What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?Nice people are martyrs. Idiots are evangelists.

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Monday, January 16, 2023

Martin World News

 

Well, it's raining here, so Misty and I are still on one rather boring walk for the new year.  So instead of pics, you get my pics of the stupidest news Item on the flag page of our beloved news sites around the world.


#1 FoxNews

" Biden's docs mess could be one of the biggest political scandals ever".

Oh, please.  I bet there isn't one President, Vice-President, important (in their own mind) lawmaker, or rich lobbyist since 1959 (first Xerox copier hits the market) that doesn't have something allegedly classified in some half-remembered box of "Crap from office" somewhere.  You'd need a substantially enormous list of "top political scandals" to even rate.  It probably struggles to make the top ten of "Joe Biden's political scandals".


#2 BBC World News

" Taliban start buying blue ticks on Twitter"

For a moment, I thought they were referring to the hound dog.  I wondered what on earth they were going to use them for...

"Me too..."

It seems, though, that "ticks" in British English equals "Checks" in American gibberish, so I guess Arabian raccoons are in no danger...yet.


#3- CNN

" 'The ball boy took my racket': Rafael Nadal loses favorite racket at Australian Open" 

"WAAAAAH!   WAAAAH!

 #4- The Moscow Times

" Why Aren't Russians Abroad Doing More to Protest the War? "

So about 50 individual countries, the European Union, and about 900 private companies are in some form of boycott/sanctions against Russia for Putin's exercise in Hitlerian diplomacy.  He seems to be ignoring it all.  But boy, get 50-60 protesters out on the National Mall, and watch him crumple.  Yeah.

#5- News.Au (Australia)

" Samuel Johnson’s extraordinary spray against Molly Meldrum in live TV interview"

So first off, like we did for the BBC, a bit of translation- "spray" is roughly equal to "temper tantrum".  And what, pray tell is the tantrum about?  Johnson, an actor, has apparently been bashing Meldrum, "an Aussie TV legend", ever since Johnson PLAYED Meldrum in a 2016 miniseries.  Apparently the latest fall-on-the-floor-and-slam-my-fists was occasioned by Meldrum allegedly mooning the audience at an Elton John concert.  Not only is this a bizarre little tale, but also today's lead story, on a "news" site that always seems to put the latest entertainment gossip front and center.  Much like FoxNews would if Joe Biden would just shred documents.

#6- France 24

" Anthropologist Chowra Makaremi says Iran protests 'fuelled by anger' "


 
Let's bring in the MWN Chief Editor/opinion page to respond to this...



Because soooo many protests are out of love and camaraderie...


#7- Deutsche Welle (Germany)

" Can real croissants do without butter?"

Now, I will give the Germans this- it was the very last item on their front page.  Right after "The most Beautiful Winter Travel Destinations" and "An Insider's Look At Warsaw."

And let's try one more... oh, how about...

#8- Japan Today

" Russian ex-President Medvedev says  Japanese Prime Minister Fumio Kishida should disembowel himself"

With colectomies running about 5 million Yen, it may be that Dmitri was just trying to be thrifty in hard economic times...

4 comments:

  1. So... He's my take on the classified docs.... WTH? We have better tracking on microchipped shelter dogs. I don't care who is in charge, there needs to be some accountability for these files, a check in check out of sorts. Ridiculous.

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    Replies
    1. Hilary's e-mails alone contained 30,000 items marked classified. Good luck with that. Thus, I try to find the humor in it.

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