Martin World News and stuff

You coulda just said no... didn't have to SLAM THE FRICKIN'DOOR on me like this, didja?

 

 

I have news bits AND walk pictures today, my friends.  But first, for our Mexican friends....

Somebody posted this on FB... and one commenter said, "???????????"  Seriously, dude?

Anyway, let's get on to the substantive crap:

ITEM:  This week, another Facebook friend has been posting a lot of those headlines that really should have been thought about before publishing, like, "Homeless man gets house arrest".  Well, I found one, courtesy of my friends at the BBC.  Now, I know this is a sad situation which shouldn't be made light of.  And yes, I realize that there is a "language barrier" between us and the UK.  But seriously, guys...

So, they managed to lose an entire search?  No wonder they couldn't find anyone!

All right, enough of the mirth.  When you consider that 600 local searchers were buried by a second landslide, it's not far off whichever way you read it.  Prayers going out for the survivors.

At the risk of being insensitive yet again, aren't you supposed to sleep UNDER the bridge?

Dad, she's cute... even if she's pooping...

ITEM:  Okay, so I know I have had the advantage of just going through an attempt to memorize the Periodic chart of the elements.  Still. an article titled Elementary, My Dear: 8 Elements You Never Heard Of on Live Science caught my eye.  And I can see most of them on Marc Lallanilla's list being somewhat anonymous- europium, scandium, tellurium, dysprosium.  And I get that I remember Antimony mainly because it somehow got the atomic symbol Sb, and Gallium from a comic book mentioning it.  And maybe you might have a wee problem connecting the element Beryllium to the gem Beryl. (You know, one of the October birthstones?).  But I went to Laurie, who is pretty much the perfect representative of what is and should be common knowledge, and she said without a doubt most people should know one name on the list.

Are you ready?

Argon?  Really?  The third most common gas in earth's atmosphere, used in light bulbs both incandescent and fluorescent, by welders, and dozens of other applications?  Well, you be the judge, I guess.

This is worthy of a MWN item itself.  Got up with a nice wet muddy butt.

Peek!

ITEM:  A friend sent me this one, which the headline is much funnier than the story.  From July of 2009....

Two Mexican Midget Wrestlers Killed by Fake Prostitutes


Of course, the clincher has to be the costumed name of one of the formerly mighty mites:

Autopsies are being performed on the two midget wrestlers, one of whom went by the name "La Parkita" — or "Little Death" — and wore a skeleton costume in the ring. The other was known as "Espectrito Jr."



Now probably going as "Little Dead."

ITEM:  Will there ever be an end to the stupidity in Brazil, as they build up towards their hosting of this year's World Cup and the 2016 Summer Games?  Guess not...

A Brazilian football fan has died after being hit by a toilet bowl thrown at the end of a Second Division match in the north-eastern city of Recife.

Paulo Ricardo Gomes da Silva was struck as clashes took place near one of the entrances to Arruda stadium.

Another three people were reportedly hurt as toilet bowls were ripped out of stadium facilities and hurled at rival fans below.

What exactly is it that makes a minority of soccer fans the biggest idiots in the world?   For example, there is another racial hoo-hah going on in Europe, as a black player was thrown a banana by opposing "fans".    Excuse me, but look at your team- where would your team be if you had no players of color?

Yeah.  Of course, the player had the right idea- he picked up the insulting fruit, peeled it, and ate it before the next play.  The only better thing he could have done was to send the "fan" up a condom large enough to wear over his head.

Have I mentioned we've got ducks everywhere?  Here's a pair at the Green Hole, where I don't believe we've EVER seen ducks...

...and another pair at the duck pond, where ironically, it's been a while since we've seen any.

ITEM:  Remember a few MWNs ago when I did the story about the Norwegian guy and his can of fermented fish being ready to explode?  Well, how about a whole FACTORY'S worth?  A gentleman named Hans-Erik Englund had a warehouse with 1,000 cans of Surstromming- rotten herring canned and left to ferment, a "delicacy" in Norway.  Stress:  had.

Yep, the building caught fire and all 1,000 cans blew sky high over the six-hour stink fest.


One of the cans flew over an outhouse roof, while another shot over the bay to a neighbour's house, Mr Englund said.


