What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.

SOCK IT TO ME BABY!!!

Friday, December 6, 2019

Time Machine co-ordinates VICXXI60112673


Today we enter the timestream on December 6th, 1973- the day that the House Of Reps voted in favor of Jerry Ford being the new Vice President, taking over for the resigned Spiro "But Block assured me it was a legitimate deduction" Agnew.  In looking into this, I happened upon a story in which reporter/Professor Joseph J Fins tracked down a rumor that the man who would have been President had Nixon resigned before Ford was approved- Democrat House Speaker Carl Albert- had decided to resign before he could be appointed President.  From Indiana senator Birch Bayh's memories:

Memories of Watergate shared by former Sen. Birch Bayh, a Democrat from Indiana, were the highlight of the meeting. Bayh, the primary author of the 25th Amendment and an expert on presidential succession, recalled how congressional leaders worried about the appearance of a coup d'état back in 1973 after the Agnew resignation. If Albert became president while the vice presidency was vacant, he would also bring a new party into power.  Bayh memorably phrased it as the presidency going to “the party opposite.” To avoid this, Bayh told us that there was a gentleman’s agreement in which Albert would resign so that the Democratic House could elect Jerry Ford as speaker. This would keep the presidency under Republican control.

When Fins tried to talk to Bayh about this, he was told by an aide that (as he waited till 2017), the Senator basically wasn't compus mentis enough to be any help.  However, the aide recalled that there was supposed to be a secret memo from Ted Sorenson apparently trying to talk Albert OUT OF resigning in the event.  What did Albert have to say?  From his memoirs...

Nonetheless, Albert was on the record that any succession should not be a partisan affair. For example, in his 1990 autobiography, he wrote, “Otherwise sensible people saw a chance to forestall Ford’s confirmation, impeach and remove Nixon, and hand the presidency to the next in line, me.”

But Albert would have nothing of it. “In an impeachment inquiry, two institutions would be judged, not one,” he wrote in his memoir. “We would examine the president, and the American people would examine us. I did not know what we would learn about the president, but I never doubted what the people would learn about their House of Representatives.” 


How I would love to have Albert rise from his grave and explain THAT to our current Congress.


Carl Albert, back when Congressmen had character.
And with that, we step away from politics for a bit for this week's Time Machine, featuring two new debuts on the M10, Johnny Nash, the Songs of November, a surprise announcement, and a Time Machine Round Table over the coming structure of TM!  All in favor, read on!


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All right, I want to call this meeting of the TM board to order...

Elvis:  Man, what's this all about?

I have a few proposals I want to make that might significantly change things around here, and...

Nardole:  I knew it.  Here come the lay-offs.  Right before Christmas, every time...

No, no lay offs, But I want to have a little more time for features without making people read forever.  What I would like to do...

Bellbottom:  Before we continue, perhaps we should report on the idea from last post about adding the R&B songs...

Well, two reports there.  Number one, nobody commented yay or nay, so I'm assuming it's not a big deal...

E:  Exceptin' to that Hayes fella...

...and number two, it seemed as I experimented with it this week to be an almighty pain-in-my-butt- and that brings me to my proposal.

N:  So that would be a no on the R&B chart...

Correct.  I want to continue gathering the votes as previous.  However...

E:  NOW here come the lay-offs!

NO LAY OFFS!  No, what I propose to do is, rather than have the guest read EVERY song that got a vote, just have him hit the highlights on the one vote wonders and 'also receiving votes' list, and let him really punch up the final choices...

E:  That'd clear a LOT of dead wood...

B:  I am concerned about our legal exposure on this...

Why?  They aren't under contract for just getting mentioned!

B:  I suppose not...

So I'm gonna give the total contestants, and the total stations voting, and let the fans in on just the interesting or noteworthy members of the Panel.

N: And the others?

Consider them the 'dropped out before the primaries' group.  Maybe we could use Kamala Harris's picture to lead in....

