Down and out in Scrappyville

Our story seems to have begun two days ago.  As per usual when I get home (and if you recall the lead-in from the latest MWN, you know that day was machine breakdown-a-rama), Scrappy wanted to go for a walk.  But I noted he had a limp- not unusual for him.  He sleeps on my bed which is two-and-a-half feet up- which he jumps without any help (won't take it).  He pulls against his leash with the leg he's limping on; and of course, he's getting old.  So it wasn't a surprise that he might be gimpy this day.  So I decided to just go to the bark park.  Here, he met up with a pair of younger dogs that were run run run.  He wore himself out trying to keep up with the, er, young pups, but showed no real ill effects that night.  The next morning (yesterday), though, he came in from his morning bathroom trip acting strange.  Wouldn't go upstairs, wouldn't jump up on the couch or chair, and when he tried to sit, he was visibly uncomfortable, bending over when he tried.  He wouldn't lay, just kept wandering around, whining.

Now Bobby G, and probably a few of you others, know the story of our last dog, Fred.  The last day of his life scarred me in ways I cannot heal from.  When I went to go to work, he followed me to the door- which he never does- looking at me as if to say, "Help, Daddy."  I had thought he was bound up.  I told Laurie to try giving him some olive oil, and take him for a walk, which would help- but of course, this was the day it just HAD to rain ALL day.

So in this frame of mind I went to work- and with the cutter down (a long stupid other story), I was sewing on the box stitcher- a slow, boring process, perfect for sitting and worrying.  At 10, Laurie called and said he was very sore around his butt, and she was pretty upset- compounded by the fact that she had called the work # first and left a message, which my boss in the midst of every machine in the plant falling apart, forgot about.  I told her to call the vet.  She called back with a appointment time, and I lit out of work like, as my dad used to say, "a bat out of Zulu."

Yes, that's a real place.

The vet looked him over and found nothing in his stomach, colon, or any of the places I was worried about.  She had been told about the day at the hump'n'dump and theorized he overdid it.  He must have muscle pain, as there seemed to be nothing structurally wrong.  She prescribed him anti-inflammatory pills the size of VWs and asked us to call the next day.

That day is today, and Scrappy started it out about 80%.  He had gone from needing an ice cream bar to get him to go upstairs the first afternoon to refusing help and getting up on the bed himself that night to up and down with only mild hesitation this morning.  He's pretty much back to normal tonight, but doggies are masters at hiding pain until it's too late.  So we're watching him closely, but it is nice to have the old Scrappy back.

Now, if we could just convince him he's not a young pup anymore...

TimeMachine week 92

Our mixed bag of what happened on our target date this week, November 1, 1971, leads off with a piece of... er, literature... released today that was more famous for what it represented than anything within its pages.  The Anarchist's Cookbook, a compilation on things such as making bombs and attacking telecommunication systems, was a one-finger salute to the establishment by William Powell, who has since become an Anglican Christian and disavowed the tome.  In fact, he tried to get it taken out of print for years, but the publisher refused.  In 1991 that publisher was bought out, and of the several thousand books the new publisher acquired in the deal, Cookbook was the ONLY one they dropped.

Also, the Eisenhower Dollar was first released to the public.  Never saw one?  Not surprising; it had nearly a 100% "extinction rate" (meaning it was sold first to collectors and they never spent it again).

And finally, this is the cover date for one of the great books in comics history:

Avengers (first series) #93, part of the game-changing Kree-Skrull War storyline, illustrated by the great Neal Adams, written by Roy Thomas, and the origin point of dozens of later storylines.  The Kree-Skrull storyline stretched from #89-97, and was so popular that back in the day, my mom was able to get ONLY the first episode.  I paid $20 about 15 years ago for my copy.  On today's comics price guide, a near mint copy will run you $340 or more.


Welcome to Time Machine, where we deal with super hits rather than superheroes.  This week, the 7th class of the Martin Hall Of Fame; not one, but two songs that clear at least 19 spots to hit the top ten; the penultimate (AKA second-to-last) episode of stars of the 50 states; the great cover battle; and just for fun, the Fantastic Four!  Up, up, and away!!!!!

Frankly, Sue, I fail to see the need for our presence in a MUSIC blog...

We start out with number ones across the land- at least where Mamy Blue hasn't taken over!  In the Netherlands, the Scots band Middle Of The Road (who brought us the original of Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep earlier this year) hits the top with their song Soley Soley. If nothing else can be said for the band (the song is really pretty good), the lead singer, Sally Carr, is worth a nod in the next TM Beauty Contest:

 The only other change internationally was the Great White North exchanging one Osmond for a bunch, as Yo-Yo took over the top spot.  Around the US of A, it stacks up like this.  Both Detroit stations place Have You Seen Her at the top;  Pittsburgh, LA, both Minneapolis stations, and one Chicago station has Gypsies Tramps and Thieves at #1, while WLS stubbornly holds out for Yo-Yo.  Peace Train is now on top of the AC charts; Six degrees accomplice from last week Denise LaSalle's Trapped By A Thing Called Love is at the R&B #1; and Lynne Anderson's How Do I Unlove You holds onto the Country title.

Which, then, brings us to the hot 100 debuts for this week.  And what a lot- out of 20 new tunes, I'll feature 8 of them- Dennis Coffey and the Detroit Guitar Band come in at #91 with Scorpio; The Stylistcs' classic You Are Everything is in at #90; Diana Ross' UK #1 I'm Still Waiting comes in here at #87; The Who also debut with a classic- Behind Blue Eyes at #82; Sly and the Family Stone- who will be having a few mentions today- come in at #81 with Family Affair; David Cassidy's solo cover of the Association's hit Cherish comes in at #74; and Michael Jackson comes in with a solo hit at #59, Got To Be There.