I'm wondering how long it will take the neighbor's property values to recover.  Next time you want to go to county council and bitch about your neighbor's new pig farm/ septic pit/ landfill going in, remember- it could be worse.

ITEM:  The latest thing in China?  Walking your cabbage.

The vegetables are being taken for walkies by teenagers in China as a way to get over depression and loneliness.
The youngsters are able to meet other people who also walk the green foods.
Chinese psychiatrist Wen Chao said: ‘The idea is simple – you feel as lonely and as simple as a cabbage, so you begin to act like one and befriend one.
‘And in that acceptance comes change.’

Need I add anything?

ITEM:  Define impaired?  Sure.  How about the guy driving high gets sideswiped by the drunk driver and calls the cops on him?

Malcolm Sidbury, 38, dialed 911 after Thomas Robbins, 57, glanced his car while attempting to pass him on the Taconic State Parkway in New York. Neither man stopped after the incident. When state police finally caught up with the pair, they ended up arresting both men after it became clear that they were both intoxicated.
Mr Sidbury was charged with driving while his ability was impaired by drugs while Robbins, whose blood alcohol level was three times the legal limit, was charged with driving while intoxicated, aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle and leaving the scene of a property damage accident.


Or how about this one? From the Island of St Vincent:

(Carlisle)Williams was arrested March 22 as he was going through Gate 5 at the Grenadines wharf, to board one of the boats that ply the St. Vincent-Grenadines route. A search of his person revealed the drug.

When cautioned, Williams told the police, "Officer, is my weed wey me does smoke to get appetite to eat and brisk up to do work.” 

 

 

(Translation:  He smokes the weed to get the munchies so he will eat and have enough energy to work.)

 

He gave a similar explanation when he appeared in Court on Monday.

When Chief Magistrate Sonya Young asked what type of work he did, Williams said he works when he gets employment.

He was fined $50 forthwith or two days in prison.

 

 

Look, Scrappy!  Daddy found a snail shell!

 

"Big deal."

ITEM:  And finally, from our friends in Australia:

 

 

 

One Sunshine Coast legal brothel, Scarlet Harem, is hoping to lure stressed workers away from computers and construction sites with its lunch offerings.
For a “limited time only” clients can get a deal which includes a hot pie and coke with their choice of a range of “services”.
The special launched this month has been advertised as “Pie, Coke ‘n’ Poke Lunchtime fun” and a “Lady for a Tradie Lunchtime Fun Meal Deal” promising “XXX Pleasures”.
The award-winning brothel has also extended its opening hours and is advertising “early bird” specials.
Madam of 13 years and businesswoman Paris Satine said visiting a bordello was a “different way to spend your lunchtime”.


I wonder if we can combine that concept with the Roach Coach delivery-at-work idea....

Sunday message: Judaizers and others distracted

The one thing that jumped out of my Bible reading this week is the simplicity of what God expects from us.  It is a simplicity that would have been lost on the Judaizers of Paul's day.  You see, they had the comfort of 1,000 years of ritual-  they didn't have to "think" or "search" to know God, He was written right into their rules and regulations.  And as time went on, men- some holy, some not so much- interpreted those rules and regulations FOR them, so that God became not someone you knew, but something you were taught, and knowing the lessons became far more important than the Being they were supposedly emanating from.  And some of them were good rules, and we strive to live by them yet today, like the Ten Commandments.  But just like today, the "tablet" became more important than the words it contained.  What do I mean, "Just like today"?  Well, think about the battles we are having over the Ten Commandments being posted in courtrooms, and Christmas scenes on "public property" (Quote marks indicating that Christians ARE also part of the public), and what have you- and then follow the simplicity of what God wants.

