Chris answers spam, part one

Ever since I did the announcement of Peanut's little sister, I get spam on a pretty constant basis, most of it on that post.  I suspect because I lifted the ultrasound off of FB, but who am I to question Mark the Z?  Anyway, I thought perhaps if I responded here to all these idi- er, I mean, hard working and well-intentioned spammers, it might help alleviate the problem.  So here is my first "Chris answers spam" post!  Enjoy.


Comment #1:  Joe from Poughkeepsie* comments:  "Sagittarius. -Outfit watches.  Looks.  Libra. TYPES OF WATCHES."

Joe, Sagittarius is based on a mythical Centaur, and they went extinct sometime after the Argo sailed.  They had horses' bodies, so they neither had outfits nor watches to wear with them.  Libra was a set of scales, not a time piece.  And there's no need to shout.


Comment #2:  Illya who lives 5 miles from you writes:  "Omega Seamster 300.  They are usually in style."

Illya, you should get together with Joe.  And let him know that "Seamster", while a great name for a sewing machine, not so much for a $5,000 watch.


Comment #3:  Betty@ASU .edu states:  "Men are putting on the A. Lange & Sohne ref."

Betty, I see you are yet another watch seller.  AL&S, on their website, has this to say:

Our timepieces are the embodiment of everything that A. Lange & Söhne stands for. We feel a deep sense of pride when we hold them in our hands. And yet it is not only the results of our work that make us who we are.


And you are so proud of them you let spammers like Betty try to do free advertising on blogs read by people who couldn't afford $5,000 watches if they wanted one.

BTW I haven't worn a wristwatch since I was about 14.  It had glowing hands, so it's prolly where my "tumor" started.**

Comment #3:  "Dear one" from Benin Republic asks: "I love your blog... very nice colors and scheme. Did you make this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it?  Plz reply as I'm looking to construct my own blog and would like to know where u got this from. Kudos"

Well, darling, if you were human and not a bot, you might notice the "blogspot. com" in the address which would answer that question, now wouldn't it?  BTW, the only human person who ever commented on my layout complained he had a hard time reading the text on turquoise.  He's dead now.  Coincidence?***


Comment #4:  Pierre who isn't really from Strasbourg comments: "Hello there I am so glad I found your weblog, I really found you by mistake, while searching on Google for something else, Anyhow I am here now and I would just like to say thanks a lot for a remarkable post and a all around interesting blog (I also love the theme/design), I don't have time to browse it all at the moment, but I have saved it and also added your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read agreat deal more, Please do keep up the excellent b"

Well, Pierre, I guess you don't have the period (.) over in not really Strasbourg, and use commas exclusively, I will record another vote for my theme, and congrats on being the first person I've seen use the term "weblog" since before I started blogging,


Comment #5 (and 6): Esperanza from Vietnam**** asks:  "Hi My name is Esperanza. Few days ago. i published an article about the best gynecological clinic address in Hanoi.  Hope you read and feedback your review to me. Tks.  Here is my article link: (Redacted for YOUR safety).

I actually shared this on FB a couple weeks back.  Since then, our Latina Vietnamese emigrant expert on GYN clinics changed her name to Genevieve and asked the same request, right down to the link address (again redacted for the reader's safety).  However, according to Google, she/they would be talking about 298I Kim Mã, Ba Đình, Hà Nội 10000, Vietnam, if any of you are curious.  If so, please send Esperanza and Genevieve my love.



Comment #7:  Low Carb Leader states:  "online gambling casino casino gambling real money casino 100 no deposit usa casinos play casino slots"


LCL, I suggest you contact the National Gambling Hotline.  You need help that I don't offer.  But if you're ever in Hanoi and need an OB-GYN...


Comment #8:  Next up, a couple of comments that came through within minutes from each other so I will assume they are connected.  Dora from Albuquerque asks first:

"Incense burning is a time honored custom."

And moments later followed up with:

"This same technique can be used to refresh you bed"

I sleep with a dog with a bladder control problem.  Febreeze has all it can do to help.  But I'll think about it...


Comment #9: A friend of Pierre's had a follow-up statement.  He writes:  "la création de sites web, c'est notre métier"  (Creating websites, this is our business)

Abusing them, this is mine.


Comment #10: Next up is a rather wide ranging comment from a T. Taylor, formerly of the Detroit area:  "While charcoal grills vary from $80 to even $500, propane gas grills cover everything from a minimum of $200 to even $4,000 or more. Unlike a couple of months course, a cooking class is one thing you'll be able to pay on an attendance bases.  More compact dishwashers are compatible to obtain a smaller household of 2 to 4 customers."


But I have a few questions here.  1, does the charcoal or the propane attain the higher earth orbit?  2- Do you get credits for watching Cooking With Irma, or do you need to be in-studio? And 3, which brand dishwasher works best on poaching salmon? *****




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Wow, and my spam file still isn't empty!  Be back next week for part two of "Chris answers spam"!  Oh, and the asterisks...

*- All names and addresses of commenters are fictitious. No resemblance to any non-bot being is unintentional.

**- "Tumor" is what I blame sudden coughing spells on; no need to send get well cards, though prayers are always appreciated.

***- Totally a coincidence.  He was worth 100 spammers.

****- At least one assumes that "Esperanza and/or Genevieve" are from Vietnam.  Otherwise, they go a long way for OB-GYN appointments.

*****- All references in this reply reference Tim Allen's comedy Home Improvement.  If you didn't know this, you need to get the reruns!