That brings us to our birthday song feature.  Turning thirty this week, Hall and Oates' Say It Isn't So, Elton John's I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues, and... uhhh.... Madonna's first top 40 single, Holiday.  If only we knew then...

Turning 35, we have Two of the songs I absolutely HATED the most back then.  One was Neil Diamond and Barbra Streisand's You Don't Bring Me Flowers; the other, Chic's Le Freak.  This was soon after our local station started airing Casey Kasem's American Top 40.  It had debuted on the BB chart at #37, and I couldn't stand it instantly.  It wasn't (yet) airing here, and when the next countdown had got in the 20's without it, I thought, "Good, it died a quick death and went away."  But I hadn't done my math right, and I was totally surprised when Casey played it at #6!!!  I don't dislike it near as much now- something I really can't say for Neil and Babs.  Also turning 35, The Cars' My Best Friend's Girl and Bob Seger and the band's We've Got Tonite (which I liked until Kenny Rogers and Sheena Easton butchered it for me).

One song turns 40- Jim Stafford's tender love song Spiders And Snakes.  Turning 45 we have Glen Campbell's Wichita Lineman, the recently featured Jose Feliciano's Star Spangled Banner, Stevie Wonder's For Once In My Life, and Judy Collins' Both Sides Now.  Finally, hitting the big 5-0 we have the Beach Boys' Be True To Your School and the Singing Nun's Dominique.  Blow Out The Candles...


Before we get to the really good stuff, let's refer to the map...

We are almost done with the highest charting acts of the 50 states, and this week we had to do some real stretches...

South Dakota- the best I could do here (no offense) is Shawn Colvin, who sang background on Suzanne Vega's 1987 hit Luka, and charted her own hit in 1997, Sunny Come Home.

Tennessee- Aretha Franklin, who'll also have a big part in something around the corner, with 72 hot 100s and 18 top tens.

Texas- the aforementioned Kenny Rogers, who in solos and duets charted 29 hot 100s and 8 top tens.

Utah- Cahmann, you know this.  Donny Osmond, solo and with Marie, had 24 hot 100s and 8 top tens.

Vermont- again, we make a colossal stretch of the rules and point out that Rudy Vallee is Vermont-born.



That brings us to the 45 at 45- the #45 song 45 years ago.  This week it belongs to a Detroit outfit called the Fantastic Four with their song I Love You Madly.  This band had been on local label Ric-Tic before Motown bought them out, and outsold even Edwin Starr there, charting an R&B #6 with The Whole World's A Stage.  This tune was their only chart hit for Motown, though they stayed together until they lost two founding members- "Sweet James" Epps and Cleveland Home- in 2000.  One of the remaining brothers was still trying to reforge a new FF as late as 2010.

Okay, I'm Reed, you're Sue... no, you can be Johnny... You're just a thing, man!

Big mover time!  Going up- Have You Seen Her by the Chi-Lites shoots up 46 spots to #41; going down, Bill Withers drops 29 to #42 with Ain't No Sunshine.



One of the songs that gets into this week's top 40 is the Isley Brothers' cover of War's Spill The Wine.  Which got me thinking- I see an awful lot of covers done by two R&B acts in particular- the Isleys and Aretha Franklin.  So I got looking into it.  The Isleys picked an eclectic mix of songs to cover, including:

Love The One You're With (original hit 14 on BB, their cover 18)
Spill The Wine (which missed the BB top 40 at 49, while the original hit #3)
Lay Lady Lay (Yeah, that one surprised me, too; I also learned that Dylan wanted to give it to the Everlys, but Phil thought he sang "lay across my big bad breasts" or something like that, and turned him down- he never knew the right words until Dylan's single started playing.  He hit #7; the Isleys hit 71.)
It's Too Late (original #1, theirs 39 R&B)
Summer Breeze (original #6, theirs 60).

Aretha had a much larger assortment of covers, along with original singles that songwriters would record later like You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woman.  She also had a string of hits that had charting b-side covers.  Here are a few of her a-side covers:

(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction (original #1, hers didn't chart in the US)
I Say A Little Prayer (original 4, hers 10)
The Weight (original a classic despite only charting at #63; hers 19)
Eleanor Rigby (original 11, hers 17)
Bridge Over Troubled Water (original #1, hers 6)
Ain't Nothing Like The Real Thing (original #8, hers 47)
What A Fool Believes (original #1, hers 17 R&B)
Jumpin' Jack Flash (original #3, hers 21)
Everyday People (original #1, hers 13 R&B).

So Aretha did a little better against the originals than the Isleys did, but not near as well as the queen of covers, Linda Ronstadt:

When Will I Be Loved (original 8, hers 2)
Heat Wave (Hers 5, original 4)
Tracks Of My Tears ( one of Aretha's b-side covers; Aretha charted at 71, the original at 16, Linda at 25)
That'll Be The Day (original 1, hers 11)
Blue Bayou (original 29, hers 3)
Back In The USA (both peaked at 16)
Ooh Baby Baby (original 16, hers 7)
Hurts So Bad (hers 8, original 10)
I Knew You When (Original 14, hers 37).

And that's how you cover a song!

Speaking of the top 40 (which I did at the beginning of that bunny trail), let's look at our 5 debuts this week.  Up 10 spots to land at 40 is Bobby Sherman with Jennifer.  That Isleys cover of Spill The Wine moves up a pair to #39.  Coven hits with One Tin Soldier, up 11 to #36.  Up 11 spots to 34, a DJ by the name of Freddie North with his only top 40 hit, She's All I Got.  And finally, storming up from 52 to 30, Bread with Baby I'm-A Want You.