It starts out in Deuteronomy 11:22, where God outlines the three simple things He wanted from them, and wants from us- 
Deu 11:22 "If you carefully observe all of these commands that I'm giving you to do—to love the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, and to cling to him..." #1, Love God.  #2 Walk in His ways, AKA obey.  #3 Cling to Him- come to Him as a child to a parent in all things.   Pretty simple, right?  Then came the next step, at Jesus' baptism:

Mat 3:16 When Jesus had been baptized, he immediately came up out of the water. Suddenly the heavens opened up for him, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and coming to rest on him.
Mat 3:17 Then a voice from heaven said, "This is my Son, whom I love. I am pleased with him!"
And followed up at the Transfiguration:

Mat 17:5 While he yet spoke, behold, a bright cloud overshadowed them. And behold a voice out of the cloud which said, This is My beloved Son in whom I am well pleased, hear Him. Okay, so now we have the fourth command- hear Jesus.  But what was it Jesus was saying?  He summed it up in the most famous verse of all:


Joh 3:16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only-begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

So now we have Jesus' game plan.  But how do we get on the winning side?  Paul, if you would:

Rom 10:9 Because if you confess the Lord Jesus, and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you shall be saved.

And that's all there is to it.  Simple, right?  After that, any discussion of how to do it, where to do it, with what words to do it SHOULD be secondary.


I have tried to convey this on a FB friend's Catholic posts, and for 95% per cent of it, it is well received.  But there is one- maybe two, different accounts but the same words- person, a modern day Judaizer if you will, that cannot conceive of thinking beyond the comfort zone of what "the Church Fathers" have taught him/her.  As a result, when they enter the conversation, I get a lot of:

-You are a heretic (and when you point out "Judge not lest ye be judged", he merely puts some scriptural polish on, "It ain't judging if I'm right.")

-You follow a 500 year old religion, while we date back to Peter (IOW, Martin Luther apparently was the first one to conceive of the Bible as something to be read and studied).

-If not for the Crusades, we'd all be speaking Arabic (as a historian, I really enjoy when he gets to this point and I can totally embarrass him- sad but true).

- Oh, and my favorite- Even when the Church had bad popes (i.e. guys that were holding orgies in the Basillica like Alexander VI), they could DO NO WRONG if speaking FOR THE CHURCH.  Uh, yeah, not real convinced on that one.


Not all of his arguments are so far off the deep end- for example, his taking, as the Church does of the wedding at Cana as the proof for going to Mary first (rather than noticing that Jesus TURNED HER DOWN, and then she said, "Do what HE tells you"; or questioning the logic of Jesus coming to earth as man to not only die for our sins, but to establish a woman as the best way to get God's attention).  I've said many times- I do not believe these to be salvational issues, and I believe you can be a Catholic and be saved...  scroll back up to John 3:16 and the part about WHOEVER believes in Him.  Or if that isn't good enough,  How about this:

Mar 9:38 And John answered him, saying, Master, we saw one casting out demons in Your name, and he does not follow us. And we forbade him, because he does not follow us.
Mar 9:39 But Jesus said, Do not forbid him. For there is no one who shall do a work of power in My name who can lightly speak evil of Me.
Mar 9:40 For he who is not against us is for us.
Mar 9:41 For whoever shall give you a cup of water to drink in My name, because you belong to Christ, truly I say to you, He shall not lose his reward.

But, of course, the person in question would give a long drawn out explanation that boils down to 2 things:  You can't listen to the Bible because it was written by men;  You must get your truth from the Church Fathers, who were men who know better than you.


So he will continue to put up barriers.  You must believe in Child baptism.  You must confess to a priest.  You must believe that the wafer supernaturally becomes flesh.  You must not eat pork, you must be circumcised (Oops, how did THOSE get in there?)


But God didn't put up barriers.  Jesus said,

Mat 11:29 Take My yoke on you and learn of Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you shall find rest to your souls.
Mat 11:30 For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light. Love.  Obey, Cling. Believe.  Confess.  All there is to it.

I want a new duck...

Here ya go!

Yep, it was time for a new toy.  One that might last a little longer...

 

 

 

 ...or maybe not.  So far, only it's head has been deflated. 

(PS- the mosaic on the TV stand conceived and constructed by Laurie, layout by Chris.)

 

 

 "But, Dad!  The fuzz calls to me for release..."

So next up was an evening walk.  There's a couple of doggies we run into often (twice tonight).  Master and leash are around the bend.

 

 

 Down at the creek, and Scrappy wanted me to go across..

 

 

 ...as you can see, I made it over the string of rocks on the left.

Scrappy finds some Jack-in-the-pulpit.

 

 

 See?  There's Jack.

 

 

 Something you don't see in the woods everyday- forks for a lift!