B:  I would most sternly advise against that...

Yeah, you're prolly right.  Next up, while I really like this Song of the Month thing we do, it gets a little unwieldy as well, mentioning ALL the songs that won the month each year, PLUS the ones that sneak in in-between, so I propose starting this week, we limit it to the top, say, 12...

E:  The Dirty Dozen...

YICH!  Why don't we call it the Darling Dozen, or something else more appropriate..

E:  Ewww, the 'darlin' dozen'?  That makes 'em sound...

B:  DON'T SAY IT, Mr Presley...

Yeah, will just go with the Song of (your month here) for now...

N:  Is that everything?

No just one more thing, the special announcement!  Spotify sent me an e-mail that they put together lists of the songs I played the most for each year I've been on there, so next week, we kick off holiday fun with the songs Spotify says I played the most!  Now, let's play a debut and get ready for Mr Nash!  This is an act I  have tried to sneak in for a LONG time, and I finally get to introduce them to you!  This is the husband/wife duo calling themselves Tennis...





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Hi, Johnny!  Well, this will be new for both of us...

J:  Yeah, so I hear... but new never hurt no one, right?

Yep!  So here's what you need to know...

Thank you, Mr Martin!   This week, we have 19 official contestants from 55 stations.  So there were 11 one vote wonders, near as I can tell... including a really funky number off a Mexican station by an act called Ripple, titled, I Don't Know What It Is, But It Sure Is Funky.  Chris gives it a top recommendation, and it was on the chart at #59.  Also, our Australian fans contributed votes for Barry Blue's Dancing On A Saturday Night, and ...the Monster Mash...

Then on the also voted list, we had three more tunes, topped by the DeFranco Family's Heartbeat, It's A Lovebeat, charting at #13 and receiving 2 votes from Canada.  And now, may we have a calypso beat, hah hah...

Choose from the following finalists:

Ringo Starr, with the #2 song, Photograph....
The Carpenters at #1 with, appropriately, Top Of The World...

MY choice for #1 this week, by the way...

...Elton John at #4 with Goodbye Yellow Brick Road...
...Steve Miller with The Joker at #18....
...and Jim Croce with Time In A Bottle at #26.  Say, he did quite well for himself this week, because here he is at number...

SHHHH, that's the 6D song!  So anyway, pick from Ringo, Karen and Richard, Elton, Steve, or Jim, and we'll try to get the rest of this wrapped up!  In the meantime, here's the other debut, and it's a third in a row from Saint Asonia at #8...




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So thanks to the board meeting we're running WAAAAAY behind here, so let me bring in Elvis to do the Songs of November!  As you might recall, this is all the top fives in the month, Billboard and Cashbox, from 1955 to 1976, pointed out and put in order!  And like I said, rather than go through all 30 or so songs this HAS been involving the last couple of months, just the top 12...

The Dirty Dozen...

Sigh, whatever.  I will note however, that Panelist Photograph won 1973, and POTM Johnny Nash's I Can See Clearly Now took 1972!  King, all yours!

'Bout durn time!  So there was a big ol' tie at the #12 spot, an' we broke it off of Music VF points as usual, an' the winner- Bobby Darin's Mack The Knife, the swingin' winner from 1959!
Number 11 went to the second place from '58- 'It was a very good year'- The Kingston Trio an' Tom Dooley!
Number ten wuz another tie, an' we broke it the same way.  So ten goes to Nino Tempo and April Stevens an' Deep Purple, the winner from '63, an' the number nine spot goes to the Sooo-premes an' Baby Love, winner in '64!
Another tie in the next spot, an' the tie breaker gives number eight to- HEY, It's me with Love Me Tender!!!! The winner from 1956!  It got beat in this lame tie-breaker set-up by Jimmy Dean an' Big Bad John, the winner from '61.

You have a better idea, let's hear it...