And Nowwwwww the 7th class of the Martin Hall Of Fame!  For those who aren't in the know ( and have been inexplicably unable to scroll up and click on the MHOF page), the MHOF has acts arranged by these titles:  Top names, top men, top women, not so rock'n'roll, personal favorites, and golden oldies.  This class of the MHOF features:

Top Names

With 10 top 40s and 3 #1s, Sly and the Family Stone!
With 7 top forties, 2 #1s, and a lasting influence... The Byrds!
With 21 top 40s and 3 top dogs... Three Dog Night!

Heh heh... 3 "top dogs" for three DOG night... it was a joke, right?

Top Men

With 6 top forties and a LOT of writing and production credits... Todd Rundgren!
With 9 top forties, a man I couldn't believe I hadn't put in yet... Tom Jones!

Top Women

With 21 top 40s and 4 #1s... Cher!

Not so R'N'R

With 33 top 40s and 3 #1s... Paul Anka!

Personal

With 5 top 40 hits... Pablo Cruise!
With 6 top 40s and a top dog... Bill Withers!

Golden Oldies

With 12 top 40s and a classic #1.... Gary Lewis and the Playboys!
And, with 5 top 40s... The Orlons!

And there you have the 7th semi-annual class of the MHOF!  Congratulations to one and all!

__________________________________

Three songs jump in- two of them REALLY jump in- so three fall out.  The droppers:  Thin Line Between Love And Hate (10 to 11), Sweet City Woman (7 to 22), and If You Really Love Me (9 to 27).

Lee Michaels takes a 6-spot drop, and that hurts.  Do You Know What I Mean?

Cat Stevens claws his way into the top ten, with an unspectacular (this week) 6-notch jump to #9 with Peace Train.

From 29 to # 8, John Lennon with The Internationale  Imagine.

Al Green is not only Tired Of Being Alone, he's tired of going up.  He slips from 6 to 7.

The Free Movement freely moves from 8 to 6 with I Found Someone Of My Own.

From 24 to #5, Isaac Hayes with Theme From Shaft.  I always kinda liked Bart Simpson doing it at karaoke.

Yer damn right...

The Carpenters slip from 3 to 4 with Superstar.

The Osmonds lose their runner-up slot, sliding to 3 with Yo-Yo.

The three week reign of Rod Stewart and Maggie May is over, it slips to #2.

And that means, Minneapolis, LA, Pittsburgh, and Chicago told you so! the new #1...

...Cher, with Gypsies Tramps And Thieves!



Next week, more Reed Richards (not really), more Sally Carr (you never know), and more fun (guaranteed)!

Martin World News

Hey!  I haven't done a Martin World News in like forever (okay, three weeks on the head), and I thought it might be more entertaining than a day where two guys trying to fix my cutter killed it, so I went to sew on the box stitcher which was shredding thread on the average of every three or four attempts, and when I went to the maintenance guy to fix it, he was trying to figure out why the brand new laser light he just installed on a snap machine wouldn't light up.  Well, better than living it, anyway.

ITEM:  Today is our day for news from Norway.  First up, a moose hunter took careful (allegedly) aim at 1,000 pounds of good eatin', fired, and... hit a 70-year-old man sitting on the toilet in his vacation home, conveniently located somewhere behind the moose.  The man was not badly hurt (though probably was glad he was sitting down for this one), and the moose escaped unharmed.  Oddly enough, the story from sky.com - which is a bit deficient in details such as how far away the home was, DID manage to mention the victim's wife "doesn't hold a grudge".  Hmmm...

ITEM:  Norway, round two, where deep in a mountain valley lies the town of Rjuken.  So deep, in fact, that most of the six month long winter the mountains block out the sun.  So, the town decided to do something about it.

They set three 183 sq. ft. mirrors up on one of the mountains to reflect sunlight into the valley.  The town rejoiced- except, perhaps, for the man who was making a living cable-carring people up the mountain the last few years to get a winter's look at the sun.

Now I had thought it would be amusing if they were so far north that once they got the mirrors up, they learned that the sun doesn't even rise in the winter!  No such luck, though; the town is in southern Norway and the worst they get is just under a six-hour day.

ITEM:  You would think some people would consider it imperative to get along with their hairdresser, am I right?

TV chef Guy Fieri is one of them, IMHO, but today a video surfaced of he and his dresser- both allegedly drunk- having an altercation on a highway in which Fieri kicked him out of his stopped SUV.  Having seen the video, let me give you the highlights:  You barely see Guy, and the dresser throws wussy punches at him and cries, "You're a (part of the male body whose full name is Richard)" over and over.  With the cold light of sobriety, though they made up.  Which is good, or else America's favorite chef might end up looking like this:

Oh, wait.  That ship HAS sailed...

ITEM:  And now a Russia double-header.  First, the city of Omsk steps into the PC debate over Halloween:

Dressing your child up as a witch or pirate costume and sending them off to a school Halloween party may seem innocuous, but it could actually have "destructive consequences," according to education department officials in the Omsk region.
A letter to the directors of education institutions and municipal departments advised them against celebrating Halloween in the region's schools this year so as not to encourage "extremist attitudes" among Omsk's youth, Interfax reported Wednesday.

Halloween's latent extremist influence has been demonstrated by studies at the Russian Academy of Education's institute of pedagogical innovations as well as the institute for family and upbringing, the department said in a statement.
These studies showed that Halloween's "mystical content, explicit promotion of the cult of death, its personification, can have destructive consequences for the psychic, spiritual and moral well-being of students," the statement said.

I'm sorry, but thinking like that is why your hockey team is 5-13-5 and looking for it's third coach of the year.

ITEM:  Our second story involves the efforts of Moscow to alleviate the traffic jams that clog the city every day.  The bright idea?  Make 'em pay to park!  And not just parking meters, but you can get an app and pay by phone... unfortunately, some are finding that the connection fails and get hauled off anyway.  The deputy mayor of the city claims that traffic in midtown was cut by 25%- though some trackers claim that's just a tad (read completely) exaggerated.  I know, you're thinking, that must be some darn expensive parking fees to cut traffic 25% in six months, cut three hours off the average parking time, and speed up traffic by about 6 kph!  It works out to be- are you sitting down?