The river is now officially Waaaaaaay Down.

Remember last week when this would have been called "wading"?

I love watching the swallows gracefully dive bombing bugs.

And, from earlier in the week, goldfinch at the feeder.

Time Machine week 2

Today is May 2nd, 1972- the day J Edgar Hoover died.

No word on whether he was singing, "bye, bye, Miss American Pie" when his heart attack struck.


Welcome to week two of the leaner, meaner Time Machine-  the week that Song Sung Blue by Neil Diamond, Old Man by Neil Young, Rocket Man by Elton John, Lean On Me by Bill Withers, and How Do You Do by Mouth and McNeil, and this one, enter the hot 100. 





This would be CCR's last top 40 single.


This week, a six degrees attaches a horse without a name to an Eskimo with a name, we get to play a little guessing game, and the top ten is out of order- literally!

I have to say I'm a little disappointed in our top ten this week- none of them are songs that would really grab me.  So I thought this week I'd do one of the "rotating features" in which I trip back in my mind's eye and try to guess off what I would have had as a top ten if I were doing a top ten back then.  What you get to do- if you want- is guess off which of these charted the highest THIS WEEK.  I will help you (if you have a good memory of last week's show or if you want to cheat) by saying that there IS one Cashbox top ten in my list.  Without further doo-doo, here's how I THINK I would have ranked 'em:

1- Baby Blue, Badfinger
2- Oh, Girl, Chi-Lites
3- Roundabout, Yes
4- Vincent, Don McLean
5- Suavecito, Malo
6- Doctor My Eyes, Jackson Browne
7- Heart Of Gold, Neil Young
8- Betcha By Golly Wow, Stylistics
9- You Could've Been A Lady, April Wine
10- Last Night (I Didn't Get To Sleep At All), 5th Dimension

Okay, so which one is the top tenner on both charts?  Guess now, because we'll very shortly be picking them off.

Next up, "You Peaked!"  And this week's songs on the way down include Dennis Coffey's Taurus (stopping at 13 last week), Honey Cone's The Day I Found Myself at 15- and for you AOR people out there, Led Zep's Rock And Roll at 42.

42?  That blows, dudes...

This week, we have six top 40 debuts.  Gallery, a soft-rock band out of Detroit, hits with a song arranged by the aforementioned Dennis Coffey- Nice To Be With You, which takes a 5 notch jump to 39.  Next up, the Song I Didn't Know Before, courtesy of the Isley Brothers:






IDK about you, but I kept hearing Want Ads in my mind.  The brothers land at 38, also up 5.

At 35, up 6 spots, the Canadian group April Wine with You Could've Been A Lady (and there goes one of your choices!).  Cat Stevens moves up 11 to # 34 with Morning Has Broken; At 31, up 17, is Love Unlimited (AKA Barry White's backup vocalists) with a BJ Thomas-like title- Walking In The Rain With The One I Love.  And finally, up 18 to the high debut of 29, the Jackson 5 with Little Bitty Pretty One.

Two songs will enter the top ten, so 2 bail out.  Falling are Heart Of Gold (there goes #2, falling from 9 to 12) and Roundabout (and there goes a third one, from 10 to 21).

So you have seven left to pick from.  Who will it be?  I will tell you this- it's the # 5 song.  So just to keep you guessing, what's say we scramble the top ten?

We'll start with the song at #8, since it is the six degrees victim this week.  America recorded A Horse With No Name (which drops from 5 to 8) at the Dorset home studio of Arthur Brown, whose Crazy World brought you- FIRE!!  (Ahem)  Anyway, before founding the Crazy World, Brown became the substitute lead singer for a band at the time called The Ramong Sound.  It was named after the former lead singer, Raymond "Ramong" Morrison, who was looking at a six-month engagement in prison.  He left after just a few weeks, and the Ramong Sound morphed eventually into the Foundations, whom you know for their big hits Baby Now That I Found You (#11, 1967) and Build Me Up, Buttercup (#3, 1968).  One of the co-writers on those hits was Mike d'Abo- the lead singer for Manfred Mann, on most of their big hits including- Quinn The Eskimo (The Mighty Quinn)!

So, a horse with no name, an Eskimo named Quinn... can this be far behind?