Yeah, all ties go to ME!  Haw Haw!  Anyway, Number 6 was Mary Hopkin's Those Were The Days from 1968, but not the winner of '68...
Number five wuz Elton John with Island Girl, the winner in '75.  Hey can we put in that duck picture?

Why not?


That'n always cracks me up!
Number four is my good buddy Conway Twitty with It's Only Make Believe, the winner in '58...
Number three is those stupid...
AHEM....

Yeah, yeah, three is the Beatles and Hey Jude, the winner in '68...
Number two is the Fifth Dimension an' Wedding Bell Blues from 1969...

An' the biggest Song of November is... is...








YEAAAH BABY!!! It's me with Jailhouse Rock from '57!  IWINIWINIWIN IBEAT THESTUPIDBEATLES YESSS!!!!!

So while Elvis finishes slobbering all over himself, let's take a look at the 6D victim- as Johnny Nash almost told you, it was Jim Croce's I Got A Name at #3 on Cashbox this week, the one big hit he had that he didn't write- the Gimbel/Fox team wrote it, and Jim loved it because he had just lost his own father.  I had a list to throw in here, but geez, this is a lot of lists!  So let me just say I found it funny that when I looked into the lp of the same name, that the song came from, among the credits was, "Leroy Brown, vocals"!  Coming as it did just after the success of Bad Bad Leroy Brown, and because of the fact I could find zip zero nada about such a singer, I'm betting that this was a joke reference- either on the lp or on Wikipedia...


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And on stat pack, I had the big mover as Paul McCartney and Wings with Helen Wheels, going up 21 spots from 54-33;  the UK top dog was, unfortunately, Gary Glitter with I Love You Love Me Love; top debuts included BTO's Blue Collar at 94 and Barbra Streisand (did I ever tell you that legend has it my Grandma Girardot always pronounced her name "Strei-pan"?) and The Way We Were at 100; and our curious cover feature gives us:

Jody Miller (the girl that answered King Of The Road with her Queen Of The House) doing The House Of The Rising Sun- was THAT the house she was queen of? INSTANT REVIEW #2- I jumped back in time so this shows up first- Unlike the review you'll be reading next (Actually last, as it turns out-H.B.), this song needs a bit more scream to the voice- and the line, "it's been the ruin of many a poor girl" leaves an odd feel...
A band called Wednesday covered J Frank Wilson's classic Last Kiss- a fact that somehow led to his original re-entering the countdown this week, just 2 spots behind Wednesday's #97 spot.  INSTANT REVIEW #3- figured I might as well- Vocals, bass, and drums pretty much like the original, and the keyboard is annoying.
And Melanie doing Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow... Listening right now, stay tuned for instant review! REVIEW:  With her rather unique voice, this could have been a real cluster, but she really did it good.  Her voice lends itself to sounding better when she isn't screaming IMHO.


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Okay, quickly, the M10 remainders:

Criminal Hygiene has a mixed bag week- just up one to #9 with Mississippi Belle, while Incompletely gets a second straight 3-notch climb to #4...
John Schneider hangs on for a 7th week, dropping 1 spot to 7 with Stained Glass.
Jeff Lynne's ELO couldn't beat down Brooke Annibale's door at the top, and falls from 2 to 6 with Down Came The Rain.
Emo Oranges hold at 5 with West Coast Love.
The Derevs- now holding two of the top 4 longest songs in M10 history- go to #3 with It's The Love.
Brooke Annibale, having fended off Jeff, falls back to #2 after 3 weeks at the top.  And the new #1....



Carroll with Fern!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And your Panel picks?


Jim Croce and Steve Miller only got you 7.2% each...

Ringo snaps in with 12.7 %

The Carpenters come in with 14.5% (I know, I know, Tim wants a recount...)

And the winner, with 23.6%....





Sir Elton Duck with Goodbye Yellow Brick Road!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hopefully, he'll be a better sport over this good-natured fun than he was the LAST time he came on the show... but after he cussed out those security guards at his concert the other day, be prepared for a special guest replacement when we go to 1974!


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