Around $1.53 an hour.  Not terribly bad by our standards, but when you figure the average Russian grosses about $5.30 an hour, it MIGHT be a bit stiff...

ITEM: In China, meanwhile, officials are encouraging major websites to be purveyors of positive energy.

Minister of the State Internet Information Office Lu Wei said in an online media forum that mainstream news portals and big commercial websites should play an exemplary role in strengthening management, developing healthy trends, pooling positive energy and contributing to the Chinese dream.

And what exactly is the Chinese Dream?

The official proposed using the Internet to "hear the will of the people, promote advanced socialist culture, and carry forward the virtue of integrity".

Hmm.  I thought maybe Jandi Lin was the Chinese Dream.

As an important bridge linking the Communist Party of China and the government to the people, the Internet should tell stories of common people pursuing their dreams, said the official.
I notice it was "pursuing" and not "achieving".


I would mention this sounds like someone we all know, but we don't dig into the Hard stuff here at MWN!

ITEM:  How about a cute one for a change?  No, no more giant rubber duckies (this time).  Pope Francis was giving a speech (or is that a sermon?) the other day when a little boy ran onto the stage and gave him a hug.

So the Pope patted him on the head, gave him a blessing, sat him in his own chair, and went on with his talk.  How cool is that?

ITEM:  Finally today, Dell has to deal with some pissed off- or maybe on- customers.  They purchased the new Latitude 6430u Ultrabook, at prices around $2,600- only to find the ebook smelled like cat urine- in some cases making the customer physically sick.  It did even worse to one customer:

But it was apparently too late for one unsatisfied buyer, askanyon else, who posted on October 29, that the cat had paid the ultimate price and he had only just noticed this thread.
"I want you to know that I killed our 1 year old cat, thinking it was p***ing on my computer each night and now come across THIS forum telling me otherwise. Not only do I want a new computer, I want a new cat, vet fees, letter of apology and payment for my divorce lawyer, since my wife has left me after finding this out" he wrote.

Boy, I remember that it used to be if you had a computer problem, blame the mouse.  Now, it's blame the cat.

"What?  Surely you don't think I had anything to do with this?"

"I Don't Know", starring Barrack Obama

 

(Imagine this to a soft piano tune, like something FDR  Fred Astaire would soft-shoe to...)

 

 

I don't know why Merkel's pissed off

prob'ly someone on her party line just clicked off

I'm just that guy who wants to spread world peace

Not like Bill Clinton

("Say, how old is your niece?")

It's a troubling question,

So I'll have to say, "I don't know"

(He didn't know, he didn't know, he didn't know...)

 

Fast and Furious, did Holder mess that up? Er,

I mean, that's something else I never heard of

I been busy up on Capitol Hill

Makin' sure Harry don't have debate on that bill

It's a troubling question,

So I'll have to say, "I don't know"

(He didn't know, he didn't know, he didn't know...)

 

 

I didn't know, about no Ben Ghazi

An Ambassador?, Hmm, you really got me

Selling guns to al-Qaeda?  Well, I'll be hung,

I guess Hillary was in the girls room tryin' to look young

It's a troubling question,

So I'll have to say, "I don't know"

(He didn't know, he didn't know, he didn't know...)

 

Trouble gettin' your health insurance?

(Michelle, it's gettin' hot in here-  turn down the furnace)

I shoulda asked Al Gore, he made the internet, I hear-a

But he's busy counting all his money from al-Jazeera

It's a troubling question,

So I'll have to say, "I don't know"

(He didn't know, he didn't know, he didn't know...)

 

 

(Instrumental interlude, as our hero dances around the facts wearing his Nobel medal and his dunce cap)

 

 

This ol' White House is gettin' kinda natty

Guess I'll shuffle off to good ol' Cincinnati

The IRS there got in some trouble, I saw

I heard about it on Rush Limbaugh

It's a troubling question,

So I'll have to say, "I don't know"

(He didn't know, he didn't know, he didn't know...)

 

 



Sunday Message: Success in Life

Ah you're breathing faster
Silence the only sound
There's no need to be nice on the way up
Cos you're not coming down

 

Genesis, Paperlate

 

 

 

Lately I have heard on secular radio a commercial that goes something like:

 

 

"What if there was a way to be prosperous that the banks didn't want you to know... a code in the pages of the Bible?.... Now, Dr. so-and-so, former pastor, will show you this Biblical code..."

 

 

So, is there a Biblical code for success in this life?  You bet there is!  I found it last night when I was reading, and it's based on three very simple principles.

 

#1- Don't Deny...

 

 

We are taught from an early age, there's a right and a wrong way to do things.  But that is way too limiting if you want to get ahead on this earth.  You have a fantastic array of talents and opportunities at your fingertips, and to get ahead, you should use them to the fullest.  Why say no just because, "It wouldn't be right"?  What is it you want?  The next promotion?  Find out who's in line for it and undercut them.  What needs to be done?  Do it no matter what it takes, or better yet, let someone else do it and take the credit!  If you have to bend the rules just a little bit, there's no harm- remember, the next guy is doing it to you.  "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you", the so-called Golden Rule, is not in the Bible... but go get the thing you want, no matter what, is!

 

 

#2- ...Glorify!