The Dramatics fall one notch to #4 with In The Rain.

Aretha climbs one to #6 with Day Dreaming.

Roberta Flack holds on to #1 with The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face (see how cleverly I get out of putting her picture up twice?)

The Staple Singers come in at 10, up four spots, with I'll Take You There.

Up a notch to #7, a couple in need of a horse- Sonny and Cher with A Cowboy's Work Is Never Done.

Joe Tex moves a notch upwards to #3 with I Gotcha.

The second debut this week is Al Green's Look What You've Done For Me, sliding up 3 to land at #9.

And then there were two.  Have your guess in hand?

The #2 song again this week was Michael Jackson's Rockin' Robin.

And the winnah?  Well, Last Night was at 33, Doctor My Eyes at 19, Suavecito at 17, Vincent at 15, Oh, Girl at 13, Baby Blue at 14...

And at #5 on Cashbox, it's the song at #8 on my top ten....

...the Stylistics, up a notch to #5 with Betcha By Golly Wow!!!!!!


Did ya win? Oh, well, better luck next week- not that I'm going to confuse y'all THIS bad again....

The A to Z blogging mash-up, part two

Well, today (or tomorrow, as I type) is "Z-day", the end of the month long A to Z blogging challenge.  So here is part two of my mini-version.

O is for Oscar Rafael Say Cumez, the first child we sponsored through Children International.

Oscar dropped out of the program at the age of 15 to help support his family (One of the CI rules is they have to be enrolled in the CI school.)  I often wonder how he is doing and what he is doing.  One thing I do know- he is a fine young man and I wish him the best.

P is for Al Penwasser, who has dropped off the face of Blogger Earth to work on his latest novel.  I still keep up on FB and Words With Friends, but it's not the same as his wonderful sense of blogging humor.  Hopefully he'll get the damn thing writ and come back soon!

Q is for queer, another one of those insensitive words that we're not supposed to use.  You know, like "whitey", "religious zealot", "right wing terrorist", or, as I've seen on gay protest posts, "vagina lover".  I'll admit, my son and I were naming off our least favorite baseball teams and came up with the "queer" Mets, the "lesbian" Phillies, the "gay" Yankees, the "homo" Cardinals, etc.  And when those other terms disappear from the lexicon of those who don't like Caucasian, Christian, Conservative, straight people, I'll worry about my use of the ones I used at home.

R is for racism (Geez, you going for alienating the REST of the audience?).  The recent lifetime ban of LA Clippers owner Don Sterling for telling his bi-racial mistress not to bring blacks to his basketball games is interesting, but to me only from the point of view of money and hypocrisy.  Stealing a bit from fellow blogger LC over at Back In The USSR, I find it funny that a man who had been busted for his racism SEVERAL times was going to get a lifetime achievement award from the NAACP, was cutting checks to several grateful black players and a black head coach, all without a peep until TMZ shoved it in their faces.  NOW he's a hate-mongering imbecile who isn't worthy to work in polite company.  Well guess what?  You've all been more than happy to take money from this same man for all these years- and it was no secret what he was like.  Kinda like the bi-racial mistress who is being sued by his wife for return of some $1.8 million worth of sugar daddy gifts she received.  You might even call her a whore.  If the shoe fits, NAACP, players, and Doc Rivers...


S is for sliding into mediocrity.  A few days back, I heard a convo between our production manager and the corporate big boss which led me to one inescapable conclusion:  Our main customer is so screwed up, that they cannot afford to unscrew without collapsing into a hot steaming pile.  And that to work with them, they require a supplier to be just as screwed up as they are.

A few days later, we had to hot rush some items for a new customer.  Why the rush?  Because someone at corporate had sent the orders to our Missouri plant instead of us.

That day, I announced in the break room, " A few days ago, I told someone that (our main customer) cannot function unless their suppliers are as screwed up as they are.  GUESS WHAT?  WE MADE IT!!!"

T is for tornadoes.  We watched on TWC all last night as town after town in Mississippi were raked not once, but twice, by monster storms.  The nightmare is beginning to happen again as I type, this time seemingly with Alabama and North Carolina as the targets.  Please help us pray for these people.

