has shed itself of its Obama-fueled illusions of good health; and, IMHO, last year everybody and their brother bought cushions last year and just don't need new ones this year. We are down, I heard, 33% from last year- ironic when you figure that we were thinking that business might more than double this season.
The game ain't over yet for us- it is only June, and in dot-com land that means we still got a decent four months of potential. Retail is all but done, though, and we took a bath there, it seems.
I've heard them threaten 14 hours in the past, so let me publicly state this- I will NOT leave this house at 5 am and get home at 9:30 pm, period. When they ask that, they will find themselves facing a much bigger problem. As we look foreward to another Friday off, I say again- What a difference a year makes.
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