 

 

 

Being that nice, humble fellow that everyone likes is nice... if you want to be unnoticed at promotion time.  They call it a promotion because you need to promote yourself!  Substance doesn't matter near as much as style.  Go to any high powered office and tell me what you see.  Is it the dirty fingernailed, hard working blue-collar guy, the frumpy mom working two jobs to make ends meet?  No!  It's the Men's Warehouse clothes horse, the woman off the cover of Esquire with her high heels and plunging neckline.  Anyone can go in a factory and do manual labor.  But it's the one who looks good doing the job that produces nothing a person can take home and actually use that makes all the dough.  Don't believe it?  Who makes the most money?  Men who play games for a living, and the better at self promotion, the fatter the contract;  the men who buy and sell companies for a living, never actually making anything, but selling the value of those who do;  and Oprah Winfrey, and others like her whose only real contribution to society is being famous.  Face it, being hard working, normal, ugly- that blows.  You need to blow your OWN horn.

 

 

#3- Kiss the bosses' butt.

 

 

No matter how high you get, there's always someone higher.  And it's that person who can get you the power you crave.  But they AREN'T going to be impressed with what you have, because they have more.  They AREN'T going to be impressed with how you look, because they look better.  No, the only way to get to them is to TELL them they have more, that they look better, and how impressed you are that they do and how much you want to be like them.  Oh, and one more thing- you have to convince them that THEIR goals, THEIR needs, are more important to you than yours are!  Can you do that, Bunkie?  Well, if you mastered the other two, it should be no problem.

 

 

 

There you have it- the Biblical code for success on this world.  Is it really Biblical?  You bet it is!  Is it from God?

 

 

Well.... there's where the problem comes in.  It IS in the Bible, but it isn't God who says it.  Here, let me show you...

 

 

 Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. ² And when He had fasted forty days and forty nights, afterward He was hungry. ³ Now when the tempter came to Him, he said, “If You are the Son of God, command that these stones become bread.”

⁴ But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.’”^[a]
5 Then the devil took Him up into the holy city, set Him on the pinnacle of the temple, ⁶ and said to Him, “If You are the Son of God, throw Yourself down. For it is written:

‘He shall give His angels charge over you,’

and,

‘In their hands they shall bear you up,
Lest you dash your foot against a stone.’”^[b]

⁷ Jesus said to him, “It is written again, ‘You shall not tempt the Lord your God.’”^[c]

⁸ Again, the devil took Him up on an exceedingly high mountain, and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. ⁹ And he said to Him, “All these things I will give You if You will fall down and worship me.”
¹⁰ Then Jesus said to him, “Away with you,^[d] Satan! For it is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God, and Him only you shall serve.’”^[e]

 

Gotcha, didn't I?  See, Satan's first temptation to Jesus was, "Cheat to get what you want."  It started with Jesus' hunger- a reasonable enough thing.  We all know you're going to eat once you get back to Galilee... and it's within Your power to "make a snack"... and who's gonna know, and what's it gonna hurt?  But Jesus replied that the things of this Earth aren't the important things; what God wants for us is.

You might say, what about Jacob?  Didn't he cheat to get the birthright, and he prospered... and what about David?  He took advantage of his position to gain Bathsheba... and they were the parents of the wisest man who ever lived, and that worked out okay, right?   Yes Jacob cheated... and as a result he was cheated himself, in that what should have been given to him without price cost him 14 years of hard labor.  And the prize, the woman he loved, was made barren and miserable, and in the end died early.  And David?  He got made a fool of by his own Prophet and lost a baby he prayed day and night for.  He had to fight his own children in order to give the kingdom to the child he loved.  Still sound like such a good deal?

Satan's second temptation always confused me, until I thought about all the work it would have saved Jesus.  None of that travelling on foot and by boat, begging for alms, sleeping "with no place to lay His head".  He could have just set up a throne right there at the Temple and people would have come right to Him- even the Pharisees, who couldn't have denied a troop of angels, after all.  But He replied to Satan, "I have a job to do... and I wish to do it right."

You say, what about Solomon?  He had a throne, a glorious throne, a nation working for him, and he wrote three books of the Bible!  Yes, but look at his life.  He received his wealth from God not because God wanted him to be wealthy- but because he was the wisest man in the world, and it takes a lot for a man that rich to realize he's a fool.  Instead of realizing that God gave him the wealth for it to be his burden, he did what any stupid man would have done with it.  And at the end of his life, he saw that the whole thing was an exercise in vanity, and he would have been better off a simple working man, doing what God had allotted him and enjoying the simple fruits of his labor.


Satan's third temptation was the one with the hook.  There was a price to pay for ultimate power, and that price was to recognize Satan as Boss.  Jesus had a simple answer to that- Get ye hence, only God is boss.  I want you to think here about the story of the Prodigal Son.  Now granted, there are those whose lives they have sealed from God (see the Monday Message a while back), and if they follow the "Biblical Code For Worldly Success", they may well find themselves worldly success.  Remember in Luke 12, there was a rich man who had all that success and all that power, without ever a regret.  Unlike him, the Prodigal still had the lessons his father taught him buried inside.  And eventually, when Satan got tired of trying to "bring him to the dark side", he just took it all away, leaving our hero in a pig troth fighting for corn shucks.  It just doesn't work for the Chosen of God.  If you walk that path, eventually, you will end up at the troth, trying to find the words of repentance.

And the other guy, with no regrets, who wholeheartedly followed the Satan plan?  Eventually, he heard:

But God said unto him, ‘Thou fool, this night thy soul shall be required of thee. Then whose shall those things be, which thou hast provided?’


The results of working for the Kingdom of Heaven are implicit in the name.  The results of working for the kingdoms of earth, on the other hand, I hope I've made apparent.



And just when all seems lost...

So yesterday, I kick off the morning tweaking something in my back- just enough to make work miserable.  Then, in the middle of cutting some pieces a sewer messed up, the machine suddenly stopped.

No reason, just stopped. 

So like any good IT guy (Hopefully the guys at A Beer For The Shower won't mind I borrowed that line), I shutdown and re-booted. 

