Martin World News

 

So last night I tried to do an "Around the World", but my news plane lost power and went splat somewhere near the Bay of Bengal; tonight, I'll try the more traditional "news" post, as always looking for the best fits to my snarky sensahuma.  Let's start...

FoxNews: When is 'being cute' actually racist?

Headline: Hegseth, Britt accuse Air Force of 'malicious' pause as it reinstates training on Tuskegee Airmen

In case you don't know it, the last few years has populated the US Military with leaders more interested in being woke than being useful.  In other words, not big fans of President Trump.  So when he demanded all services to 86 DEI policies, the smarta$$ leadership group at the air force decide to be cute- removing training films on the legendary Tuskegee Airmen (a black unit during the days of segregation) and the WASPs (the Women's Air Service) because, "Well, Trump doesn't want DEI, so everything must be all white".  Thinking that they could score some cheap publicity points by doing something completely stupid and blaming it on Trump, it backfired miserably; the new SecDef reversed the decision, the leadership gave a, "sorry, we misunderstood, wink-wink", and personally, I can't wait to see which hands get slapped for this.

CNN: Kind of the point

Headline: Denmark boosts Arctic defense spending by $2 billion after Trump’s Greenland interest

Denmark fell for this one.  Who would you rather have up north guarding the north from Russians and Chinese?  Americans, whom you have to pay for, or Danes, who you don't?  There's another $2 Billion Trump has saved us already!

BBC World: It's not the belching I'm worried about

Headline: Backlash in Kenya over livestock vaccines and belching cows

In order to pass export laws, Kenya is giving out free vaccines for Foot-in-mouth disease and PPR (sheep or goat plague), hoping to get the total of livestock vaccinated up from 10% to 85% in the next three years.  A noble goal except- is that what the vaccine is REALLY for?  Many people believe that the shots are a plan- suggested on video by Bill Gates- to decrease the animals' methane emissions.  And according to government officials, some villages are willing to kill you if you try it.

Caleb Karuga, a former journalist and now an influential farmer, posted on X that he would resist the jabs, saying no-one will vaccinate his livestock just "because Bill Gates said so".

Ledama Olekina, an opposition senator and prominent Maasai pastoralist, wrote on X: "There [are] millions of cows in Europe and America and none of them are being vaccinated for farting … mine will not be vaccinated."

I don't know if Bill really is trying to make a fartless cow, but he better not come towards me with a needle... no matter WHAT Laurie says.

RT (Russia)- Even they think you Brits are sumasshedshiy

Headline:  Do not use terms like ‘black sheep’ and ‘blacklist’ – guide for UK police

Because, of course, anything with 'black' attached to it is racist in the current ultra-woke climate in the UK.  Other terms, and why they are to be avoided:

-replacing “pregnant woman” with “pregnant person” to be more inclusive of transgender and non-binary individuals.

-advises against the term “faith,” which it describes as “Christian-centric...” 

- also discourages assumptions about older individuals being “grumpy” or associating menopausal symptoms with women in their 50s. The term “mature adult” is also flagged for potentially suggesting that younger people are immature.

I apologize to anyone who doesn't think this is stupid... but....

Xinhua- Participation trophy, dictator-edition

Headline: Xi congratulates Lukashenko (of Belarus) on reelection as Belarusian president

Because nothing says, "Great job!", like one guy who can't help but getting elected telling another guy who can't help but get elected, 'Wow, you got elected!' 

The Japan News- Speaks for itself

Two headlines- you be the judge...

1) Don’t Let AI ‘Rip off’ Artists, Beatles Star McCartney Warns UK Government

2) 2 Beatles Songs from ’90s to Be Remixed with AI for Clearer Vocals by John Lennon, Says George Harrison’s Son

And, finally...

DW (Germany)- the headline is the joke

This time I have to tell the story first.  The story reports the annual blooming of the Corpse Flower- a big, ugly bloom that smells like it's name.  Every year, somebody has to do a story on this ultra-aromatic event, so I understand that you really have to work on a good hook to spark interest.  And someone at DW looked up the meaning of its scientific name, and built it into their headline:

Australians flock to smelly opening of 'misshaped penis'

In the article: Its species name, Amorphophallus titanum, meanwhile, means "titanic misshaped penis" in Ancient Greek.

Somehow, I chuckle at the thought of Hercules using this to insult Ares...

...like right after that blow...