M10 2.0.5

 

Okay, so I was scuffling for a hook for this week's list when I thought:  We just had a new Pope elected, let's do something with that!  So I am going to give you the Billboard #1 for that week- and the M10 (actually, my best guess at what would have been my M10) #1 as well!  But first, I have to tabulate Wednesday night's list and figure out just WHO this week's M10 is!

Okay, so some ten minutes of chicken-scratching later, I have the M10- and there is but one debut.  It's not new to me, as it has been trying for four weeks to escape the "bubbling under 5" I never show y'all.  But this week it noses in at #9 for Evanescence...

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Okay, so I decided to have some real fun and go back to the first Pope of the 20th century- Saint Pius X, elected in August of 1903- and my sources say that the #1 way back then was Cal Stewart's comedy disc featuring his character Uncle Josh and Uncle Josh Buys An Automobile, which is a pretty funny look at the state of driving 125 years ago.

Next up was Benedict XV who was elected in September of 1914.  The number one that week was Billy Murray with The 20th Century Rag.  It was a fast paced tour of how to become a millionaire.

We got Pius XI in February of 1922, and his election song was The Club Royal Orchestra with The Sheik.  If it means anything, the post says the CRO was actually the Clyde Doerr Orchestra, as Clyde apparently recorded under different names with different labels- not an uncommon thing back then.

Next we had yet another Pius, XII, and he assumed the throne in March of 1939.  His "coronation song" was Larry Clinton's orchestra with knockout singer Bea Wain with Deep Purple.  A song you can't go wrong with... 

That finally brings us into M10 range, as well as official Billboard #1s range, with new Pope John XXIII.  He was brought on board with Tommy Edwards and It's All In The Game.  Now had I been around to do an M10, my likely #1 that week sat at #3- the Kingston Trio with Tom Dooley.  (At this point, you oldsters like me will know most of these songs, so I am taking the option to forego the links and let you find them should you want to. Fell free to mock and insult me in the comments.)

It was in June of 1963 (at least I am alive at this point!) when the next man up was Paul VI, and his #1 was Kyu Sakamoto's Sukiyaki- which, while I love, my attention would have been drawn to Bobby Vinton's Blue On Blue at #5.

The last of the 20th century elections went to John Paul- hey wait a minute, there were 2 John Paul's in 1978!  The first was elected in late August, when Grease was the word!  To my best recollection, that particular week I had Chris Rea's Fool If You Think It's Over at the top.

However, he joined the Choir Invisible just a few weeks later, and the second John Paul took office in late October.  By this time, Billboard had Exile's Kiss You All Over at the top, and I likely had Boston's Don't Look Back up at that point.

That brings us into "the land of the #1s Chris doesn't really know", AKA most of the 2000's.  Next man up was Benedict XVI in April of 2005, and the #1 was 50 Cent with Candy Shop.  My favorite on that week's top 40 would have been Weezer's Beverly Hills, which had just debuted at #25.

Following his surprise retirement came the recently deceased Francis in March of 2013.  His inaugural song was somebody going by the name of Baauer and Harlem Shake.  My perusal of the top 40 that week says about the best I could do is Imagine Dragons with Radioactive, which is a pretty low bar.  Had benedict retired a little quicker, I could have named Gotye's Somebody I Used To Know, but it dropped out of the Hot 100 that very week.

Which brings us to this week, and the election of Leo XIV- the first Leo since just before we started this journey in 1903.  Billboard says Kendrick Lamar is at the top with Luther- which makes three in a row from acts I don't really know and am fairly convinced I don't want to.  The M10, you say?  Well, let's get to the rest of my ten and see who Leo gets from me!

10- down another two for Lucius and Impressions.

8- and slipping a spot for the Flaming Groovies and Revolution.

7- and down 2 for Allison Kraus and Richmond On The James.

6- and down 3 for Beabadoobee and Sway.

5- one notch up for Sam Roberts and Brother Down.

4- a big six spots up for Counting Crows and Under The Aurora.

3- up one for Linkin Park and Up From The Bottom.

2- and holding, Amira Elfeky and Forever Overdose.

Which means the M10 coronates a new Pope with...

Cole Swindell and Spanish Moss, for a third week!

I have to share the funny side of the new Pope's election.  Last night, I asked the X AI, Grok, who were the front runners.  One candidate caught my eye- Pierbattista Pizzabolla.  I told Grok, "I hope he wins and becomes Pope Pizza I!"  Grok played along, suggesting he would "deliver" on peace and would soon be "topping" the church with love.  I told all this to my best Catholic expert, who quipped, "Pizzabolla would take the Papal name John, becoming Papa John."  (Papa Johns being a US pizza chain, in case you were wondering.)  To which I could only reply...

"Winner winner pizza dinner."