"Warning: Your PC doesn't not have a lock."

WTH?

What followed was an hour of trying to pull various people from a conference call to assess the situation only to figure out, after 5 minutes of actual application to the problem:

"Call the manufacturer."

Who then confirmed the worst: the part of it's brain that connects PC to machine has died.  Thus, I was sent home early and told to stay home today.

Which, if nothing else, was a relief for my back.

Flash to this morning, when shortly after a shopping trip Laurie was in the kitchen putting Mountain Dews in the frig to get cold, began to chuckle.

The missing lens had at last appeared, hiding between her case of MD and the wall.  I haven't the faintest how it got there.  Laurie says she even moved the case and hadn't found it before.  But with the last cans taken out, she picked up the empty and down it fell.

I said, "That means that within ten minutes, Wal-Mart will call and say my new glasses are in."

11:26 AM- couldn't have been two minutes later- my phone rang.

Don't you just love when life is predictable?  So Laurie will pick them up at work tonight and I have the backup pair of glasses I should have gotten in the first place.


Move forward one more time, to this afternoon.  Back still hurts some, and it's cold out there, but  I decide to take Scrappy and Stick to the dog park.  Lesson # 1:  When it's cold enough outside that you can comfortably wear your hoodie around the house all day, it is cold enough to wear a second jacket.  Future reference, doncha know.

 

Scrappy checking the scene.

 

Suddenly, a fine little lady enters.

 

Caught her in a shake.  How does she shake it?

 

 

 

Like that!

 

Just as I mentioned, "Scrappy doesn't know what to do with a dog that just stands there,"  and her dad said, "She usually plays,"  She made her move.

 

And then, they left, and we went home.  The end.



And now with the interesting stuff done, the first thing I did with my eyes returned to status quo ante is to figure up how the Martin favorite hockey team leading scorer list is going.  Here's the top 16, with last time's rank and notes about the newbies.

1. (1 last time) Derek Ryan, Rekord, Austria, 14 goals-14 assists-28 points.

2. (2) John Hughes, Rekord, 8-19-27.

3. (18) Jean-Michel Daoust, Stavenger, Norway, 7-13-20.

4. (9t) Dan Kissel, Stavenger, 6-14-20.

5t. (8) Cory Quirk, SonderjyksE, Denmark, 9-9-18.

5t. (NR) Brent Walton, SonderjyskE.  From Georgetown, Ont., he had a year at Dayton in the ECHL in 2006-7, and spent the last couple of years in the German second league.  9-9-18.

7. (6) Petr Sinagl, Sanok, Poland, 8-10-18.

8. (NR) Kurt Davis, Stavenger.  A Plymouth, MA, native and graduate of Minnesota State, Kurt is in his second season with the Oilers.  6-12-18.

9. (15)  Martin Vozdeky, Sanok, 9-8-17.

10.  (On the team leaders who didn't make the list" List) Jaroslav Markovic, Martin, Slovakia.  A native, his brief experience outside of Slovakia was two seasons at Tri-Cities of the old USHL in 2004-5 and 2005-6.  A Martin vet, he's at 7-10-17.

11. (4) Giullio Scandella, Val Pusteria, Italy, 6-11-17.

12. (11t) Jiri Polansky, Trinec, Czech Rep., 5-12-17.

13. (7) Martin Adamsky, Trinec, 10-6-16.

14. (3) Stefan Meyer, Sheffield, UK, 8-8-16.

15t. (11t) Stefan Frank, SonderjyskE, 7-9-16.

15t. (16t) Dennis McCauley, Val Pusteria, 7-9-16.


And the "We lead our team but didn't make the top 16" list:

Lida, Belarus- Pavel Kutsevich, a 30 year-old vet of 375 games in the Belarussian league, 4-7-11.

JYP Jyvaskyla, Finland- Ossi Louhivaara (also on this list last time), 3-10-13.

Rouen, France- Julien Derossiers, 9-5-14.

Grizzly Adams Wolfsburg, Germany- Mark Dzieduszycki (11t last time), 7-7-14.

Yaroslavl, KHL- Sergei Plotnikov, a veteran of the Amur Khabarovsk team in his second season with the new Loko, 2-8-10.

Farjestad, Sweden- Joakim Hillding, a 3-year vet of the team, 7-5-12.

Geneva Servette, Switzerland- Cody Almond (5th last time), 7-7-14.

Tohoku Free Blades, Asia- Go Tanaka, a vet of this tem and, if you can believe this, the now-folded Seibu Prince Rabbits before this, 7-5-12.

 

 

New York Islanders, NHL- Frans Nielsen, a Dane who is spending his seventh campaign on Long Island after four years in the old Swedish Eliteserien, 5-6-11.

Fort Wayne Komets, ECHL- They've only had the one game, and in it Mickey Lang scored twice.  He is a Reno, NV, native, who led the Quad City Mallards in the CHL in scoring last year. 


In the meantime, I've decided to do goalies as well.  I'll start filtering in their stories as we go on, but here's the first list:

1.  Ruben Smith, Stavenger, 1.22 goals-against average.
2. Curtis Sanford, Lokomotiv, 1.68.
3. Jean-Sebastien Aubin, Val Pusteria, 1.80.
4. Tuomis Tarkki, JYP, 1.97.
5. Sebastian Vogt, GA Wolfsburg, 2.00.
6.Tobias Stephan, Geneva Servette, 2.06.
7.Alfie Michaud, SonderjyskE, 2.26.
8. John Murray, Sanok, 2.43.
9. Fredrik Pettersson Wentzel, Farjestad, 2.46.
10. Fabrice L'Henry, Rouen, 2.53.
11. Martin Surek, Martin, 2.73.
12. John Muse, Komets, 2.77- however, after one game he has been loaned to the Charlotte Checkers, so I don't know who'll be top gun in the K's nets yet.
13. Evgeni Nabakov, NY Islanders, 2.79.
14. Jean-Phillipe Lamoureaux, Rekord, 2.82.
15. Simon Hrubec, Trinec, 2.86.
16. Frank Doyle, Sheffield, 2.88.
17. Michikazu Hatta, Tohoku, 3.39.
18.  Alex Brish, Lida, 3.71.