U is for Ursula, my mom's name.  I never knew how hard it was to spell Mom's name until she died.  We were in the Catholic Church then, and we would watch the bulletin for the days where someone would pay to have a mass said in her name.  In three weeks, I saw her name misspelled three different ways- the last one (and only one I truly remember) was "Urusual". 

Laurie's Mom's name was Laurice.  We have the unusual in common.  And just wait till my grandchildren (long may they wait) ask me why they have a dad named KC or a mom named Shenandoah.   (Answers:  #1- Their grandma is an idiot.  #2- I liked the song from the movie.)


V is for Valetudinarian.  I was looking on Google under "V is for" and quickly learned that unless I got Bobby G. to come over to do a "V For Vendetta" mini-bit, I'd have to just consult a dictionary.  And there I found this word.  This word describes one who likes to discuss "one's poor health or ailments".  How about that, Grandma Girardot was a valetudinarian!  She'd have probably told me, "Now, Christ (small "i", she always added the "t" for some reason), you daresn't (her favorite word) use such language."


W is for Woody, my Dad, Louis Woodrow Martin.  Called Woody all his life since Louis C. Martin was his Dad.  My Dad had a LOT of warts which I have discussed over the years.  But the bottom line is that he did the best he knew for us, especially me, and helped raise 5 semi-well adjusted kids.  It has taken a lot of years- and is still a battle- to see him in a positive light.  But that light is there, especially in my sister's two boys, who think the world of him.

Mom and Dad with niece Raine at her first communion.

X is for the "Unknown Soldier".  Huh?  Well, think about it.  It is the third least used letter in the language (.015 % of words use it) behind q and z.  So it is used in science, math, even entertainment (see X-Factor) as the symbol of that which is unknown.  I think that perhaps when we use the letter, perhaps that would be a good time to remember the Unknown Soldiers in OUR lives as well.


Y is for yet.  Yet is one of the most powerful words in the language.  It shows that beyond politics, beyond the eyes, beyond even the imagination, something exists.  When Galileo was forced to preserve his life against the inquisition by recanting his theory that the earth moves around the sun, he ended the recanting with, "And yet, it moves."  Yet is what holds the spheres in place; yet fills our lungs with air.  We cannot live without yet.


Z is for Moose.  Huh?  Well, that was the first thing that came up on Google.  It was a kids book by Kelly Bingham and Paul Zelinsky, in which a Zebra was trying to match every animal with a letter.  But Moose got mad when M went to Mouse.  Hilarity ensued.  I haven't read it but it sounds pretty good.

 

 

 

And there you have it!  See, why do a post every day of the month when you can accomplish all in two?  (Oh, yeah, the "challenge" thing.)

You give 'em books, they eat the pages

This is a phrase an ancient co-worker (as in, "a past co-worker", not "an elderly co-worker") used to use a lot at our old job.  (He also used to say, "If it were up your a$$ kicking footballs, you'd know where it was", but I digress.)  Today I thought I might be away from those who would cause me to say that, as I woke up (in fact went to bed) achy and exhausted and called off work today.

However, all-day sleep was not to be mine today, as I had made an appointment to get the brakes checked in the Impala.  Since we are a one-car duo, I would have to rent a car to work through this.  So, plan was, go get the rental car at 3, drop the Impala off at the service center.  We went in to the rental place, got Laurie's end of the proceedings done, and I told her, "Go on ahead."

Minutes pass, and I am driving the tiny, wind pushed Mazda to the service center.

No Laurie, No Impala.

Call her.  "Where are you at?"
"You told me to go on."
"TO THE SERVICE CENTER, THE SERVICE CENTER."
"Oh, DUH!!!"

Yes, she had completed half the job and went home.  As she started on her way to defeating the idea of doing things efficiently, I went in to the service center and told the lady, "I have a funny story to tell you."
"Okay..."
"I'm here to drop off a car I don't have."

Nonetheless, the job is now done, and the teeny little temporary member of the family is ensconced in the parking spot of honor.

"...and here's the keys to your new Speck...."

As long as you're here, here's some Scrappy walk pics from Sunday...

Brother Hawk was out and about...

I believe there is a family of chipmunks or gophers that live under the bridge.  They are driving Scrappy nuts...

...as well as into risky searches.