Okay, I'm done.  You can wake up now.

Time Machine week 91

 You know, these days it's pretty common to be able to look at a certain event or couple of events and say, "That's really where we've gone around the bend.  Especially if you focus on Washington.  But on this day, October 25th, 1971, we have a pair of bookend events which did the same thing back then.  That first event was the UN, led by the communist states therein and their lickspittle African remoras, throwing Taiwan out of the UN (which, as Taiwan pointed out, was against their charter) and shoehorning Red China into their place.  At this point, no matter what you may have thought of  Chiang Kai-Shek, you may have seen the world taking that slow turn into turning fantasy into reality.  But if it wasn't enough for you to admit we were slowly turning from reality to Bizarro World, guess what happened the same day?

That's right.  Walt Disney World in Orlando was dedicated.

I did NOT say, "Chiang Kai-SHREK"!!!

Welcome to another example of that trend, Time Machine for this week!  This episode, we have: 5 states who all have relatively good examples of native stars for a change; A band that was named something naughty without intending to be; a good example of a song that everyone's done; no six degrees, no 45 at 45, and why; and the finish of AUTUMN MADNESS!  So let's gather round and sing- T-I-M... E-M-A... C-H-I-N-E!!!!

So let's open up the floor to #1s around the globe, and deal with Mamy Blue one more time.  If the #1s globally don't seem to get updated much any more, here's why:  the version by Charisma will be #1 in South Africa the next 12 weeks; three more weeks in France for the Pop Tops; seven more weeks in Switzerland; Germany is one week away from starting its 10 weeks at the top.  In Australia, I need to mention a boo-boo I made- ever since this feature started, I have mentioned that the Band Daddy Cool had the song Eagle Rock at #1... but somewhere in all these weeks I wasn't looking carefully enough because it switched to the song Daddy Cool by the group Drummond!  Well, I got clued in last night when I found another source that not only explained that, but said that both were supplanted this week with Olivia Newton-John 's Banks Of The Ohio.  So I looked at the Go-Set chart (the Australian survey I had been using) and it said, yes, Olivia hits number one- but not till their chart of November 13th, by which Dayde's Mamy Blue had risen to #2! ay-yi-yi!  Everyone else holds steady with the song they had at the top last week, but I also have found a source for the New Zealand charts- and there, a local group called  The Rumour is at the top with L'amour Est L'Enfante De La Liberte (Love Is The Child Of Freedom).  The Rumour was led by twin brothers Shade and Gerald Smith.

Around the nation, Shaft remains at the top on WKNR in Detroit, but CLKW turns to The Chi-Lites' Have You Seen Her.  Everyone else is neatly divided;  LA, Pittsburgh, and Chicago's WLS have Yo-Yo at the top, and WCFL and both Minneapolis stations have Gypsies Tramps and Thieves at the top.

Wrapping up this segment, I note that the AC chart is topped by the Fifth Dimension's take on Never My Love, the R&B by the Persuaders' Thin Line Between Love And Hate, and country still by Lynn Anderson's How Can I Unlove You.

Moving on to the hot 100 debuts this weekI have to start by mentioning that Olivia's Banks Of The Ohio debuts here at#94.  Also coming in this week, Stevie Winwood redoes his 1968 hit with the Spencer Davis Group, Gimme Some Lovin', with his new band Traffic, and it hits at 93; The Chi-Lites come in at 87 with Have You Seen Her; Melanie comes in with Brand New Key at 76; and at 68, a song I knew by the Vogues is redone by Tom Jones.  Till hit for the Vogues at #27 in '68, but they were far from the first or the only in doing this tune.  Percy Faith (#63) and Roger Williams (#22) both charted in 1957; Tony Bennett took it to 35 on the UK charts in 1961; The Angels (famous for My Boyfriend's Back) took it to #14 in '61 as well; and Dorothy Squires, most famous for being the wife of Roger Moore from 1953-69, hit #25 on the UK charts in 1970.

Rog and Dot in1959- before she threw a brick through a window and tried to pull him through it after learning of an affair.

And that takes us to our birthday songs of the week.  First stop is thirty years ago, and we look first at my "big four" (for those who haven't been playing along, 4 songs that were 1-2-3-4 at one point on my personal chart and 1-2-3-5 on Billboard at the same time- we've been waiting to see how they fared on Cashbox.)  Total Eclipse of the Heart was #1, and Making Love Out Of Nothing At All was at #2... True, though, was hung up at 4, and One Thing Leads To Another was at 9.  Next week, the Fixx would move up to #7, but 1-2-4-7 was as close as they'd come to matching me or BB.  But as for the songs that first reached the chart this week, we had just one noteworthy- Big Country's In A Big Country.  Turning 35, we have Chicago's Alive Again, Alice Cooper's How You Gonna See Me Now, and the Village People's Y-M-C-A. 

Turning 40 this week are Elton John's Goodbye Yellow Brick Road; Loggins and Messina's My Music; Helen Reddy's Leave Me Alone (Ruby Red Dress); one of my all timer's Steely Dan's My Old School; Olivia yet again with Let Me Be There; and Brownsville Station's Smoking In The Boy's Room.  Turning 45, we have Bobby Vinton's I Love How You Love Me and BJ Thomas' Hooked On A Feeling; and turning fifty, Gene Pitney's 24 Hours From Tulsa.  Blow Out The Candles...


At this point I might do the 45 at 45... but this feature, like the six degrees I would do later, are victims of my rules this week.  That rule being, let's not feature the same thing over and over.  You see, last week's 45 at 45 would have been an Otis Redding tune, and this week would have been Aretha Franklin.  On six D, the rule is it has to be a song on the way down in the top ten.  The only song dropping that actually stayed on the top ten this week was Superstar, which I featured in a famous two-week long battle back here.  For those disinclined to go back, I told the story I found in several places about the song's origin, which then was disputed in comments by Steve Fischler of Magnolia Gold records, defender of all things Delaney Bramlett.  He apparently took umbrage that most sources credited a varying mix of involvement from Bonnie Bramlett, Rita Coolidge, and Leon Russell in writing the song, while Delaney jumped in to register it at EMI and gave himself credit.  In the course of the discussion, I answered a comment on the next week's TM, at which point he went back to the first week to answer it.  When he couldn't find the second post comments on the first post (DUH) he accused me of "deleting a lot of stuff".  I told him to get a grip and look in the right spot, at which point he disappeared and never returned.  So, no, we are not revisiting THAT whole scene.

Oh, nearly forgot- the big mover will be in the top 40, the big dropper is So Far Away, falling to 57, a 35-place tumble.

And speaking of tumbling, how about the former top 40 by the Nightliters, K-Jee?  Since it peaked at #39, it dropped to 54, a 15-spot drop.  But then, it went UP 3 to 51, up 3 again to 48, back down 6 to 54 (again), UP 1 to 53, and this week up again 4 spots to #49!  I wonder if it will ever make up its mind...


And now- Autumn Madness semis!  I finally remembered Laurie's votes, and its a good thing, because the other two voters did a complete split!

Summer Breeze vs A Summer Place (2-1 Summer Breeze):  This one is too hard to pick, so I'll go with the voters here.  Seals and Crofts move on.  (See, I am counting your votes sometimes...)

Wishing You Were Here vs We've Only Just Begun (2-1 for the Carpenters):  I'd just like to note that these two AND Summer Breeze were in the top 12 on the Great Seventies Countdown!  But under the concept of the desert Island, I have to go with Chicago here. 


In just a little bit... the championship!

We have 8 songs hitting the top forty this week!  At number 40, up 5, is a song by a band we did a feature on not long ago- 8th Day with You've Got To Crawl (Before You Walk).  At #39 comes the unusual story of the band Fanny.  Fanny was one of the first charting all-girl bands- in fact, they were the first to release an lp on a major label (Warner Bros).    But when the came up with a name, they were looking for a woman's name, something simple that would be like a "spirit" over them, encouraging them.  They came up with Fanny... but WB, like most of us Americans, made the connotation with a woman's butt.  WB used that as a marketing tool, much to the chagrin of twin sisters June and Jean Millington and their bandmates.  It was even worse in the UK- apparently they considered "fanny" a slang term for vagina, and the band became known as "outrageous feminists" which wasn't really the case.  Their tune, Charity Ball, comes in this week at 39, up nine.  A later footnote is that their last incarnation included Suzi Quatro's sister Patti.

At 38, up 9, are the Five Man Electrical Band with Absolutely Right.  The Grass Roots climb 14 to #37 with Two Divided By Love; Chicago is up 15 with Questions 67 & 68; Santana jumps 27 to #32 with Everybody's Everything; John Lennon leaps 37 to #29 with Imagine... But the big jumper this week, up a whopping 43 to land at 24, Isaac Hayes' Theme From Shaft.

And now, let us turn to the map...

This week on top charting acts of the 50 states, we have:

Oklahoma:  BJ Thomas, who rarely makes an appearance on TM without being mentioned twice, had 26 hot 100s and 5 top tens.

Oregon:  The Kingsmen, who with Louie Louie had 8 hot 100s and 2 top tens.

Pennsylvania:  Al Penwasser  Bobby Vinton, who also gets a second mention, had 44 hot 100s and 9 top tens.

Rhode Island:  The Cowsills were Rhode Islanders when they hit the big time; they had 8 hot 100s and 3 top tens.

South Carolina:  James Brown, with a whopping 96 hot 100s and 9 top tens.

Not THAT James Brown!  C'mon, Man!

Three songs enter the top ten, three drop out.  Falling are:  The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down (6 to 11), Go Away Little Girl (3 to 12), and Ain't No Sunshine (8 to 13).


ANNNND Now... the Autumn Madness finale!  64 songs started to be Chris' Desert Island choice, two remain-

Wishing You Were Here vs Summer Breeze

Only one of the voters had Wishing... the other two had Summer Breeze, but not to win.  For me, the ultimate song to be on the water with was always Wishing You Were Here... and it works when you're on the beach watching, too.  Chicago takes the AM crown!  Thanks to all y'all who helped out here!


The Persuaders move 2 spots into the #10 spot with Thin Line Between Love And Hate.

Stevie Wonder holds at 9 for a second week with If You Really Love Me.

The Free Movement move freely into the top ten, rising 3 to #8 with I've Found Someone Of My Own.

The Stampeders get stuck at #7 for a second week with Sweet City Woman.

Al Green moves up 4 to #6 with Tired Of Being Alone.

Cher leaps from 14 to #5 with Gypsies Tramps And Thieves.  Must have been the botox.

Lee Michaels moves up a spot to #4 with Do You Know What I Mean.

Superstar by the Carpenters (not by "Superstar" as I stupidly typoed last week) slides a notch to #3.

The Osmonds move into the runner up spot this week with Yo-Yo.

Which means that, for a third week at the top...

...Rod Stewart with Maggie May!!!!!

Next week, I MAY do my Martin Hall of Fame... haven't decided yet.  Come back next week to find out!